Episode 20- Green With Evil Part 4- Eclipsing Megazord

I'm still not entirely sure what was going on in this episode. I'll do my best for you loyal readers but if it doesn't make much sense, don't blame me. Blame the writers of the episode. I... don't even know.

Okay, so the Rangers are wondering if Goldar attacking is a trap. Well duh. They try to morph but can't. Lots of sparks and small explosions and the Command Center powers down. Apparently they overloaded the system and broke the Morphin Grid. Yeah...

But no worries! Billy can fix it. Somehow. Something about connecting two positive electrodes and we're rather forcibly reminding of the whole "negative proton molecules" reason for Billy not taking the Gold Ranger powers in Zeo (which I know is in the future, but it all kind of molds together in my head in some sort of wibbly-wobbly-timey-wimey thing). So Billy fixes the morphin grid. It makes no sense whatsoever but I'm totally stoked that BILLY fixed the fracking MORPHIN GRID. He's awesome.

Scorpina then kicks major tail in an awesome battle where she just rules. She is seriously powerful. The Rangers, now morphed thanks to the awesomeness of Billy fixing the Morphin Grid, are scattered like little flies at Scorpina's force. Goldar, giant sized, tries to step on them, but fails. For some reason, with all the ground shaking and monster fighting going on, Bulk and Skull steal a bus from the Youth Center parking lot and drive straight towards the battle. Apparently they were trying to get away but, um, yeah.

Tommy ends up in the Command Center again while Alpha is distracted trying to get Zordon back. Tommy breaks him again by... pulling a tab on his back? Really? Okay.

Rita joins the fight with the Rangers by taunting them while flying on her awesome bicycle. Even better, she calls Jason by name. Aw. Meanwhile, Goldar picks up the bus and tells the Rangers their little friends Bulk and Skull are in there. He's having fun with them. Bulk and Skull, not so much. Goldar puts them down on the edge of a cliff and, though the wheels aren't even over, Kim becomes frightened and worried they'll "go over any second".

Back at the Command Center, Alpha recovers with the aide of his backup system and encases the Green Ranger in a force field. He gets Zordon back and I'm still scratching my head. Backup system? What happened to it last time? Deus ex machina shows up in this episode as if it multiplies like bunnies.

Back at the fight, the Rangers get in the MegaZord and manage to catch the bus before it falls off the cliff. Y'know, the cliff it wasn't even really hanging over in the first place. Instead of placing it safely on the ground or on the road home, they put it back on the cliff. Good thinking there, guys.

Rita sets her plan in motion and a solar eclipse starts. The MegaZord quickly loses power. Because it's powered by the sun apparently. Or so this episode says. The MegaZord is then attacked by both Giant Goldar and Giant Scorpina and continues to lose power as the moon continues to eclipse the sun. But wait! There is hope! The Deus Ex Machina offspring, I mean, The Power Sword can restore power to the power cells! Okay then.

Back at the Command Center, Tommy is snarking hard core at Zordon and Alpha. I mean, seriously, wow is he ever snarky and sarcastic and just an all around pain in the rear. He's awesome when he's evil though. Zordon tells Alpha to demorph him so they can find out who is behind the Green Ranger but he magically teleports himself out of the force field and away from the Command Center. I have no idea how. It is not explained, it just happens.

He grows super big and attacks the Rangers too! So now they are being electrocuted by Giant Scorpina's tail, beaten up by Giant Goldar, and battered around by Giant Green Ranger. All while losing power. And trying to fight back with the Power Sword. And restore their own power with the Power Sword. It's not working, though, and they use the last of the juice only to be smacked down, force demorphed, and watch their Zords get eaten by a volcano. Shouldn't Kim's pteradactyl be immune to that though? I mean, when she summons it, the darn thing flies right out of an erupting volcano. You'd think it would handle the lava just fine.

They make it back to the Command Center and talk about giving up. Jason gives a pretty good motivational speech for a leader of few words and Zack tells him to give it up anyway. Then Zordon reveals they have the identity of the Green Ranger. Apparently Alpha scanned his interspacial bio vibrations while he was in the force field. I... I don't even know. I have no explanation for that. I had to move on before I injured my brain trying to puzzle it out.

