Episode 280 - Dark Specter's Revenge - Part 2

WE LIVE. I handed in my thesis, so now we will have the time of GREAT PANIC while I wait on results.

So we continue with the Megazords trying to push an asteroid out of the way while people on Earth panic. Just as it's entering Earth's atmosphere Zhane shows up with another Zord and somehow that is enough to get it out of the atmosphere without the asteroid breaking up at all (wtf is this thing made of, anyway?) and they push it back into space and whatever, I am not going to argue with the science, but I wonder what the Bad Astronomer would have to say about that.

Zhane gets all the hugs, and he tells them that the rebels built the ship. The Rangers fill Zhane in on the whole Astronema = Karone thing, and Zhane is all "I knew there was something good about her!" and offers to go with Andros to find her, saying he has an interest in Karone as well. You can clearly see the "oh shit, I've got a thing for my boyfriend's sister" on Zhane's face, and also Andros is concerned when Zhane says he has an interest.

Zhane and Andros follow a solitary tie fighter to a space station, and Andros and Zhane continue the "you went on a date with my sister!" "JUST ONE DATE?" thing and AHAHAH awesome, but boys, this is SO NOT THE TIME to figure out your poly relationships.

So the boys steal some Quantrons uniforms, and they're a little short to be storm troopers, and really, show, you're making this too easy.

They find Astronema and take off the helmet, only to find that she's been all Borgified, and she calls Ecliptor to attack them. There's a pretty great fight, and there's no way they're going to win and escape with Astronema, so they end up retreating, leaving her in her brainwashed and Borgified state.

This is pretty epic, seriously.

They end up stealing some velocifighters to escape, and they make it back to the Megaship, and Andros has the biggest sad.

Meanwhile, Bulk, Skull and the Professor had some hijinks where they thought they made it to another planet, but nope, still on Earth. Oh, and then they get attacked by a monster. Luckily, there are Power Rangers to the rescue. Including Zhane in his new toy.

Hey, points for a very bondagey fight.

And then the Rangers give Bulk, Skull, and the Professor a ride on their galaxy gliders. ADORABLE.

Meanwhile, the Borg Princess kicks Darkonda out. And Andros, and Zhane are trying to figure out how to fix Astronema. DUN DUN DUN.

Fish: 2! The science is a little screwy, but EPIC IS EPIC.

Episode 278 - The Rangers' Leap of Faith

So we start off with the ending of the last episode again. We already saw this! Both sides have valid points, and they need to learn the value of compromise.

Seriously, they're replaying the ENTIRE LAST SCENE. I mean, it's a great scene, but when you only have so long in an episode, do you really want to waste it?

So we finally get to a new scene after the credits, and Karone is tied to a poll in the maintenance bay. Andros shows up to give her some food and I'm just picturing Tommy screaming at the others after this, because... yeah. Andros brings Karone some food, and they have a discussion about trust. Then Karone asks about their parents, and it is very sad, and they start bonding over that. Apparently they stayed up talking and slept in there.

When they approach the planet, Andros springs the news on the others that it has to look like Astronema captured them. Maybe you should have mentioned that in advance, Andros.

Astronema contacts Dark Spectre and he's all "I'm so proud of you" and then lowers the force field. Rangers in chains, you guys. :D

As soon as possible, the Rangers remove their chains, and TJ starts issuing orders. Once a red...

Fighters stop by, and Astronema is all "What, they're escorts" and the Rangers do not look happy. Andros escorts Astronema off the bridge while TJ pilots and looks all badass.

TJ doesn't like it and decides to ditch the escorts, which um, is BEYOND STUPID. Because now you have advertised that Astronema isn't there, and also for all you know, they WERE leading you there.

The ship gets hit by lightning and there's smoke and darkness and all super dramatic, and then they crash. TJ, I adore you, but that was STUPID.

For a planet with such an unstable atmosphere, the planet looks very nice.

Andros runs back to check on Karone, and she has apparently ditched her chains and left the ship. TJ takes this as confirmation that she was leading them into a trap, and Andros refuses to believe it. They go exploring and run into Darkonda and the Pirahnatrons. Time to morph!

The other Rangers distract things while they yell for Andros to go find Zordon, and Karone grabs Andros while the others are all getting captured. Ecliptor shows up but he can't hurt Astronema, so he tells them to just go on. Darkonda then attacks Ecliptor and calls him a traitor, and he manages to capture him.

