Today on Power Rangers, Tommy tries his hand at being the Emo Ranger. He fails miserably, leaving that spot open to be claimed (quite successfully) at a later date.
We left off with a candle made of "special" wax burning down in Rita's Dark Dimension. It's going to steal Tommy's powers when it burns down completely. Nobody has thought to just blow it out.
In a matter of about five seconds of trying, Alpha has located the door to the dark dimension. Billy has also managed to somehow, in the span of said five seconds, build a machine that will create a portal that will take them through said door of the dark dimension. Okay then.
Jason and Tommy argue over who gets to go and Tommy eventually caves. There's a whole spiel about trusting your friends and stuff, but the dialogue is so awkward and the acting is so bad, I really kind of just glazed over during that part as a coping mechanism. Tommy wishes his friends good luck (after they've left, mind) in the most insanely melodramatic line of the series up to this point. Emo Ranger attempt? Emo Ranger FAIL.
So the five original rangers teleport to the park in the exact spot the putties kidnapped Tommy last time. Billy's machine is a molecular tracking machine and will follow the path of the molecules of the putties. Or something. It's ridiculous looking and works just like the third gym in Pokemon. Seriously.
Before they can activate it, however, Bulk and Skull climb an insanely steep hill that was never there before and has the most ridiculous sideways plants (seriously, sideways). They taunt the rangers a bit and even Billy tries to get in on the action. Zack gets Bulk to charge straight into a trash can which then rolls down said steep hill and Skull, in a moment of adorable sweetness, goes tumbling after of his own free will. He helps Bulk out of the trash can with great care and concern. Dawwwwww.
Meanwhile, Tommy has another over-dramatic conversation with Zordon about how he knows Jason will save him, except Jason totally won't. Emo Ranger attempt 2, Emo Ranger FAIL 2. He then has to go fight the Cyclops monster all on his very own because the original team mission is too important to pull them away... and the whole Cyclops thing is totally a distraction anyway. Tommy's use of 'git' instead of 'get' really irritated me this scene, but all is forgiven when he says "It's Morphin Time!" because he says it with such unbridled enthusiasm. He's much better at the call than Jason.
So Tommy calls on the DragonZord and fights Cyclops, who has taken the form of the MegaZord. It's mostly just filler, but Cyclops at one point shoots a laser out of his eye and we squee like the hopeless fangirls we are. If only it had been red...
Anyway, back at the park, Billy gets his invention all lined up, they activate it, and Jason goes through. Alas, he finds Goldar guarding the Green Candle which sparks ominously. They have a bit of a fight and really, we think Goldar just wants to grope Jason inappropriately. Jason may not be entirely against this because, well, he doesn't even try to morph... he just kind of dances around.
I'm curious here, though. The portal closed behind him so how is he supposed to get back? When the scene goes back to the park, the others are just standing around with inactive poles of whatever it is that Billy invented. And they expect Jason to come back how? I don't even know, but they have to reactivate it so Zack can go through and rescue his boyfriend because Jason is taking way too long to just grab a candle and run. Zack tells Jason they have the choice of getting the candle and saving Tommy's powers, or going back and fighting to save Tommy's life. Goldar just... lets them go? What? I don't... what? He lets them choose and just... walk out. Um... FAIL!
The original five morph and join the battle. They immediately summon Titanus to form the UltraZord, knock out Cyclops, and then teleport to... the Command Center? What? Why not just go back to the park to go through the portal to get the candle? I don't even know.
But it doesn't matter because mid-fight the candle burnt out anyway. Tommy is still morphed, however. The candle, tied to his POWERS, is burnt OUT and Tommy is STILL a ranger. Zordon convinces Tommy to surrender his power coin to Jason as it's apparently the only way to save himself. Jason then acquires the gold foamy-looking shield and Dragon Dagger. And Tommy is STILL MORPHED. What the hell, show? No really? You've driven me to foul language, show, and that just saddens me. So the POWER that was supposed to be GONE when the candle BURNT OUT is now with Jason. And it doesn't go away and it doesn't turn him evil and it doesn't do anything. And Tommy, finally, force demorphs. It's about damn time. He attempts to be Emo Ranger again and, because he desperately needs some acting lessons, FAILS yet again. Attempt and fail 3.
About one day later, Kim finds Tommy in the park. Tommy is showing off some of his moves, per usual. They have a very sad and emotional (Emo Ranger attempt 4, Emo Ranger FAIL 4) conversation in which we discover everybody misses Tommy a lot. Kim especially misses him. Uh, guys? It's been, like, a day. You go to the same school. You have ALL the same classes (as it's not like his schedule changed as soon as he lost his power or anything). HOW IN THE WORLD can you miss him THAT much???
Tommy is overcome with emotion. He leans in, kisses Kimberly in the first on-the-lips-intended-for-romance kiss of the show, and then they act all happy and relieved. He asks her to the dance, she freaks him out by turning away, and then says of course she will. It's just painful to watch.
List time!
Fish: 5. FIVE fish. We gave it five because that's our max limit, but really this episode deserved 87.
No Billy speak
Nobody covered in food either, though Bulk ends up rolling down a hill in a trash can.
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
Episode 34 - The Green Candle - Part 1
I am back from Dragon*con! I'm sorry for missing Saturday's recap, but I was busy having a fabulous time at the con. I went to a lot of panels including one where I talked about writing power rangers porn, and I did some shopping including buying two seasons of Power Rangers and basically I had a wonderful time. But now I am home, and mostly recovered, and it is time for a recap!
I've got to say, watching Power Rangers on the tv is so much better than watching it on youtube. Anyway, we open with Tommy and Zack sparring. Tommy is wearing the universe's most ridiculous shirt, although it is way better than some of his other outfits, and Zack has on those purple pants again. For some reason, Zack is encouraging Tommy to ask out Kimberly. Doesn't he know what will happen to her personality? And also, wait, they seriously aren't dating yet? Huh. (Also, the board that Tommy breaks during this conversation was clearly already broken.)
Meanwhile, on the moon, Rita has a new plan to defeat the Power Rangers. Or at least get rid of Tommy. Apparently she has a candle made out of magic wax that will make him join her forever! She pulls out a tiny version of her wand and places it over a map of something that is definitely not California (seriously, Angel Grove is its own country) and tells it to locate Tommy.
While Rita is discussing her plans, Tommy is failing at sparring. Zack's cunning plan was to distract Tommy with thoughts of Kimberly! Tommy tells Zack that if it is so easy to ask someone out, why doesn't he try. Zack tries to impress Angela, and gets shot down, and I laugh a lot. Not that I'd be able to resist Zack. Oh, Zack, you can dance for me any time.
Bulk and Skull make fun of Tommy and Zack, reciting bad poetry about how no girl would ever go out with them. Then there is supposed wackiness that involves Bulk and Skull falling over and Zack and Tommy laugh at them, but seriously, why is it not season 2 yet so we can get some character development for those two?
Kimberly and Tommy are walking through the park. Tommy has changed shirts, but now the green of the shirt clashes with the green of his pants, so I'm not sure this is an improvement. Kim has a leotard on under her dress. (Look, there were some awesome cosplayers at the con, I am in a pay attention to the clothing type of place.) Tommy has just started to ask Kim a question, after a really awkward "Can I ask you a question?" "You can ask me anything, we're friends, right?" type conversation, when putties show up. Yay for cockblocking putties! As long as the one being cockblocked is Tommy, anyway.
There is a seriously awesome unmorphed fight scene, except somehow Kim's morpher gets dropped. Goldar shows up and takes Tommy to the dark dimension, and seriously, Kimberly is right there and has been separated from her morpher, and they just leave her? I know Rita is obsessed with Tommy, but I thought the point was to try and get rid of all the Rangers eventually. Evil is seriously dumb.
So Tommy is trapped in the Dark Dimension, with Kimberly still in the park screaming for Tommy, and Rita has apparently had Finster create a monster called Cyclops. I am really sad that it isn't Scott Summers. (You have no idea how badly I want the Power Rangers to fight the X-Men. I totally wrote a ridiculous AU fanfic where Billy and Kimberly turned out to be mutants when I was 11. It was awesome.) Instead the monster is a shape shifter with one eye. Not nearly as coolor as hardcore as Scott Summers.
