Episode 220 - Cars Attacks

In this episode, lots of people make lots of baseless assumptions!

Kat goes to the Youth Center off hours. She sees a girl doing what we think is supposed to be dancing. Dancing Girl stops when she notices Kat, packs her stuff, and leaves without saying a word. Kat complimented her dancing and she just kind of ran away. Kat assumes she has attitude. I assume she's shy and nervous around new people.

Turns out, Dancing Girl is Jenny, Lt. Stone's niece. Her mother felt she needed a firm hand of discipline before school started (so it's still summer vacation! But why is Justin in school then? He skipped two grades which means he tested academically higher than 9th... so he doesn't need summer school). Jenny doesn't know anybody, is very uncomfortable, and gets accused of everything bad that happens. Attitude problem? Sure, but it's not her attitude that needs adjusting.

ANYWAY! Kat is auditioning for the Royal Academy in London. This is a big deal! Turns out Jenny is dancing too. Kat does a lovely ballet. Jenny... doesn't, exactly. But they love her anyway. She gets a call back. So does Kat. Ooooo tension! Tanya is super supportive.

Meanwhile, Divatox gets a ring at her doorbell. Why a sub has a doorbell I'm not sure. Anyway, it's a monster who wants to work for her. He's a conductor and his music makes anything come to life. Divatox sends him to make all the cars of Angel Grove start flying around. It's... special and has very little to do with the plot of the episode.

Meanwhile, Lt. Stone discovers all the money is missing. He was trying to balance the books and wonders how Ernie did it (clue: he didn't... we have no idea how Ernie made his money, but he certainly never balanced any books). The money went missing right out from under his nose and instead of calling the police, he immediately accuses Jenny instead. Wow, way to jump to conclusions there Lt. Stone! That's just not right. She, of course, gets upset at being accused and his disbelief at her insistence that she didn't take the money, and then stomps off. I don't blame her! He confronted her in front of the ENTIRE Youth Center. There was a crowd! That's just not right.

So the rangers get called to go deal with this monster and the flying cars. They have a rough time of it and Blue Senturian shows up. There is some minimal fighting and then they blow up the monster and all is well with the world again. It was boring, but blissfully short.

The rangers rush into the callbacks because Elgar planted a detonator in the tape recorder (TAPES! OMG we are so OLD). Everybody is so used to the Power Rangers now that nobody seems to really bat an eye. Unfortunately, Jenny is in the middle of her audition when the rangers take the tape player and rush it outside so it can blow up without hurting anybody. Nobody seems to realize it was a bomb and everyone is confused at why the Pink Ranger rushed off with the music. Jenny is upset and rushes out the door.

Kat comes back just in time for her audition. She's good, but she's no Billy Elliot. I liked his Royal Academy audition much better. ;)

So it's down to Jenny and Kat. British Guy says Jenny is unique and he likes her style, but her attitude is holding her back and he won't accept her. He gives the spot to Kat instead.

Hold on a minute here. Because Jenny is very quiet. Because Jenny is not terribly social. Because Jenny was upset her audition was interrupted and her music destroyed so she couldn't finish. SHE has the attitude problem? She never said a rude word to ANYBODY. She didn't cart around as if she were better than the rest. In fact, she looked rather like she was lacking confidence in her abilities as a dancer. And SHE has the attitude problem that won't let her in the school???? W. T. F. show?!?!??!!

Kat goes outside and Jenny accurately predicts it's for the "let's all be friends, kumbaya" speech. Kat tells her she should be nicer and hello, she was never mean! She was just quiet. Jenny makes a good point that it's hard when you're new and starting over, that it's hard when you have one chance for a better life and instead of being given an honest chance, you're prejudged for EVERYTHING. Kat agrees, but then continues with telling Jenny she should get over it and she'll need all the friends she can get. I'm sorry, but NO. You don't tell the person who was wronged to get over it. And not everybody WANTS to be social.