Everyone is shocked to learn that Tommy is the Green Ranger and then we get the dreaded To Be Continued screen of blackness.

And I still don't know what happened in that episode.

List? Yes, let's, shall we?

5 fish. I just... there is no way it's any less. Billy fixes the morphin grid (which is awesome, but really?). Teleporting out of force fields? Interspacial bio vibrations? Zords being eaten by a volcano? I just... no. There is no way this is anything but 5 fish.

Nobody is covered in food and there is no Billy speak to mention.

Episode 14 - Power Rangers Punks

First, a note of clarification on fish - We try not to add fish based on the inherent ridiculousness of the types of monsters or spells themselves. I mean, Power Rangers is totally ridiculous, and if we were judging it based on just that we'd have to give Pudgy Pig 5 fish just because a Pudgy Pig was trying to eat all the food in the world. We (mostly) try to judge the Fish based on how unclear the episode is, or how much the show contradicts its own continuity, which is... why we call it the fish scale in the first place. There will be capslock rage when Billy moves to the fish planet, we're just saying. Basically, it gets fish if we get thrown out of the episode, which is why some of the more ridiculous Tommy centric episodes will get high fish, or if the Rangers behavior makes us start yelling about their failure as role models.

Anyway. Power Punks is one of my favorite episodes of Power Rangers, and the Terror Toad is my favorite Monster of the week, even beating out Pudgy Pig which is QueenRiley's favorite. And considering the week I've had, I was really glad that we were watching this episode. There was actually momentary confusion, because for some reason some of the youtube videos insisted that this was actually episode 21. But we're going with it is episode 14, because that is what Rangers Central tells us, and also we like this episode.

The episode opens with a fabulous game of volleyball, and the best music we've heard on the show yet. Trini and Jason are playing against Zack and Billy, and Billy is doing really well. He falls over while trying to hit the ball, and the Rangers give him an honest compliment! (We've determined it is an honest compliment because they usually overact way more when they're being purposefully mean.) Billy and Kimberly switch places, and we discover that Baboo has created a "Punk Potion" that he will use on the Rangers. Jason and Trini win the game, and then Jason tempts fate by saying "So who do we take on next?"

The answer to that question is a squad of Putties! While the Rangers are fighting them, Baboo peddles over on Rita's amazing bicycle and spikes all the drinks with the Punk Potion. Kimberly and Billy (who, incidentally are the best dressed Rangers this episode. Trini needs to stop wearing sweaters with shorts, and we don't even know what is up with Jason's tank top) drink the water, and are immediately turned into punks, causing us to speculate that the "Punk Potion" was actually just imprints of Bulk and Skull's personality, like in Dollhouse.

The spell instantly affects Kimberly and Billy (for some reason all of the more ridiculous things seem to happen to these two - first body switching and now this) and they instantly become Power Rangers Universe versions of Punks. That... mostly means that they overact in an amazingly over the top manner and yell "YEAH" a lot and call people geeks and dorks. Which is at least consistent with Bulk and Skull. Billy calls them all dorks, and Kimberly and Billy leave, while the others just stand there. Trini suggests that maybe they just got too much sun. Look, we know that it's early in the series, but when Billy starts calling people dorks, it means he's under a spell.

The next day at school, we find out that apparently Bulk's locker is filled with garbage (seriously, show? Stop with the fatphobia. It is beginning to drive us nuts) and that the Rangers are vaguely worried about Billy and Kimberly, but they don't appear to have checked on them at all. That at least is totally consistent with everything else about their friendship. They really are the worst friends ever. And then we get the grand entrance of Billy and Kimberly, in their punk gear. We... well, we will let the fandom secret speak for itself. (And if you're the person who made this secret, hi, please come be our new BFF?) Seriously, punk!Billy is WICKED HOT. Punk!Kimberly has an awesome jacket, but her hair is insane and everything about her outfit is crazy. But OMG, Punk!Billy. Everything about him is wonderful.

The other Rangers just stand there and watch as Billy and Kimberly harass some poor guy in the hallway, and then Kimberly hits on Skull. I'm personally convinced that she and Billy have already hooked up as Punks (and possibly while they were body-switched) but Skull is nearly dead of joy as Kimberly asks him out. Then Billy threatens Bulk, in karmic retribution for Bulk being mean to him. Even after all of that, the three non-affected Rangers can only say "What's with them?" Of course, at this point Zordon suddenly remembers that he has the ability to observe what's going on, so he teleports all of the Rangers to the Command Center, and imprisons Kimberly and Billy behind a force field. Good thing nobody else was in that hallway!