Andros and Karone comes upon Zordon's warp tube, and DUN DUN DUN, it turned out to actually be a trap. That was actually Dark Spectre in there, and the rangers are all captured. Astronema tells Dark Spectre that her trap worked perfectly, and he tells her to destroy them, and then teleports out. She tells Darkonda to destroy them, and then right before he's about to, she blasts him in the back and lets the other Rangers escape.

There's a fight scene, and it looks like the Rangers will get caught again, but Ecliptor comes to the rescue, and he tells Karone and the others to go, even though she yells that she can't leave him. She loves her surrogate daddy! The Rangers escape.

Dark Spectre gives Darkonda control of the dark fortress, but only until Astronema returns. Dark Spectre says he has plans for Astronema and Ecliptor, that will ensure they never stray again.

Back on the bridge of the Megaship, TJ leads the others in apologizing to Karone. She tells them that she's never had friends, and that she hopes that one day they'll believe that she doesn't want to hurt them. They tell her that they believe her right now, and also, now she has five friends. Ashley grabs her hand and seriously looks like she's about to kiss it. I feel this is relevant to people's interests.

End episode with Alpha saying the gesture of friendship is so beautiful.

Fish: 2! The plans and crosses and betrayals all worked out pretty nicely.

Episode 277- Astronema Thinks Twice

Today on Power Rangers, it's Astronema's turn to have a sad.

She's wandering around Earth as the memories start to come back to her. She won't let go of the locket and part of her remembers being snatched as a child, a little boy chasing after her, but she doesn't want to. She's so conflicted! And she plays it SO WELL.

Andros finds her and confronts her, because he knows she remembers. He thinks if he can just get her to see, she'll accept him and the goodness still inside her. She attacks instead and runs away, but I can't really blame her. She's confronting the fact that her whole life up to that point has been a lie. That's a big deal.

Darkonda delights in the conflict. Ecliptor is not so happy that Darkonda is having fun tearing apart his Adopted Daughter. He's going to take care of that for her, and get rid of Darkonda once and for all. Or, well, that's the plan anyway. The battle is amazing and Darkonda actually tries to run away, but Ecliptor will have none of it. He is determined to take care of this problem for Karone. Unfortunately, Darkonda cheats and forces Ecliptor to join with him again. Ecliptor escapes, barely, and Darkonda gets away again. Ecliptor screams out Darkonda.

Darkonda is counting down his lives and requests Dark Spectre destroy Ecliptor for him. Yeah, that's soooo not happening.

Astronema confronts Ecliptor about her brother, and Ecliptor explains that he was made to be evil, but she was born to be good. It's only because of him that she is who she has become. Except that Ecliptor isn't really evil! He loves! He has a heart! He cares deeply! He will do whatever it takes to save those who matter to him! He's only evil because he thinks that's what he has to be! Oh Ecliptor, I adore you and your poor tortured story. Astronema loves him and is determined to remain evil for him, so she sends a monster after Andros.

This show could benefit from an Adopted Dad Logan tumblr. Just saying.

She goes to watch the fight and is once again torn by emotions. Andros is getting the snot beat out of him, and he loses his morpher, which she manages to grab. She could save him, but she's not sure yet if she should and OMG THIS SHOW! ALL MY LOVE FOR THIS SHOW. She throws him his morpher and walks away, while he morphs and saves himself from the monster she sent to him (and then the others show up and there is all the toys and yada yada yada I don't care about this part).

I freaking ADORE these episodes. This is probably the tightest Power Rangers has ever been.

Dark Spectre doubts Astronema. She wants to be evil. He commands her to destroy Andros, knowing who he is. She hesitates, but decides to do it anyway.

Meanwhile, the others are trying to convince Andros that she's still dangerous. He refuses to see it and goes to meet her alone. Astronema tells Andros she'll take him to Zordon. He BELIEVES HER. BECAUSE HE WANTS TO. HE EVEN TAKES HER ON THE SHIP, and the others totally aren't happy with it. And understandably so! She's spent the better part of this season trying to kill them. He defends her, they grudgingly go along with it but only after she gives the coordinates. And now nobody really trusts Andros (and I can't blame them, but I can't blame him either). Oh Andros. Sweetheart. ALL THE CRIES.

Episode 276- The Secret of the Locket

Today on Power Rangers, we get the best plot twist of the late 90's. Remember 1998, guys? I was 17. I did NOT see this episode coming, not at all. It's old hat now, but it seemed so novel at the time.