After Tommy has been kidnapped, Zordon apparently managed to pay attention and the original five Rangers are in the Command Center, trying to locate the Dark Dimension. Seriously, didn't they manage to locate it during the Green With Evil Saga? Serious Zordon Fail.
Anyway, as they try to come up with a plan, the Dragon Zord starts attacking Angel Grove. Of course, since we were just told that Rita had a shape shifting monster 30 seconds ago, it is clearly not the Dragon Zord. Plus, Zordon says that it doesn't appear to be the Zord.
Tommy and Goldar are fighting, and there isn't nearly as much inappropriate Goldar/Tommy subtext as there is Goldar/Jason. Goldar has to go leave for some reason, so he uses the worst special effects ever to bind Tommy's hands, and Tommy just stands there, because apparently if your hands are in shackles you can't move at all or try to blow out the damn candle or whatever. (They keep stressing that when the candle burns down Tommy will work for Rita. Now, if they mean that the candle has to go out, that is one thing. But why not just blow out the damn candle so it doesn't burn down? Or else be more clear. Seriously, episode.) Tommy is seriously useless.
The other Rangers summon the Zords in the longest sequence ever, and my roommate walks into the room and says "Look! It's Voltron!" and then I miss most of the fight scene to try and explain the difference.
Goldar comes back and Tommy manages to steal his sword and teleport back to the park. Seriously? How does he know how to use that magic? I don't even know what is with that. Tommy tries to call his zord, but apparently his powers are weakening already or something. They don't quite defeat the Cyclops, because it will totally be back next episode. Whatever.
At the Command Center, Alpha is scanning Tommy, because apparently you can be damaged crossing dimensions. Did they scan Jason when he came back from the Dark Dimension? I'm pretty sure they did not. Jason remembers Rita's Dark Dimension as being a bad place, and I cannot stop giggling. There's a bullshit explanation for how the candle works, but basically Tommy touched the wax or something while he worked for Rita and that is how they are going to make him evil again. Everyone is very sad, and they're going to have to get the candle back.
To be continued, but not until tomorrow.
Fish: 3.5. It isn't quite as out there, but the logic about how the candle works, and leaving Kim behind like that is pretty bad.
Billy speak: "He's scanning Tommy for internal damage due to crossing dimensions."
Nobody gets covered in food, but Bulk nearly chokes on his own jacket. I don't even know.
I've got to say, watching Power Rangers on the tv is so much better than watching it on youtube. Anyway, we open with Tommy and Zack sparring. Tommy is wearing the universe's most ridiculous shirt, although it is way better than some of his other outfits, and Zack has on those purple pants again. For some reason, Zack is encouraging Tommy to ask out Kimberly. Doesn't he know what will happen to her personality? And also, wait, they seriously aren't dating yet? Huh. (Also, the board that Tommy breaks during this conversation was clearly already broken.)
Meanwhile, on the moon, Rita has a new plan to defeat the Power Rangers. Or at least get rid of Tommy. Apparently she has a candle made out of magic wax that will make him join her forever! She pulls out a tiny version of her wand and places it over a map of something that is definitely not California (seriously, Angel Grove is its own country) and tells it to locate Tommy.
While Rita is discussing her plans, Tommy is failing at sparring. Zack's cunning plan was to distract Tommy with thoughts of Kimberly! Tommy tells Zack that if it is so easy to ask someone out, why doesn't he try. Zack tries to impress Angela, and gets shot down, and I laugh a lot. Not that I'd be able to resist Zack. Oh, Zack, you can dance for me any time.
Bulk and Skull make fun of Tommy and Zack, reciting bad poetry about how no girl would ever go out with them. Then there is supposed wackiness that involves Bulk and Skull falling over and Zack and Tommy laugh at them, but seriously, why is it not season 2 yet so we can get some character development for those two?
Kimberly and Tommy are walking through the park. Tommy has changed shirts, but now the green of the shirt clashes with the green of his pants, so I'm not sure this is an improvement. Kim has a leotard on under her dress. (Look, there were some awesome cosplayers at the con, I am in a pay attention to the clothing type of place.) Tommy has just started to ask Kim a question, after a really awkward "Can I ask you a question?" "You can ask me anything, we're friends, right?" type conversation, when putties show up. Yay for cockblocking putties! As long as the one being cockblocked is Tommy, anyway.
There is a seriously awesome unmorphed fight scene, except somehow Kim's morpher gets dropped. Goldar shows up and takes Tommy to the dark dimension, and seriously, Kimberly is right there and has been separated from her morpher, and they just leave her? I know Rita is obsessed with Tommy, but I thought the point was to try and get rid of all the Rangers eventually. Evil is seriously dumb.
So Tommy is trapped in the Dark Dimension, with Kimberly still in the park screaming for Tommy, and Rita has apparently had Finster create a monster called Cyclops. I am really sad that it isn't Scott Summers. (You have no idea how badly I want the Power Rangers to fight the X-Men. I totally wrote a ridiculous AU fanfic where Billy and Kimberly turned out to be mutants when I was 11. It was awesome.) Instead the monster is a shape shifter with one eye. Not nearly as cool
After Tommy has been kidnapped, Zordon apparently managed to pay attention and the original five Rangers are in the Command Center, trying to locate the Dark Dimension. Seriously, didn't they manage to locate it during the Green With Evil Saga? Serious Zordon Fail.
Anyway, as they try to come up with a plan, the Dragon Zord starts attacking Angel Grove. Of course, since we were just told that Rita had a shape shifting monster 30 seconds ago, it is clearly not the Dragon Zord. Plus, Zordon says that it doesn't appear to be the Zord.
Tommy and Goldar are fighting, and there isn't nearly as much inappropriate Goldar/Tommy subtext as there is Goldar/Jason. Goldar has to go leave for some reason, so he uses the worst special effects ever to bind Tommy's hands, and Tommy just stands there, because apparently if your hands are in shackles you can't move at all or try to blow out the damn candle or whatever. (They keep stressing that when the candle burns down Tommy will work for Rita. Now, if they mean that the candle has to go out, that is one thing. But why not just blow out the damn candle so it doesn't burn down? Or else be more clear. Seriously, episode.) Tommy is seriously useless.
The other Rangers summon the Zords in the longest sequence ever, and my roommate walks into the room and says "Look! It's Voltron!" and then I miss most of the fight scene to try and explain the difference.
Goldar comes back and Tommy manages to steal his sword and teleport back to the park. Seriously? How does he know how to use that magic? I don't even know what is with that. Tommy tries to call his zord, but apparently his powers are weakening already or something. They don't quite defeat the Cyclops, because it will totally be back next episode. Whatever.
At the Command Center, Alpha is scanning Tommy, because apparently you can be damaged crossing dimensions. Did they scan Jason when he came back from the Dark Dimension? I'm pretty sure they did not. Jason remembers Rita's Dark Dimension as being a bad place, and I cannot stop giggling. There's a bullshit explanation for how the candle works, but basically Tommy touched the wax or something while he worked for Rita and that is how they are going to make him evil again. Everyone is very sad, and they're going to have to get the candle back.
To be continued, but not until tomorrow.
Fish: 3.5. It isn't quite as out there, but the logic about how the candle works, and leaving Kim behind like that is pretty bad.
Billy speak: "He's scanning Tommy for internal damage due to crossing dimensions."
Nobody gets covered in food, but Bulk nearly chokes on his own jacket. I don't even know.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Dragon*Con Update
Since TSB is off at Dragon*Con this weekend, there won't be a recap today. The next recap will go up next week, possibly as late as Thursday, 10th of September. It depends on when TSB gets back and catches up on life.
But, never fear! We still have a post today. In honor of Sterling Knight, one of the many genetic experiments from the Disney farm, being a Power Rangers fan, we give you our dream casting for the inevitable Disney Mighty Morphin Power Rangers Reboot. (Okay, we actually asked TSB's BFFs at Tweenage Wasteland for help, and they offered a lot of suggestions. Also, thanks to lj user jedinewsie")
Zack: Dances while doing a completely unrelated sport and looks really good without a shirt? Look, there's only one Disney star who pulls all of those off, and that is the ever fabulous Corbin Bleu.