While the Rangers are at the Command Center, Zordon tells them that they have two problems. First, the Power Punk Spell can only be removed with juice from a Singing Squash, which is only found in other dimensions. (At this point we get a brief glimpse of Zordon in his non-warp bubble form. Exciting!) Also, Rita has unleashed the Terror Toad, which a) eats people and b) has a listing under Fetish Fuel on tvtropes. Oh, fandom. (Okay, to be fair, it is also listed under Nightmare Fuel. Anyway. The Terror Toad is still awesome because it is an amazingly creepy villain. Kimberly, in her Punk state refers to it as "Wartsville" which should be the name of a band or a song or something.

Zack, Trini and Jason go off to fight the Terror Toad, and Zack and Trini almost immediately get eaten by the Toad. Alpha goes off to find the Singing Squash, and he makes the mistake of commenting that it appears to be too easy. Of course, this means he immediately gets set upon by Putties. But wait! Apparently Alpha has internal defenses, so he takes them all down easily. Man, if Alpha was leading the Rangers, they'd have totally won by now! He pulls the Singing Squash, which turns out to basically be a mandrake and returns to the Power Chamber, where Billy and Kimberly are making fun of Zordon. They call him a "Big Green Geekoid." Seriously, if there is an award for best overacting, it totally goes to Amy Jo Johnson and David Yost for this episode.

They drink the potion that Alpha makes for them, and Kimberly is horrified by her nails (I'm personally scared for anyone who happens to be around her when she sees her hair) and Billy says "Alpha?" in this terrified voice. They morph (calling out in unison, which is adorable) and arrive to battle the Terror Toad just in time for Jason to be eaten. Billy comes up with a plan to beat the Toad, but then gets eaten as well. And unlike the other Rangers, he actually gets swallowed Terrifying! Kimberly then shoots the Terror Toad in its weak spot, right below its neck, freeing the other Rangers. She then shoots the Toad again, and I'm pretty sure she must get her arrows from the same place that Robin Hood does, because the arrow swerves around trees. The Terror Toad explodes, making this the second time that Kimberly defeats a monster on her own. She is clearly the most powerful of all the Rangers. (It's worth pointing out that Baboo showed up to join the battle briefly. He is adorable.)

Afterward, back at the Youth Center, Kimberly is helping Trini with some neat gymnastics moves, while Skull shows up for his date. At this point we both start wincing because we feel so bad for him. He dressed up! He did his hair! And she did say she'd go out with him. Kimberly is horrified by this, and Billy tells Bulk and Skull that Kimberly and Trini don't date neanderthals. This isn't true at all! Kimberly dates Tommy for a really long time. And then something happens where Billy and Zack try to defend the girls honor or something by playing volleyball. I really don't know, but we got about 19 minutes into the episode before we yelled fish!

Lists!
Fish scale: 1.5 fish. The lowest rated episode yet. Seriously, this episode is amazing, and all fandoms should have a gone punk episode.

Billy Speak: If we just transpose ourselves
Kimberly translation: You mean switch positions?

(For the record, we can totally imaging them having that conversation in bed. Possibly I've developed a Kimberly/Billy thing.)

Covered in food: Bulk and Skull get covered in... the disgusting garbage that was in Bulk's locker.

Fanfic that people should really write: Kimberly goes out with Skull. Look, don't judge me, okay?

Episode 7- Big Sister

I strongly dislike this episode. It's horrible. It's a struggle to get through it. This episode contains some of the worst dubbing EVER. The plot is... um... well I'm sure it's there somewhere and I might be able to find it if only I could dig deep enough. Alas, I haven't the fortitude. As it is, TSB required a glass of wine and I downed an entire beer before we could watch this episode in it's entirety. We needed the alcohol to numb us.