So we all know Andros has the Biggest Sad to Ever Sad on Power Rangers (thus far), right? He lost his sister at a young age and has never been able to find her. Then his boyfriend best friend takes a hit for him and has to spend two years cryogenically frozen in the hopes of one day being healed enough to emerge. His entire planet is destroyed and the few survivors must scatter to the reaches of the galaxy. So what could possibly make poor Andros have an even bigger Sad? TODAY'S EPISODE, THAT'S WHAT.

So Andros finally gets to confront Darkonda about kidnapping Karone. He's a man possessed with this battle and honestly, as much as I get tired of the fighting, this battle is pretty epic and I could happily watch more of it. It would only be more amazing if he did it unmorphed. Because Andros is just a BAMF like that. He's almost had him destroyed, too, when Ecliptor distracts him long enough for Darkonda to escape. Then there is epic crying. Poor Andros.

Darkonda hangs out in the forest and does some major monologuing while setting up some hidden underground trigger which causes a bunch of lasers to fire. This bad guy seriously never stops talking to himself. Back on the ship, however, Andros lays in his dark bunk and has nightmares. Because that's what you do when your entire life has been one traumatizing event after another.

In what can only be described as beating us about the head with it, the shot of Andros holding the picture of his sister fades into Astronema holding a locket and asking Ecliptor where he found her. He says her parents and brother were killed by the power rangers and she was left on his doorstep, the only survivor. She thinks her brother is alive and he assures her otherwise, so she goes to attack Earth to make herself feel more evil.

It kind of works, until she sees a woman ushering her children away. The little girl falls and the little boy goes back to get her and Andros has to rush to their rescue. He launches on top of them to take the devastating blow coming to them, but Astronema attacks her own Quantrons to stop them from hurting the family. Andros is confused because clearly he has not been watching the same show we have.

Darkonda shows up and tempts Andros away from the battle. Ecliptor follows, because he's curious, as you are. Andros falls right into the trap, but manages to avoid stepping on the land mine altogether. He is unintentionally brilliant like that. There is another epic battle and Darkonda taunts Andros about Karone, saying she doesn't know he exists, etc etc etc. Darkonda then STEPS ON HIS OWN MINE. And blows himself up. Because Ecliptor got in the way and drew him out into the open. He intentionally saved Andros' life, and says it will just be this one time. Andros is thoroughly confused. Again, because he isn't watching the same show we are.

Andros is back in the main fight and ends up fighting Astronema. She's angry and confused and full of emotion, so she takes it out on him. He manages to cut off her locket and she is clearly upset, but has to flee before she can get the locket. Andros starts to look for the locket, but they have a monster to fight first. So some of the toys come out and we all know what happens here.

Let's get back to that locket, shall we? Andros is wandering around the smoldering battlefield when he finds it on some rebar. Astronema is also there trying to find her locket (I assume she still has it mostly because Ecliptor is really not as bad as he seems... he loves her, he's cared for her all those years, so he let her keep it... and mostly because I just really love this plot device). Andros opens it and sees his sister and himself, tiny pictures inside. He is shocked and pulls out his own locket with the same pictures inside. He knows she's Karone now. Astronema does not want to believe this. She knows it's true, you can see it on her face, but she doesn't want to believe it. She fights back and then runs away. Both are clearly overcome with emotion, unsure of what to do next and how to handle things.

So Andros finds his sister and then loses her, because she's the bad guy and he will have to destroy her to save the Earth. Oh Andros. Your Biggest Sad Ever just got bigger, poor boy.

2.5 fish. It actually made a fair amount of sense, for a Power Rangers episode anyway.

Episode 273 - A Date With Danger

So um. I have mentioned I really like the villain/Ranger thing, right? (See Goldar/Jason, Scorpina/Adam, Scorpina/Aisha, eventually Trakeena/Damon and Lucas/Nadira...)

Yeah, so Astronema/Zhane is TOTALLY on that list.

Which is why I'm recapping this and not Queenriley, who just informed me that if she was doing it, the recap would consist of "BUT YOU CAN'T MACK ON YOUR EX-BOYFRIEND'S LITTLE SISTER! IT'S JUST NOT RIGHT!"

Instead I will talk about Astronema/Zhane and how they should have really great sex.

We open up in a fight scene. That's usually not a good sign, but Zhane and Astronema flirting/fighting is great, especially when Zhane tricks Astronema into shooting her own monster. He tries to attack her and Zhane comes to her aid, because... she's hot?