Another possible option for Zack is Chris Warren Jr. What say you?
Kimberly: The initial suggestion was Demi Lovato (and queenriley is very sad that she knew how to spell that without having to look it up), followed by Selena Gomez. Neither of those suggestions really worked, so then we thought of Jennette McCurdy and her awesome hair. However, the best suggestion is Ashley Tisdale, who has proven that she can work valley girl like nobody else, but still have a major heart.
Billy: We're going to give this one to Sterling Knight, because he totally needs to be in this, considering he loves the show. And also we can't think of anyone else. Plus, he's totally adorkable and nerdy, so he does work for Billy.
Trini: Brenda Song. She is awesome and has a black belt. Automatic in.
Jason: David Henrie! This one was actually the hardest one to cast, until queenriley pointed out that David Henrie is actually really built, and then we were both disturbed, but since he has really nice arms, he can be Jason. (queenriley says: He looks all small and normal until he takes off his shirt and then, BAM! Wow! It's a little freakish, actually, how nice his arms really are. So distracting... oh yeah, totally Jason)
Tommy: Zac Efron. Troy Bolton and Tommy Oliver were clearly separated at birth.
Bulk: Andrew Caldwell, the guy who plays Thor from Hannah Montana. He was born for this role. Plus, he totally plays well off Jason Earles (see below). Those two have genius comedic timing.
Skull: In the tradition of Skull having serious acting chops, we're going for the "how the hell is he older than the both of us, no really", amazingness of Jason Earles. Who also has decent chemistry with the guy we've cast as Bulk (see above). (queenriley says: and besides, I found/find Jason Narvy totally adorkably hot, and I find Jason Earles totally adorkable, so it works for me.)
Rita: The mom from Suite Life, Kim Rhodes (queenriley says= Yay! I actually had to look something up for this post, finally!). She's pretty great at acting shrill and being exasperated because of annoying teenagers.
We'd like to make a point that we have purposefully left out all three of the Jonii and both Cyrus "actors". There will be no Jonii in this and I (being queenriley) wouldn't want either Miley or Billy Ray to even LOOK at this askew. Keep them away. *hiss* (second_batgirl does not have as much of an objection to Miley Cyrus, mostly because she really wants the inevitable crossover where it turns out that Miley Cyrus is a mutant. Look, the writer of Cable has been joking about her being the mutant baby, it is totally possible. OTOH, please keep the Jonii FAR away from this.)
It has also been requested that queenriley let it be known that she is a Mean Mom. Having finally watched and caught up on RPM (omg so much love), she spent an hour this afternoon holding the television hostage. The Spawn, being Drama Queen and Emo Kid, were deprived of some of their Saturday cartoons. You see the things I do for Power Rangers, dear readers? The poor traumatized, deprived children. (also, Drama Queen says she might actually want to watch Power Rangers with me if it featured Corbin Bleu... will wonders never cease? ... and yes, that whole paragraph was really just a way to sneak in more Corbin pictures)
But, never fear! We still have a post today. In honor of Sterling Knight, one of the many genetic experiments from the Disney farm, being a Power Rangers fan, we give you our dream casting for the inevitable Disney Mighty Morphin Power Rangers Reboot. (Okay, we actually asked TSB's BFFs at Tweenage Wasteland for help, and they offered a lot of suggestions. Also, thanks to lj user jedinewsie")
Zack: Dances while doing a completely unrelated sport and looks really good without a shirt? Look, there's only one Disney star who pulls all of those off, and that is the ever fabulous Corbin Bleu.
Another possible option for Zack is Chris Warren Jr. What say you?
Kimberly: The initial suggestion was Demi Lovato (and queenriley is very sad that she knew how to spell that without having to look it up), followed by Selena Gomez. Neither of those suggestions really worked, so then we thought of Jennette McCurdy and her awesome hair. However, the best suggestion is Ashley Tisdale, who has proven that she can work valley girl like nobody else, but still have a major heart.
Billy: We're going to give this one to Sterling Knight, because he totally needs to be in this, considering he loves the show. And also we can't think of anyone else. Plus, he's totally adorkable and nerdy, so he does work for Billy.
Trini: Brenda Song. She is awesome and has a black belt. Automatic in.
Jason: David Henrie! This one was actually the hardest one to cast, until queenriley pointed out that David Henrie is actually really built, and then we were both disturbed, but since he has really nice arms, he can be Jason. (queenriley says: He looks all small and normal until he takes off his shirt and then, BAM! Wow! It's a little freakish, actually, how nice his arms really are. So distracting... oh yeah, totally Jason)
Tommy: Zac Efron. Troy Bolton and Tommy Oliver were clearly separated at birth.
Bulk: Andrew Caldwell, the guy who plays Thor from Hannah Montana. He was born for this role. Plus, he totally plays well off Jason Earles (see below). Those two have genius comedic timing.
Skull: In the tradition of Skull having serious acting chops, we're going for the "how the hell is he older than the both of us, no really", amazingness of Jason Earles. Who also has decent chemistry with the guy we've cast as Bulk (see above). (queenriley says: and besides, I found/find Jason Narvy totally adorkably hot, and I find Jason Earles totally adorkable, so it works for me.)
Rita: The mom from Suite Life, Kim Rhodes (queenriley says= Yay! I actually had to look something up for this post, finally!). She's pretty great at acting shrill and being exasperated because of annoying teenagers.
We'd like to make a point that we have purposefully left out all three of the Jonii and both Cyrus "actors". There will be no Jonii in this and I (being queenriley) wouldn't want either Miley or Billy Ray to even LOOK at this askew. Keep them away. *hiss* (second_batgirl does not have as much of an objection to Miley Cyrus, mostly because she really wants the inevitable crossover where it turns out that Miley Cyrus is a mutant. Look, the writer of Cable has been joking about her being the mutant baby, it is totally possible. OTOH, please keep the Jonii FAR away from this.)
It has also been requested that queenriley let it be known that she is a Mean Mom. Having finally watched and caught up on RPM (omg so much love), she spent an hour this afternoon holding the television hostage. The Spawn, being Drama Queen and Emo Kid, were deprived of some of their Saturday cartoons. You see the things I do for Power Rangers, dear readers? The poor traumatized, deprived children. (also, Drama Queen says she might actually want to watch Power Rangers with me if it featured Corbin Bleu... will wonders never cease? ... and yes, that whole paragraph was really just a way to sneak in more Corbin pictures)
Tuesday, September 1, 2009
Episode 33- The Yolk's On You
I'd like to take a moment to thank the lovely ladies at Tweenage Wasteland for bringing this to our attention. It's a video and the point of interest starts about a minute in. Apparently one of the Disney Tweeny Bopper stars grew up watching Power Rangers and he totally geeks out about it. His name is Sterling Knight, which I hope is a stage name, because otherwise... well... did his parents really hope he'd grow up to work in a gay strip club? Seriously? Sterling Knight... of all the things to name your kid. Anyway, I don't know much about him other than he's twenty years old and looks like he's twelve, and he rants about the cast change in season two. And he thinks Tommy is awesome when he's evil and Saba was cool. So there you go. Power Rangers in the mainstream.
As for tonight's episode, well, they probably should have just called it Monsters Addicted to Drugs and been done with it. Instead they bogged it down with this whole superfluous plot about the rangers being in a talent show.
First we see Jason and Tommy walking down a hallway that looks like the hallway outside of the Youth Center. They enter a room that looks suspiciously like the Youth Center. Except a stage has been added. This is apparently the theatre of Angel Grove High. That looks JUST LIKE the Youth Center. And Ernie is there for some reason. They were really short on sets first season, yeah? Anyway, Jason looks as if he's been thoroughly... um... enjoyed by Tommy. Tommy regretfully informs him that he's forgotten their karate belts and must go back and get them so once again, off he runs. Alone. Through the park. This... isn't going to end well, is it?