We start the episode with Kim and Trini, atrociously dressed, looking frantically around the Youth Center for a little girl in pigtails. We learn she's twelve, named Maria, and part of a Big Sisters program for which Kim and Trini volunteered their time. Thankfully we get to be distracted from the blindingly bad clothing by Jason and Zack sparring. Jason's arms are dazzling and Zack is shirtless. It's so pretty we've decided Zack should have spent the rest of the series shirtless. That is one good looking young man.

We're then treated to the apparently hilarious sight of a group of teenage boys running out of the shower, soap in their hair and towels around their waists. Maria is laughing by the valve for the hot water, having shut it off to get Kim and Trini's attention. Why she needed to pull a prank (and way to be supportive and understanding, Rangers, laughing at the poor mostly naked boys) to get the attention of two teenagers who spent the past half hour looking for her, I'm not sure.

Rita has found the Power Eggs, some sort of weapon she's been looking for for all of ten seconds. She can't open the box, however, and needs a child. She commands Finster to make her a monster to kidnap a diabolic and mean child, and requests the Chunky Chicken. He does not even remotely resemble a tin of questionable meat, though that's all I can think of when he's on screen. Chunky Chicken. Bad name for a monster. Bad name for a food product at that.

Kim and Trini have taken the Not-A-Twelve-Year-Old to the park for a picnic. Kim has asked her about boys, apparently assuming all twelve year olds are interested in them (surprise surprise, they're not), when, oh no, they're attacked by putties! The Not-A-Twelve-Year-Old is not even the slightest bit scared and instead manages to get herself kidnapped. The girls race back to the Youth Center (why didn't they just use their communicators?) only to find Jason daring Zack to eat an enormous ice cream sundae. It was surprisingly typical behaviour for teenage boys and I'm amazed it made it into the episode. They hardly get a word in before the communicators start making an odd sound and we find out they're not working! We don't know why they're not working, and we never find out, but how very convenient for the plot.

I can forgive that, however, as we're introduced to the most awesome vehicle ever, the Radbug! Billy has been working on it in his garage for awhile as a surprise. We can only assume Trini, despite all the time spent at Billy's, did not know about it because Billy wanted to surprise her... in a very uncomfortable place. I also must mention that Trini, Jason, and Kim all fit in the back. Of a Volkswagon. In a very uncomfortable place, if you know what I mean. The Radbug gets our heroes to the Command Center in record time where we discover Zordon knows absolutely nothing about what's been going on. Zordon's observing skills really need some work. Zordon has been fearing Rita would find the Power Eggs for ten millennium, yet he didn't set up some kind of watch to see if she'd go after them? It took her all of ten seconds to find them... Zordon!fail.

The Rangers take the Radbug to the location of the Power Eggs and meet up with Goldar, Squat, Baboo, and the Tinned Meat Product. They morph, they fight, and then we see Rita flying on her bicycle! This whole episode could be worth it just because we get to see Rita on her bicycle. That's one classy villain. The Rangers call the Zords in the Longest. Summoning. Sequence. EVER. I think it took a quarter of the episode just to summon the Zords. The MegaZord catches Maria just as the Tinned Meat Product cuts the ropes that are dangling her over... somewhere. We can't help but cheer on the Tinned Meat Product. We don't particularly care what happens to Maria and the Bad Dubbing of Doom, despite Jason's creepy obsession with saving "the little girl". Billy summons the Radbug and it, like the true hero it is, saves the day by getting Bad-Dubbing-of-Doom Maria off our screen.

I must note that the Rangers talk to Maria while they are holding her in the MegaZords hands and she can clearly hear them. While doing so, they call each other BY NAME. Way to be discreet and protect your secret identities there, guys.

We are treated to the shortest fight scene ever and then back to the Youth Center. Mr. Reporter Guy is reporting on some environmentally conscious youths in the area when he interrupts the story to tell us the Power Rangers saved the day and rescued a little girl. Good job, Mr. Reporter Guy! Ernie then asks Kim to get his bowl of freshly made vegetarian chili, declares it on the house, and then a crowd convenes around Kim causing her to throw the chili. It lands, rather predictably, on Bulk in his only appearance in this episode.

And that's the end of that one, thank goodness. List time!

Billy speak: None really.
Covered with food: Bulk gets covered in vegetarian chili and the poor guy doesn't even get a line.

Rating: 4 fish. Were it not for the Radbug and Rita's bicycle, this would have been a 4.5 at the very least.