Meanwhile, the other Rangers have destroyed the other monster, and we hit theme song. Such a good theme song.

Zhane has apparently taken Astronema to a secluded spot in the woods. He's ditched the helmet, built a fire, and propped her staff up against the tree. Then she stares at his ass for a minute, and then pretends to sleep again. And then he brings her something to drink, which she promptly insults.

Zhane is sad that she doesn't like his cooking. Meanwhile, Astronema is all "I could destroy you right now" and Zhane is all "here, let me show you how to toast marshmallows with your staff."

Astronema, honey, if you don't take him, QR and I will fight over him.

Astronema tells Zhane that they're still enemies, and then thanks him for saving her. We get some more shots of his ass. SO GREAT.

Back on the megaship, Carlos and TJ are goofing around, and Cassie and Ashley are all excited that star crossed lovers is playing. Carlos has no desire to see it. CARLOS, THIS IS WHY ASHLEY IS IGNORING YOU FOR ANDROS.

Meanwhile, Astronema is daydreaming about Zhane. Because he's dreeeamy. She's too busy fantasizing to be bothered with details about destroying the Rangers.

Back on the Megaship, Zhane is laying in his bunk, with one hand holding up a picture of Astronema, and we see nothing else of him. Gee, I wonder what he's doing?

Then the girls interrupt and drag him off to a movie. Even though he had better things to do. Astronema decides not to send monsters to interrupt their movie and instead goes down herself, ditching the awesome hair. (Note: Carlos thought the movie was romantic. Clearly he was having a lot of fun during the movie.)

Zhane stares at the movie poster and fantasizes about kissing Astronema. Astronema in human!form knocks into him, and causes him to drop his picture. Then she shoots him a LOVE LETTER with his picture of her, telling him to meet her at the campfire at 5.

Elgar and Ecliptor try to figure out where Astronema is, and then they decide to just go ahead with the plan anyway, because they're sure that's what they would have wanted. This interrupts the five main rangers discussion of the movie + food, and this time the monster knows all about their weapons. Because of the first fight.

Back at the picnic spot, Astronema has set up the BEST PICNIC EVER. Zhane has run to the Megaship where he's busy primping for the date. And he's bought flowers for Astronema! But Zhane is interrupted because the monster is attacking and so he has to miss the date. SAD FOR EVERYONE.

Astronema is getting pissed that he's late, and Zhane is clearly trying to get this done as soon as possible. Andros punches Ecliptor and then Zhane knocks off the monster's horns and it grows. Zhane is all "I AM LATE. YOU GO KILL THIS THING." And they do. Which I don't care about, because toys fighting and can we get back to Astronema and Zhane's soap opera, please????

Zhane shows up with flowers, and Astronema blasts him because he's LATE. Now he's all covered in mud. Astronema is mad that he stood her up and he's like "I DIDN'T." Zhane tells her he wouldn't have been late if she hadn't sent down any monsters, and she calls him a liar and says he never wants to see her again. EVERYONE HAS A SAD NOW.

Back on the Megaship, Ashley gets elected to find out what's wrong with Zhane. She fails, so Andros tries. Zhane just makes a sadface at him. When he fails, Cassie tries, but he just walks away. SUCH A SAD, ZHANE.

Back on the satellite, Astronema crumples up her picture of Zhane, but she can't make herself throw it away. BECAUSE OTP YOU GUYS. THIS IS SO GREAT.

Fish: 3 So how did they get the pictures of each other anyway? How did Zhane manage to set up the campfire that quickly? How long did it take for Zhane to fight the mosnter and be late? (I DON'T CARE HOW MANY FISH THIS HAS, IT IS SO GREAT.)

Fic we want: ALL THE ZHANE/ASTRONEMA. SECRET DATING. MY FAVORITE. Also, Astronema being pissed at Ecliptor for screwing up her date.

Episode 269 - Invasion of the Body Switcher

And we're back! Look, real life sucks (see both grad school and computer issues) but it is RECAP TIME. And we have some amazing episodes to recap.

Or at least I remember them being amazing. The last time I watched them. LIVE UP TO MY EXPECTATIONS, SHOW.

We open with Ashley's birthday. TJ tries to steal some of her cake, and Carlos asks her what she wished for, clearly hoping she's wishing for him. Cassie, meanwhile, is assuming Ashley is wishing for Andros. Of course, since Carlos gave her a fire extinguisher.... um. I can think of a few things they could do with that. Yeah.