Meanwhile, Finster creates a monster and sends it to Earth. Rita flips out because she didn't know about it and didn't authorize it. It's okay though! It's Rita's birthday and the monster is Finster's present to her. AWWWWWWW! So freaking adorable.
Tommy runs through the park, alone, and sure enough, it doesn't end well. After doing some random martial arts against the leaves of a tree, Tommy is attacked for real by putties! Four of them! Oh no, whatever will he do! Uh... get beaten, of course. Despite being the best martial artist in all of Angel Grove, he can't handle four putties. He ends up tied up, yet again, by a hanging net with one putty holding his communicator and another holding his morpher. We assume he lost so easily because he's overtired and distracted by having just made hot, manly love to Jason. It's really the only logical explanation.
And here we get to the real meat of the story. The monster, named Fang, is in search of his gooney bird eggs. He needs them, you see. Unfortunately, Squat and Baboo have eaten them all. Fang FLIPS OUT. He goes ballistic and starts yelling and fighting. Goldar tells him the Power Rangers have his eggs and he goes running off looking for his fix.
Back at the talent show that is being held in the not-the-Youth Center, Billy is wearing a cowboy hat (and I am TRAUMATIZED by it I tell you, traumatized) and Bulk and Skull are adorably punk. Principal Caplan yells at them a lot and then the rangers run out to the not-the-Youth-Center-Hallway and answer their communicators. They learn that Tommy is all tied up AGAIN and they have to morph and go fight a monster. I'm wondering why anybody is surprised by Tommy getting tied up by putties anymore. It seems to happen on a fairly regular basis. He really ought to learn to carry a pocketknife or something.
The Rangers try to fight the monster, but Goldar is still there and he blasts them with some fire something and throws them off a cliff. They weren't standing near a cliff, but Angel Grove geography makes no sense and off they go. In Jason's case, twice. Yes, Jason got thrown off the top of the cliff twice. He's just talented like that.
We see Tommy again and he's trying to get out of the net. I was bothered by it earlier, but now I just want to yell. He needs to get himself to his hairstylist. What he's sporting now? It's atrocious. I don't give a rat's tuches about hair and even I know that boy needs some serious help. It's so... distractingly bad.
Rita shows up on Earth and talks to Fang. She promises to get him some eggs if he'll do her bidding and he's going through such withdraw pains right now that he would lick her feet if she told him there was gooney bird egg goo on them. She makes him grown and reveals that he is secretly Wolverine! His adamantium claws grow with him and we squee with delight. Since Batman already exists in the Power Rangers universe, now it is Marvel's turn (which makes sense since Disney just bought Marvel) this totally works. The Rangers call their Zords, wonder where Tommy is, and after what seems to be the longest MegaZord sequence in existence, they attempt to fight Fang. Poor guy just wants his fix, however, and can't stop talking about those darn gooney bird eggs.
Tommy gets out of the net and shows up to the fight, late as usual, and they call Titanus just in time to stop Fang from destroying the dam. Where the dam came from, we don't know. Why they thought Fang wanted to destroy the dam, we also don't know. Fang just wants his gooney bird eggs. This whole mess could have been avoided if they'd just given him some eggs or checked him into rehab. It would have been much easier than summoning three zord combinations and then blowing him up. Which is what they had to do.
Back at the talent show they discuss the fight backstage with Ernie standing right there. Secret identity FAIL, Rangers! Anyway, Tommy and Jason do some coordinated martial arts and everybody oohs and aahs as if they've never seen Jason and Tommy do martial arts before. They walk off stage with Tommy's arm around Jason's waist. Luckily Zack doesn't seem to mind. Perhaps he's moved on. Bulk and Skull get a turn next. They do a pretty decent punk routine, and I actually really liked it, but the rest of the audience... doesn't. Surprise surprise. Kimberly claps for them, at least.
Overall, this was a pretty consistent episode! Only 2 fish for this one.
List time:
covered in food- Nobody!
Billy speak- none, but at least he didn't sing country *shudder*, so I can live without the Billy speak.
As for tonight's episode, well, they probably should have just called it Monsters Addicted to Drugs and been done with it. Instead they bogged it down with this whole superfluous plot about the rangers being in a talent show.
First we see Jason and Tommy walking down a hallway that looks like the hallway outside of the Youth Center. They enter a room that looks suspiciously like the Youth Center. Except a stage has been added. This is apparently the theatre of Angel Grove High. That looks JUST LIKE the Youth Center. And Ernie is there for some reason. They were really short on sets first season, yeah? Anyway, Jason looks as if he's been thoroughly... um... enjoyed by Tommy. Tommy regretfully informs him that he's forgotten their karate belts and must go back and get them so once again, off he runs. Alone. Through the park. This... isn't going to end well, is it?
Meanwhile, Finster creates a monster and sends it to Earth. Rita flips out because she didn't know about it and didn't authorize it. It's okay though! It's Rita's birthday and the monster is Finster's present to her. AWWWWWWW! So freaking adorable.
Tommy runs through the park, alone, and sure enough, it doesn't end well. After doing some random martial arts against the leaves of a tree, Tommy is attacked for real by putties! Four of them! Oh no, whatever will he do! Uh... get beaten, of course. Despite being the best martial artist in all of Angel Grove, he can't handle four putties. He ends up tied up, yet again, by a hanging net with one putty holding his communicator and another holding his morpher. We assume he lost so easily because he's overtired and distracted by having just made hot, manly love to Jason. It's really the only logical explanation.
And here we get to the real meat of the story. The monster, named Fang, is in search of his gooney bird eggs. He needs them, you see. Unfortunately, Squat and Baboo have eaten them all. Fang FLIPS OUT. He goes ballistic and starts yelling and fighting. Goldar tells him the Power Rangers have his eggs and he goes running off looking for his fix.
Back at the talent show that is being held in the not-the-Youth Center, Billy is wearing a cowboy hat (and I am TRAUMATIZED by it I tell you, traumatized) and Bulk and Skull are adorably punk. Principal Caplan yells at them a lot and then the rangers run out to the not-the-Youth-Center-Hallway and answer their communicators. They learn that Tommy is all tied up AGAIN and they have to morph and go fight a monster. I'm wondering why anybody is surprised by Tommy getting tied up by putties anymore. It seems to happen on a fairly regular basis. He really ought to learn to carry a pocketknife or something.
The Rangers try to fight the monster, but Goldar is still there and he blasts them with some fire something and throws them off a cliff. They weren't standing near a cliff, but Angel Grove geography makes no sense and off they go. In Jason's case, twice. Yes, Jason got thrown off the top of the cliff twice. He's just talented like that.
We see Tommy again and he's trying to get out of the net. I was bothered by it earlier, but now I just want to yell. He needs to get himself to his hairstylist. What he's sporting now? It's atrocious. I don't give a rat's tuches about hair and even I know that boy needs some serious help. It's so... distractingly bad.
Rita shows up on Earth and talks to Fang. She promises to get him some eggs if he'll do her bidding and he's going through such withdraw pains right now that he would lick her feet if she told him there was gooney bird egg goo on them. She makes him grown and reveals that he is secretly Wolverine! His adamantium claws grow with him and we squee with delight. Since Batman already exists in the Power Rangers universe, now it is Marvel's turn (which makes sense since Disney just bought Marvel) this totally works. The Rangers call their Zords, wonder where Tommy is, and after what seems to be the longest MegaZord sequence in existence, they attempt to fight Fang. Poor guy just wants his fix, however, and can't stop talking about those darn gooney bird eggs.
Tommy gets out of the net and shows up to the fight, late as usual, and they call Titanus just in time to stop Fang from destroying the dam. Where the dam came from, we don't know. Why they thought Fang wanted to destroy the dam, we also don't know. Fang just wants his gooney bird eggs. This whole mess could have been avoided if they'd just given him some eggs or checked him into rehab. It would have been much easier than summoning three zord combinations and then blowing him up. Which is what they had to do.