Back at the Youth Center, Kat is considering not taking the position. She points out that Tanya gave up music for awhile to stay a ranger and Tanya makes our argument canon. She can always go back to music. Dancing is a very time-limited dream. If Kat is going to do it, she needs to do it NOW. Meanwhile, Chimpanzee Bulk and Skull come in with a wagon full of money. They'd tried to balance Lt. Stone's books for him, but had no luck either. Lt. Stone apologizes to Jenny and they share a familial hug.

4.5 fish. If you audition for a ballet school, you do BALLET. Also, what was up with that monster?

(if Kat gives up her dream spot at the Royal Academy only to give up her powers two episodes later? We're going to scream and throw things... we are left without an answer at the end of this episode)

Episode 203 - Hawaii Zeo

Today on Power Rangers - Tommy is so bad at romance, it's hilarious. Seriously, Adam is better at talking to girls than he is. How the hell did Tommy get Kim and Kat to go out with him? SERIOUSLY.

Anyway, we open with a fight scene. Previous episodes have shown that this is almost never a good thing. High fight content usually equals more fish. But this time there's something different about it - Jason is having trouble fighting three cogs. But the other Rangers help, and Kat and Tommy support Jason when his powers are beginning to fail. Tommy should totally be sympathetic and honestly, I come out of the scene wanting a Tommy/Jason/Kat threesome. Up at the Power Chamber, everyone's really worried about Jason, and also there's some explanation about how Tommy hurt his face, that honestly just makes it sound like he's covering up some sort of abuse. (NGL, I would read that fic.) Zordon was apparently always secretly worried about Jason's powers. That's news to us!

While Sprocket tricks Gasket into working with him by promising to help him grow, Rocky pulls a Zack and takes advantage of Tommy watching a Pink Ranger to beat him at sparring. The others all mock Tommy for being bad at asking out girls, as Tommy tries and fails to ask out Kat. He is hilariously bad at this. Also, Tommy, don't try asking someone out in front of all your friends.

After Kat leaves, everyone mocks Tommy, and Adam is clearly thinking "DUDE, even I am smoother than that." Tanya basically tells Tommy that he's a moron, and of course Kat will go out with him, and Tommy says something about making it perfect. Of course, at this exact moment Ernie walks in, supposedly back from Hawaii, with grand plans to host a luau. Since Detective Stone's detective agency has a lot of bills, Bulk and Skull volunteer for security, and Tommy badly manages to ask Kat out to the luau. For the record, Tanya has clearly had a conversation with Kat beforehand as she's pretty blatantly encouraging him.

At the luau, everyone moves to sit with Tommy and Kat, but Tanya is just all "DO I NEED TO THINK OF EVERYTHING?" and moves them to another table. Bulk and Skull are in horribly offensive supposedly "native" costumes, and Tanya and Ernie both call them out for being awful. Good job, show!

Ernie calls for volunteers, and when Tanya asks him to, Adam dances. Of course, they are quickly interrupted by Cogs doing the hula, which is AMAZING. Gasket and Archerina grow, and Jason handles the hula cogs while the other Rangers all summon the Zords. Of course, they still need help, so Alpha remotely summons the other Zords. The Rangers look like they destroy Gasket and Archerina, except for some reason they only shrink, and then they run away when Mondo shows up. Too bad.

Ernie is planning another luau, and he's happy that someone cleaned up everything. (The other Rangers are so great.) Tommy and Kat show up, looking very happy. Apparently they went to a dinner and the movie date. Tommy calls the date boring. Kat, that's totally grounds for dumping him. Seriously, Tommy is the worst boyfriend ever.

Bulk and Skull show up, and they still have the ink on their faces from the bad stereotypes. Oh, BOYS. *bangs head on wall repeatedly*

Fish: 4. Gasket and Archerina aren't destroyed WHY?

Episode 180 - Song Sung Yellow

It's the Adam/Tanya show, live from Angel Grove!

I love this episode so freaking much. We begin with a music video for a song (sung by Tanya) that I actually kinda like. QR was mocking my taste, but when you've seen this episode as many times as I have, the song seriously starts to grow on you. It turns out that the video was directed by Adam, but frankly, even though they talk about how great it is and how he'll be a great director one day, he shouldn't quit his day job. (Speaking of how adorable Adam/Tanya is, Tanya says he's already a great director! Clearly, she is blinded by her love for him.)