Andros tells Ashley that they don't celebrate birthdays on KO-35 but he got her a necklace anyway. WAY TO UPSTAGE CARLOS'S POSSIBLY KINKY GIFT, ANDROS. Cassie is clearly jealous that Andros is going overboard with the gift.

Dark Spectre is yelling at Astronema for failing, so she summons a body switcher to make her into a Ranger, and he turns her into Ashley. EVIL ASHLEY IS SO GREAT, YOU GUYS. (Tracy Lynn Cruz said at Morphicon that this is her favorite episode. I am not surprised.)

Ashley and Cassie are debating over whether or not Andros likes her, and Cassie is doing the supportive best friend thing, until she TOTALLY FAILS to notice that Ashley was just kidnapped right there. Ashley tries to escape, but Astronema/Ashley summons some Pirahnatrons to fake!attack her while real!Ashley is dragged off, and wow, we were getting pretty close to some panty shots there.

Astronema!Ashley fake fighting the Pirahnatrons is AMAZING, by the way. She's so annoyed when one of them actually hurts her! Astronema!Ashley then decides they should go back to the Megaship, where DECA helpfully tells her where the engine is, so Astronema!Ashley blows her up.

Cassie asks Astronema!Ashley for some help but Astronema!Ashley is bad at things. She's about to blast Cassie when they cut away.

Astronema!Ashley then has sex with Carlos adds more weight to Carlos's weightlifting and then blasts him, and then they have more sex.

Meanwhile, real!Ashley convinces the monster to turn her into Astronema. Ashley!Astronema convinces Elgar that she's the real Astronema and he lets her go. BECAUSE SHE IS GREAT.

Astronema!Ashley runs into Alpha who is giving her a birthday present, just because they're friends, and she is so confused. It's a tiny little figurine that plays music, and Alpha could clearly turn Astronema good. Astronema!Ashley is so confused and needs SO MANY HUGS. And then she dumps the figure in the trash. :(

TJ and Andros are getting worried about the surveillance issue so TJ goes looking for everyone while Astronema!Ashley is dragging Carlos' unconscious form around the ship. Then she beats them both up. EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS GLORIOUS.

Anyway, TJ, Carlos and Cassie are all tied up and Astronema!Ashley nearly zaps Andros but he turns around. Instead she convinces him that there's a battle down on earth and she ends up falling on her face. She's about to shoot him in the back where Ashley!Astronema shows up but Astronema!Ashley convinces Andros that it's a trap and they both attack Ashley!Astronema.

Andros, you are not very good at figuring out when your friends are evil. Meanwhile, Alpha is saving the day by untying the other Rangers.

Ashley!Astronema convinces Andros of the truth by asking Astronema!Ashley what Andros got her for her birthday. When she can't answer, Ashley!Astronema tells the truth causing Andros to believe her. Astronema!Ashley demorphs and turns back into regular!Astronema, and the two Astronemas fight each other. The Rangers (including the freed ones) try to figure out which one is the real Ashley, so they ask her to do the Morph call. Only the real!Ashley knows it, which makes me wonder if Astronema just doesn't pay any attention to their fights.

Astronema says she wouldn't want to be a Power Ranger anyway. AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA. UM.

Elgar tries to attack the real!Astronema and for some reason she doesn't kill him. Instead she makes the monster grow and there's a fight scene. It is luckily a very brief fight scene because so much of this episode was taken over by AWESOME. (Seriously, phallic toys, sword, missile, destruction.)

Astronema says the monster was useless anyway, and then she blasts Elgar. Yay!

Back on the Megaship, Ashley is scared to take her helmet off because she's afraid of what she'll look like. But she's Ashley again! Everyone is happy. Cassie exposits that when the monster was destroyed it switched her back. Ashley tries to thank Andros, but he has wandered off somewhere to have the saddest sad that was ever sad. Because there is someone FROZEN in a tube.

DUN DUN DUN.

QR: WELL HELLO THERE MYSTERIOUS FROZEN MAN! Complete with penis.

Fish: ONE. EVERYTHING ABOUT THIS IS GLORIOUS. WAY TO LIVE UP TO MY EXPECTATIONS, SHOW.

Fic we want: Seriously, what was Astronema!Ashley doing with the Rangers when she had them tied up? And what exactly did she do while she was in Ashley's body?