Back at the talent show they discuss the fight backstage with Ernie standing right there. Secret identity FAIL, Rangers! Anyway, Tommy and Jason do some coordinated martial arts and everybody oohs and aahs as if they've never seen Jason and Tommy do martial arts before. They walk off stage with Tommy's arm around Jason's waist. Luckily Zack doesn't seem to mind. Perhaps he's moved on. Bulk and Skull get a turn next. They do a pretty decent punk routine, and I actually really liked it, but the rest of the audience... doesn't. Surprise surprise. Kimberly claps for them, at least.
Overall, this was a pretty consistent episode! Only 2 fish for this one.
List time:
covered in food- Nobody!
Billy speak- none, but at least he didn't sing country *shudder*, so I can live without the Billy speak.
Saturday, August 29, 2009
Episode 32 - A Star Is Born
The today on Power Rangers pretty much boils down to Tommy is scary and Scorpina is awesome. We are clearly in for a great episode
We open at Angel Grove High School, where Kimberly is asking Tommy if he's going to go to the beach with them the next day. Kimberly, sweetie, if you want to make out with him, stop inviting him to group events. Tommy says no, because he's going to try out for a karate commercial. Oh, Tommy. Don't you realize that commercials only lead to becoming a MMA fighter with a lot of scary tattoos? Why do you do this to us?
Zack is wearing red pants. Apparently Ranger Rule #23 (thanks foxtree!) is in effect. Kimberly just looks ridiculous, but she gets a better outfit later. (Trini has the best clothes this episode. We're not sure what alternate reality we've landed in.)
Bulk and Skull come wandering down the hallway. Apparently Bulk is also trying out for the commercial, with Skull as his manager. We're sure this is going to end well. Really. Tommy takes the opportunity to show off his martial arts skills, and seriously, how has he not been expelled for fighting in the hallway? I know Angel Grove only has one teacher and the principal, but O.o I used to teach high school, and if one of my students had been doing karate in the hallway, they'd be in for a world of trouble.
At the beach (so this is the next day, right? And Tommy couldn't go with them because he's going to the commercial thing?) the Rangers are all playing volleyball. Bulk and Skull show up so that Bulk can try to get a tan, and Skull starts rubbing suntan lotion on Bulk. (Apparently they are Cable & Deadpool, and you have no idea how hard I'm kicking myself that I don't have a scan of the sunscreen incident available.) Anyway, the sunscreen goes everywhere, so Skull ends up covering Bulk in mayonnaise. OW.
Later, at the auditions (which should be at the same time as the beach thing) Bulk shows up with the worst sunburn ever. I've officially lost the episode's timeline, and that isn't even trying to figure out how old the Rangers are supposed to be. The auditions are at the high school, so revieloutionne's theory that the Angel Grove economy runs on martial arts is totally true. Bulk makes a giant fool out of himself at the audition.
Rita is apparently fed up with everything, so she decides to take a day off and let Goldar run things. Goldar sends Scorpina down to harass the volleyball playing Rangers at the beach. Two seconds before the beach was filled with civilians, but the Rangers morph anyway. Worst secret identities ever! (Queenriley started flailing again about how Trini grabbed Billy's arm, so if I get any details wrong, that is totally why. I'll return the favor as soon as we get to any episodes that have Adam.)
Scorpina apparently has a pet worm that immediately envelops the Rangers in a silk cocoon. Zordon was paying attention for once, and he tried to call Tommy. However, Tommy had taken off his communicator for the audition, so he doesn't hear it. His audition is pretty awesome. Tommy has skills. Also, the two women who are running the audition clearly want to sleep with him, and my chat with Queenriley pretty much deteriorated into all caps yelling about how he is still in high school and they are supposed to be professional adults and why are they looking at him like that?
Meanwhile, Goldar and Scorpina are doing a great job kicking the Rangers asses, and they dump the giant cocoon off a cliff, even though they were at the sandy edge of the beach two seconds ago. Angel Grove geography makes no sense.
The Rangers do manage to rescue themselves, which is awesome. They shoot their laser guns at the walls of the cocoon and get out. Now, if the villains had thought it out, the walls would have reflected their blasters back at them and they would have all shot themselves. Also, doesn't Jason have a sword?
The monster of the week (well, the first one) is named Babe Ruthless.
Let's just take a minute to ponder that. BABE RUTHLESS. I honestly cannot believe they went there. Also, you would think they would save that monster for a baseball themed episode! We were so busy being baffled by the name that we almost missed that Tommy answered his communicator in the middle of the hall that is randomly devoid of people, even though there were plenty of other people auditioning.
He morphs and goes to help out the Rangers, and they form the MegaDragonzord or the Dragonzord in Fighting Mode, and I don't even know, they use both terms, and what follows is seriously the most confusing Zord fight ever. Somehow Jason is piloting his own zord and he's in the cockpit of the MegaDragonzord? We determine that clearly FISH are piloting Jason's zord. They beat Babe Ruthless and then Scorpina shows back up with her worm which is also now giant and for some reason they go back to the regular Megazord and Tommy has returned his Zord to the ocean? We're guessing Tommy had a hair appointment or something. The Megazord gets trapped in another giant cocoon and the dragonzord cuts them out with its tail, and there's a convenient blank spot in the middle of the city for the cocoon to fall without crushing anything.
Anyway, there was a lot of fighting and we're done trying to explain it. Lots of fish in that fight. Rita yells at Goldar for screwing it up, and Goldar promptly blames Finster's monsters for sucking. Poor Finster. He's too awesome for this.
Back at the Juice Bar, one day later. The Rangers are all watching the Random Reporter Guy (who we're going to have to make a tag for, we guess) talk about how awesome they are. Apparently there was property damage! We're amazed they admit it. Ernie also goes on about how awesome they are.
Then the commercial airs. Bulk is the before, and Tommy is the after. Apparently they just used the audition footage? So we're guessing the Angel Grove Karate Center is in the actual school? And how did the commercial go up so quickly? Did they ever sign a contract? And how did they not get sued by Bulk's family?
Lists:
Fish: 4.5. Four for the ridiculous zord fight, and another half for the sheer WTF of the commercial
Covered in food: Bulk gets covered in mayonnaise.
Questions: So, why didn't Jason try out for the commercial? Did he and Tommy flip a coin or something?
We open at Angel Grove High School, where Kimberly is asking Tommy if he's going to go to the beach with them the next day. Kimberly, sweetie, if you want to make out with him, stop inviting him to group events. Tommy says no, because he's going to try out for a karate commercial. Oh, Tommy. Don't you realize that commercials only lead to becoming a MMA fighter with a lot of scary tattoos? Why do you do this to us?
Zack is wearing red pants. Apparently Ranger Rule #23 (thanks foxtree!) is in effect. Kimberly just looks ridiculous, but she gets a better outfit later. (Trini has the best clothes this episode. We're not sure what alternate reality we've landed in.)
Bulk and Skull come wandering down the hallway. Apparently Bulk is also trying out for the commercial, with Skull as his manager. We're sure this is going to end well. Really. Tommy takes the opportunity to show off his martial arts skills, and seriously, how has he not been expelled for fighting in the hallway? I know Angel Grove only has one teacher and the principal, but O.o I used to teach high school, and if one of my students had been doing karate in the hallway, they'd be in for a world of trouble.
At the beach (so this is the next day, right? And Tommy couldn't go with them because he's going to the commercial thing?) the Rangers are all playing volleyball. Bulk and Skull show up so that Bulk can try to get a tan, and Skull starts rubbing suntan lotion on Bulk. (Apparently they are Cable & Deadpool, and you have no idea how hard I'm kicking myself that I don't have a scan of the sunscreen incident available.) Anyway, the sunscreen goes everywhere, so Skull ends up covering Bulk in mayonnaise. OW.
Later, at the auditions (which should be at the same time as the beach thing) Bulk shows up with the worst sunburn ever. I've officially lost the episode's timeline, and that isn't even trying to figure out how old the Rangers are supposed to be. The auditions are at the high school, so revieloutionne's theory that the Angel Grove economy runs on martial arts is totally true. Bulk makes a giant fool out of himself at the audition.
Rita is apparently fed up with everything, so she decides to take a day off and let Goldar run things. Goldar sends Scorpina down to harass the volleyball playing Rangers at the beach. Two seconds before the beach was filled with civilians, but the Rangers morph anyway. Worst secret identities ever! (Queenriley started flailing again about how Trini grabbed Billy's arm, so if I get any details wrong, that is totally why. I'll return the favor as soon as we get to any episodes that have Adam.)
Scorpina apparently has a pet worm that immediately envelops the Rangers in a silk cocoon. Zordon was paying attention for once, and he tried to call Tommy. However, Tommy had taken off his communicator for the audition, so he doesn't hear it. His audition is pretty awesome. Tommy has skills. Also, the two women who are running the audition clearly want to sleep with him, and my chat with Queenriley pretty much deteriorated into all caps yelling about how he is still in high school and they are supposed to be professional adults and why are they looking at him like that?
Meanwhile, Goldar and Scorpina are doing a great job kicking the Rangers asses, and they dump the giant cocoon off a cliff, even though they were at the sandy edge of the beach two seconds ago. Angel Grove geography makes no sense.
The Rangers do manage to rescue themselves, which is awesome. They shoot their laser guns at the walls of the cocoon and get out. Now, if the villains had thought it out, the walls would have reflected their blasters back at them and they would have all shot themselves. Also, doesn't Jason have a sword?
The monster of the week (well, the first one) is named Babe Ruthless.
Let's just take a minute to ponder that. BABE RUTHLESS. I honestly cannot believe they went there. Also, you would think they would save that monster for a baseball themed episode! We were so busy being baffled by the name that we almost missed that Tommy answered his communicator in the middle of the hall that is randomly devoid of people, even though there were plenty of other people auditioning.
He morphs and goes to help out the Rangers, and they form the MegaDragonzord or the Dragonzord in Fighting Mode, and I don't even know, they use both terms, and what follows is seriously the most confusing Zord fight ever. Somehow Jason is piloting his own zord and he's in the cockpit of the MegaDragonzord? We determine that clearly FISH are piloting Jason's zord. They beat Babe Ruthless and then Scorpina shows back up with her worm which is also now giant and for some reason they go back to the regular Megazord and Tommy has returned his Zord to the ocean? We're guessing Tommy had a hair appointment or something. The Megazord gets trapped in another giant cocoon and the dragonzord cuts them out with its tail, and there's a convenient blank spot in the middle of the city for the cocoon to fall without crushing anything.
Anyway, there was a lot of fighting and we're done trying to explain it. Lots of fish in that fight. Rita yells at Goldar for screwing it up, and Goldar promptly blames Finster's monsters for sucking. Poor Finster. He's too awesome for this.
Back at the Juice Bar, one day later. The Rangers are all watching the Random Reporter Guy (who we're going to have to make a tag for, we guess) talk about how awesome they are. Apparently there was property damage! We're amazed they admit it. Ernie also goes on about how awesome they are.
Then the commercial airs. Bulk is the before, and Tommy is the after. Apparently they just used the audition footage? So we're guessing the Angel Grove Karate Center is in the actual school? And how did the commercial go up so quickly? Did they ever sign a contract? And how did they not get sued by Bulk's family?
Lists:
Fish: 4.5. Four for the ridiculous zord fight, and another half for the sheer WTF of the commercial
Covered in food: Bulk gets covered in mayonnaise.
Questions: So, why didn't Jason try out for the commercial? Did he and Tommy flip a coin or something?
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
Episode 31- Calamity Kimberly
Well I have my beers all settled here beside me and I'm ready to start this episode. It's not one of my favourites, never has been. Thank you, Mr. Guinness, for helping me get through it.
We start off in a ginormous bedroom. I've never seen master bedrooms this big, nevermind second bedrooms. It's also decorated like a hotel from the 1950's. This is definitely not a teenagers bedroom.
Kim doesn't want to get up with the alarm and manages to break her lamp and then fall out of bed while trying to turn it off. She is horrified by her bad hair and I just want to point her to the shower and tell her about this magical thing called water and shampoo. It gets rid of bed head! Fantastic invention, that.
The day turns out rainy and she breaks a mirror. Meanwhile, Rita is stalking the rangers again and thinks now would be a good time to go after Kim, since she's having a bad day and all.
At school, Kim's umbrella has broken so she's soaking wet and she got mud all over her pep rally plans. I was unaware there were planning stages to pep rallies, but then, I never attended them myself, choosing to hide in the theater or library instead. Kim's worried Tommy won't find her attractive and I can't say I've ever met a straight man that didn't like seeing hot young women in wet clothing. Just saying, is all.
Bulk and Skull tease her a little and Tommy tells them to stop. Bulk teases him instead and Tommy pushes Bulk onto a wet floor, sends him sliding through dirty mop water, and then throws him into the mop bucket. Tommy actually planned this, taking in where the spilled mop water and bucket were and then positioning himself to throw Bulk in there. That was HORRIBLE and far worse bullying than calling Tommy a name.
Everybody laughs, however, and then Tommy sets up a date with Kim for after school. They meet at a surprisingly dry park (no mud, dry wooden picnic tables, does nothing hold water in Angel Grove?) and just when Tommy manages to make Kim feel a little better, she trips and he has to catch her. I suspect we're supposed to find this romantic. I just find it annoying.
Rita sends down the Samurai Fan Man to capture Kim in his unbreakable bottle and transport her to an alternate dimension. He manages to suck her in and the wind knocks Tommy out in the process. I don't know how, it just did. Meanwhile, trapped in the jug, Kimberly spends the next however long screaming Tommy's name. And so it begins.
Zordon, in another moment of Epic Win, was actually paying attention this time. He calls Jason, who answers his communicator in the middle of the Youth Center, and tells them to teleport immediately. Jason and Zack stop girl-fighting and they all teleport just outside the main entrance to the Youth Center. There is a very convenient lounge chair in the middle of the Command Center and Alpha teleports Tommy directly onto it. Apparently he has a concussion or something.
They share a bit of the most awkward dialogue EVER in existence and Jason unenthusiastically says "It's Morph... oh whatever, you know the rest." Well, okay, technically he said "It's Morphin Time." but it might as well have been "whatever" for all the feeling he put into it.
They go after the Samurai Fan Man at the Putty Patrol Restaurant which we have never heard of and will never hear of again. Alas, too bad, it looked like a fun place to hang out. They get blown away by the Fan Man, however, and Alpha reverses their teleportation direction. Wha??? I'm lost.
The only cool thing about this fight is we get to see Giant Goldar take on all the Zords individually. That was awesome. But it fails because the Fan Man is there and somehow beats the crap out of them. With his fan. Tommy is somehow roused from his groaning, concussed state and insists on morphing to help, but DragonZord gets blown away too. They call on Titanus, manage to break open the unbreakable jar, set Kimberly free, form the UltraZord, and then... win the fight pretty much instantly.
Back at Billy's garage, which is apparently the happening place to be since they all spend so much time there, Billy is covered in grease and working on the RadBug. The others are hanging out inside his garage and watching an old television. Mr. Reporter Guy starts a story on Who Are the Power Rangers and Kim reveals she is secretly Jubilee by blowing up the television. Everybody laughs. The end.
List time:
Covered in food? Nobody
Billy Speak? None
Fish? 3.5 for being more boring than anything else
Beers consumed to get me through it? 2.5
We start off in a ginormous bedroom. I've never seen master bedrooms this big, nevermind second bedrooms. It's also decorated like a hotel from the 1950's. This is definitely not a teenagers bedroom.
Kim doesn't want to get up with the alarm and manages to break her lamp and then fall out of bed while trying to turn it off. She is horrified by her bad hair and I just want to point her to the shower and tell her about this magical thing called water and shampoo. It gets rid of bed head! Fantastic invention, that.
The day turns out rainy and she breaks a mirror. Meanwhile, Rita is stalking the rangers again and thinks now would be a good time to go after Kim, since she's having a bad day and all.
At school, Kim's umbrella has broken so she's soaking wet and she got mud all over her pep rally plans. I was unaware there were planning stages to pep rallies, but then, I never attended them myself, choosing to hide in the theater or library instead. Kim's worried Tommy won't find her attractive and I can't say I've ever met a straight man that didn't like seeing hot young women in wet clothing. Just saying, is all.
Bulk and Skull tease her a little and Tommy tells them to stop. Bulk teases him instead and Tommy pushes Bulk onto a wet floor, sends him sliding through dirty mop water, and then throws him into the mop bucket. Tommy actually planned this, taking in where the spilled mop water and bucket were and then positioning himself to throw Bulk in there. That was HORRIBLE and far worse bullying than calling Tommy a name.
Everybody laughs, however, and then Tommy sets up a date with Kim for after school. They meet at a surprisingly dry park (no mud, dry wooden picnic tables, does nothing hold water in Angel Grove?) and just when Tommy manages to make Kim feel a little better, she trips and he has to catch her. I suspect we're supposed to find this romantic. I just find it annoying.
Rita sends down the Samurai Fan Man to capture Kim in his unbreakable bottle and transport her to an alternate dimension. He manages to suck her in and the wind knocks Tommy out in the process. I don't know how, it just did. Meanwhile, trapped in the jug, Kimberly spends the next however long screaming Tommy's name. And so it begins.
Zordon, in another moment of Epic Win, was actually paying attention this time. He calls Jason, who answers his communicator in the middle of the Youth Center, and tells them to teleport immediately. Jason and Zack stop girl-fighting and they all teleport just outside the main entrance to the Youth Center. There is a very convenient lounge chair in the middle of the Command Center and Alpha teleports Tommy directly onto it. Apparently he has a concussion or something.
They share a bit of the most awkward dialogue EVER in existence and Jason unenthusiastically says "It's Morph... oh whatever, you know the rest." Well, okay, technically he said "It's Morphin Time." but it might as well have been "whatever" for all the feeling he put into it.
They go after the Samurai Fan Man at the Putty Patrol Restaurant which we have never heard of and will never hear of again. Alas, too bad, it looked like a fun place to hang out. They get blown away by the Fan Man, however, and Alpha reverses their teleportation direction. Wha??? I'm lost.
The only cool thing about this fight is we get to see Giant Goldar take on all the Zords individually. That was awesome. But it fails because the Fan Man is there and somehow beats the crap out of them. With his fan. Tommy is somehow roused from his groaning, concussed state and insists on morphing to help, but DragonZord gets blown away too. They call on Titanus, manage to break open the unbreakable jar, set Kimberly free, form the UltraZord, and then... win the fight pretty much instantly.
Back at Billy's garage, which is apparently the happening place to be since they all spend so much time there, Billy is covered in grease and working on the RadBug. The others are hanging out inside his garage and watching an old television. Mr. Reporter Guy starts a story on Who Are the Power Rangers and Kim reveals she is secretly Jubilee by blowing up the television. Everybody laughs. The end.
List time:
Covered in food? Nobody
Billy Speak? None
Fish? 3.5 for being more boring than anything else
Beers consumed to get me through it? 2.5
Saturday, August 22, 2009
Episode 30 - The Rockstar
Hey, there's no Tommy in this episode! Of course, there's also no Tommy in this episode with no explanation at all! They don't even bother to say Tommy is at a tournament" or "Tommy is visiting family" or "Tommy is at the salon getting his hair done." He just... doesn't exist for the purposes of this episode.
We open with a shot of the Radbug, which is always awesome. Apparently Zack, Kimberly, Billy and Trini are all going on some weekend getaway, and seriously, how OLD are they? I know conventional wisdom has them being 15 in this season since they don't graduate until after Zeo, but they're going away for the weekend and they can drive. Jason is apparently not going with them because his cousin Jeremy, who is not quite as dumb as Cousin Sylvia, but is still pretty ridiculous, is coming to visit.
Somehow the four Rangers manage to pack all of their luggage (Kimberly, I am impressed by how well you pack) and themselves into the Radbug, and Billy tells Jason there would still be room in the backseat, and QueenRiley and I both start giggling. We're both big fans of Mallrats, okay?
Trini is apparently taking a gourmet cooking class, and she brought them brownies for the trip. Since it's a French cooking class, you know exactly where this joke is leading up to. Yes, those are snail brownies. Eww.
Rita is very excited because the Rangers are all going out of town, so she can go look for the Mirror of Destruction, which can blow things up with the light reflected off of it! It can even destroy super putties.
Meanwhile, at the Park, Bulk is eating a sloppy joe pizza, and watching him eat it is gross. Show, please stop with the fatphobia. For real. At least we're halfway through the Bulk and Skull as crazy bullies season (and we are halfway through the first season as of this recap! It only took us nearly six months!) and then Bulk and Skull can start having character development. *sigh*
Jason and his annoying cousin show up, and words are exchanged, and Jeremy asks if these are the famous bullies that Jason told him about. The way it is said makes me believe that Jason was making fun of them to his younger cousin, so this episode totally gets a The Rangers Are Bullies tag. Bulk tries to provoke a physical fight (he's getting better, but he should really know better, since you know Jason is the winner of every tournament in Angel Grove before Tommy showed up) and Jason tricks him into falling on his face.
Leaving Bulk and Skull (also covered in pizza) to themselves, Jason goes to teach cousin Jeremy martial arts on the beach. Cousin Jeremy unfortunately has Jason's fashion sense. Jason tries to teach some more advanced moves to the cousin, and the cousin fails, and Jason tells him he was once insecure, but martial arts helped him get better. Aww, Jason and Adam have so much in common! Jason repeats the "brains over brawn" motto that is the theme of this episode.
Jason and Jeremy get attacked by Super Putties, and the two of them hold their own. Let me repeat that. The things that beat up Four morphed Rangers are now defeated by a twelve-year-old. Talk about Badass Decay.
Jeremy tells Jason he's so excited that this is happening, and both of us start rolling our eyes. Jeremy is all excited about things related to Power Rangers, but he doesn't even question being attacked by putties. I guess that is just the reputation Angel Grove has, although have we ever seen Putties attack Non Rangers at this point? I can't think of anyone.
Miraculously, cousin Jeremy finds a message in a bottle, and they open it. Crazy yellow sparks start shooting out of the bottle, and an Earthquake begins. Jason tells Jeremy to stay there (on top of a cliff, WTF) and jumps down to call Zordon. He gets points for calling Zordon, at least. He knows what his communicator is there for. We get a glimpse of the Radbug driving and hear them go "Earthquake!" and they keep going. I guess someone must have reminded Kimberly that Not All Earthquakes are Rita Related. Although in this case, that isn't true.
Jason and Jeremy look at what was in the bottle, and it's a map that is clearly no place in California. I am telling you, Angel Grove is it's own country, that is the only thing that makes sense. A monster shows up, and Jason tells the kid to run. Instead of morphing, Jason just gets hit by some rocks and is knocked over so he can't move, and Zordon miraculously was paying attention and calls the other Rangers over to help, by telling them to teleport to the beach. I guess the Country of Angel Grove only has one of those.
The Rangers all go off to look for Jeremy in the woods next to the beach, and they are the worst searches ever. Before they get very far, Zordon lets them know that Scorpina and the Rockstar (the monster that shoots rocks at people) are attacking. Billy volunteers to keep looking for Jeremy, and we have some questions. Does Jeremy know Billy? Why isn't Jason doing this, when his cousin is his responsibility? And doesn't Zordon's viewing globe locate people?
All five of them morph (and why Billy morphs we have no idea) and they find Scorpina next to a swimming pool/stadium thing by the beach. Trini and Zack get hit with giant rocks and knocked into the pool, and how they still manage to float considering they have giant rocks attached to them is beyond me.
Jeremy uses the map and finds a rock. He picks up the rock, and under it is a mirror. Worst buried treasure ever. A solitary putty is stalking him, and he opens the mirror and then the putty explodes. Not only does the putty explode, but part of a cliff explodes. Unless that cliff has eyes, the Mirror does not require eyes to blow things up. That is important for later. Anyway, Jeremy is weirded out by the exploding mirror, so he throws it away.
Somehow, Billy has joined in the battle. I guess he wasn't really looking for Jeremy after all. Scorpina now has the mirror since Jeremy threw it away, and Rita makes her grow. Somehow the Rangers manage to summon the zords and bring them together before anything else happens. I guess transformation really is a free action.
Once the Megazord is assembled, Scorpina opens the mirror, and the Rangers all sheild their eyes, so nothing happens. Except that isn't how the mirror works, as it was established three minutes earlier. Whatever. Goldar shows up, and the Rangers manage to get him inbetween them and Scorpina, so Scorpina throws the mirror away so that it won't hurt Goldar. We are really sad that we don't get more of them together in this show. Apparently they even had a cute baby in Zyuranger!
Anyway, the Rangers blow up the mirror, and then (still morphed) they talk to Jeremy. They are seriously bad at this secret identity stuff, because Trini totally pats Jason on the shoulder when Jeremy says he wonders where his cousin is.
We go back to the Youth Center. I guess the others never get their vacation. Jeremy is telling Jason all about his adventures, including parts that there was no way he had seen, because he was busy looking for the mirror while Trini and Zack got thrown into the pool. The Rangers are all excited to hear this kid talk about how awesome they are. I guess the novelty hasn't worn off yet. Jeremy asks Jason where he was, and instead of saying the smart thing or telling Jeremy that he was looking for him Jason just totally blows off the question and says he has to teach a class. The lack of quality education in Angel Grove rears its angry head again.
Lists!
Five fish. If the episode had given us an explanation for where Tommy was, we'd totally have knocked off half a fish for the lack of Tommy, but since it made us wonder where he is, five fish. Also, this episode was totally ridiculous.
Covered in food: Bulk and Skull get covered in sloppy joe pizza.
Billy speak: "An exemplary motto."
"How idiosyncratic."
We open with a shot of the Radbug, which is always awesome. Apparently Zack, Kimberly, Billy and Trini are all going on some weekend getaway, and seriously, how OLD are they? I know conventional wisdom has them being 15 in this season since they don't graduate until after Zeo, but they're going away for the weekend and they can drive. Jason is apparently not going with them because his cousin Jeremy, who is not quite as dumb as Cousin Sylvia, but is still pretty ridiculous, is coming to visit.
Somehow the four Rangers manage to pack all of their luggage (Kimberly, I am impressed by how well you pack) and themselves into the Radbug, and Billy tells Jason there would still be room in the backseat, and QueenRiley and I both start giggling. We're both big fans of Mallrats, okay?
Trini is apparently taking a gourmet cooking class, and she brought them brownies for the trip. Since it's a French cooking class, you know exactly where this joke is leading up to. Yes, those are snail brownies. Eww.
Rita is very excited because the Rangers are all going out of town, so she can go look for the Mirror of Destruction, which can blow things up with the light reflected off of it! It can even destroy super putties.
Meanwhile, at the Park, Bulk is eating a sloppy joe pizza, and watching him eat it is gross. Show, please stop with the fatphobia. For real. At least we're halfway through the Bulk and Skull as crazy bullies season (and we are halfway through the first season as of this recap! It only took us nearly six months!) and then Bulk and Skull can start having character development. *sigh*
Jason and his annoying cousin show up, and words are exchanged, and Jeremy asks if these are the famous bullies that Jason told him about. The way it is said makes me believe that Jason was making fun of them to his younger cousin, so this episode totally gets a The Rangers Are Bullies tag. Bulk tries to provoke a physical fight (he's getting better, but he should really know better, since you know Jason is the winner of every tournament in Angel Grove before Tommy showed up) and Jason tricks him into falling on his face.
Leaving Bulk and Skull (also covered in pizza) to themselves, Jason goes to teach cousin Jeremy martial arts on the beach. Cousin Jeremy unfortunately has Jason's fashion sense. Jason tries to teach some more advanced moves to the cousin, and the cousin fails, and Jason tells him he was once insecure, but martial arts helped him get better. Aww, Jason and Adam have so much in common! Jason repeats the "brains over brawn" motto that is the theme of this episode.
Jason and Jeremy get attacked by Super Putties, and the two of them hold their own. Let me repeat that. The things that beat up Four morphed Rangers are now defeated by a twelve-year-old. Talk about Badass Decay.
Jeremy tells Jason he's so excited that this is happening, and both of us start rolling our eyes. Jeremy is all excited about things related to Power Rangers, but he doesn't even question being attacked by putties. I guess that is just the reputation Angel Grove has, although have we ever seen Putties attack Non Rangers at this point? I can't think of anyone.
Miraculously, cousin Jeremy finds a message in a bottle, and they open it. Crazy yellow sparks start shooting out of the bottle, and an Earthquake begins. Jason tells Jeremy to stay there (on top of a cliff, WTF) and jumps down to call Zordon. He gets points for calling Zordon, at least. He knows what his communicator is there for. We get a glimpse of the Radbug driving and hear them go "Earthquake!" and they keep going. I guess someone must have reminded Kimberly that Not All Earthquakes are Rita Related. Although in this case, that isn't true.
Jason and Jeremy look at what was in the bottle, and it's a map that is clearly no place in California. I am telling you, Angel Grove is it's own country, that is the only thing that makes sense. A monster shows up, and Jason tells the kid to run. Instead of morphing, Jason just gets hit by some rocks and is knocked over so he can't move, and Zordon miraculously was paying attention and calls the other Rangers over to help, by telling them to teleport to the beach. I guess the Country of Angel Grove only has one of those.
The Rangers all go off to look for Jeremy in the woods next to the beach, and they are the worst searches ever. Before they get very far, Zordon lets them know that Scorpina and the Rockstar (the monster that shoots rocks at people) are attacking. Billy volunteers to keep looking for Jeremy, and we have some questions. Does Jeremy know Billy? Why isn't Jason doing this, when his cousin is his responsibility? And doesn't Zordon's viewing globe locate people?
All five of them morph (and why Billy morphs we have no idea) and they find Scorpina next to a swimming pool/stadium thing by the beach. Trini and Zack get hit with giant rocks and knocked into the pool, and how they still manage to float considering they have giant rocks attached to them is beyond me.
Jeremy uses the map and finds a rock. He picks up the rock, and under it is a mirror. Worst buried treasure ever. A solitary putty is stalking him, and he opens the mirror and then the putty explodes. Not only does the putty explode, but part of a cliff explodes. Unless that cliff has eyes, the Mirror does not require eyes to blow things up. That is important for later. Anyway, Jeremy is weirded out by the exploding mirror, so he throws it away.
Somehow, Billy has joined in the battle. I guess he wasn't really looking for Jeremy after all. Scorpina now has the mirror since Jeremy threw it away, and Rita makes her grow. Somehow the Rangers manage to summon the zords and bring them together before anything else happens. I guess transformation really is a free action.
Once the Megazord is assembled, Scorpina opens the mirror, and the Rangers all sheild their eyes, so nothing happens. Except that isn't how the mirror works, as it was established three minutes earlier. Whatever. Goldar shows up, and the Rangers manage to get him inbetween them and Scorpina, so Scorpina throws the mirror away so that it won't hurt Goldar. We are really sad that we don't get more of them together in this show. Apparently they even had a cute baby in Zyuranger!
Anyway, the Rangers blow up the mirror, and then (still morphed) they talk to Jeremy. They are seriously bad at this secret identity stuff, because Trini totally pats Jason on the shoulder when Jeremy says he wonders where his cousin is.
We go back to the Youth Center. I guess the others never get their vacation. Jeremy is telling Jason all about his adventures, including parts that there was no way he had seen, because he was busy looking for the mirror while Trini and Zack got thrown into the pool. The Rangers are all excited to hear this kid talk about how awesome they are. I guess the novelty hasn't worn off yet. Jeremy asks Jason where he was, and instead of saying the smart thing or telling Jeremy that he was looking for him Jason just totally blows off the question and says he has to teach a class. The lack of quality education in Angel Grove rears its angry head again.
Lists!
Five fish. If the episode had given us an explanation for where Tommy was, we'd totally have knocked off half a fish for the lack of Tommy, but since it made us wonder where he is, five fish. Also, this episode was totally ridiculous.
Covered in food: Bulk and Skull get covered in sloppy joe pizza.
Billy speak: "An exemplary motto."
"How idiosyncratic."
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