Seriously, that video looks like one of the awful videos that plays at the karaoke place I visit when I'm home in New York. Or the most cheestastic bad 90s video. (If you look at it that way, it's pretty amazing.)

And Nakia has a great voice, so at least there's that!

Anyway, it turns out that they're screening the video at the Youth Center, and Tommy has been staring intently at it. They ask what's up, and Tommy says he thought he saw something, so they pause the video, and there's a Cog in the background.

.... Are they seriously suggesting that the Rangers filmed this video and didn't notice anything, and then spent hours editing it and still didn't notice? But TOMMY notices while watching the video for the first time? That is ridiculous. Everyone wonders how often the Cogs have been watching them.

Anyway, Ernie gives them some more free food, and it turns out that before this, the Youth Center was closed on the weekends, but now they're going to be open. Billy suggests that Tanya should get to sing Saturday nights, and Tanya is excited to be performing in front of a live audience for the first time. This leads to my personal fanon that when Tanya wins her first grammy, she thanks Ernie for letting her make a fool of herself on that stage. ♥ ♥ ♥

While the Rangers are setting up, the Cogs steal everything, and they completely fail to notice. They are so oblivious, it's ridiculous. What the hell was Zordon doing during all this? The Rangers chase after the cogs (after Rocky is done accusing Tommy of losing all of it) and there's a ridiculous fight that ends with a Cog getting pied. It's pretty awesome.

Of course, it turns out that it's Sprocket's Bar Mitzvah! He's going to become a man! Mazel Tov, Sprocket! Of course, to become a man he has to destroy the Rangers, so.... ahahahaha.

On a side note, how much do I love that the early villains mostly just exist to screw with the Rangers? It's so ridiculous, I love it.

Meanwhile, at Lt Stone's detective agency, Bulk and Skull are playing ping pong for the rights to be champion of the milky way and to rule as he sees fit. Sadly, before we find out who gets to rule the galaxy, Lt. Stone shows up, setting off the alarm system that they'd set off. I love them so much. It turns out that they have their first case, and it's to investigate a phony record producer. How much do I love this? Also, Skull uses the word scoundrels. Amazing.

At the Youth Center, Tanya is performing the same song, and when she finishes, she and Adam hug! Yay! Producer Vincent Nova shows up to tell Tanya she was awesome, and gives her a card and basically says he'll offer her a deal. She gives him a copy of the music video. She's all excited, and then people ask for her autograph. How adorable!!!!!

Bulk and Skull spy on the producer, which involves Bulk getting covered in garbage.

At school, Tanya is all excited about getting the contract, and her friends are all excited about it, but they do remind her that she'll have to quit school and stop Rangering if she goes. This would have been a great time to bring up Kimberly and point out that it isn't the first time someone has left the Rangers to follow a dream, but they don't bring it up.

The next Saturday, Tanya is singing again (a different song this time!) and the producers are watching her! The Rangers all get called away when a monster attacks, but Tommy gestures for Tanya to stay and finish her song. That's actually really sweet of him. You go, Tommy! Anyway, there's a fight scene and the Rangers win even without Tanya, and the only important thing is that Kat's individual weapon is totally a kamehameha! Epic. Sprocket gets to become a man anyway.

Later, the producers are talking to Tanya about limos and things, when Bulk and Skull burst in to try and save Tanya from a fake producer. She tells them that she's turned them down, and they tell her that a) she would have been an awesome diva and b) they'll wait for a talent like hers. She totally signs the contract the day she stops being a Ranger. Also, she lets Bulk and Skull know that they're real producers, and the two chase after the producers in the hopes of getting a deal.

Tanya tells her friends that she figured out what was really important - them. And school. And being a Ranger. But of course, she can sing any time. Kim was doing something that was way more dependent on age.

In conclusion - Tanya is awesome, and she and Adam are adorable. Also, Tanya grows up to win a bunch of Grammys and probably an Oscar for best song. I am also totally writing fic about this.

Fish - 2! Just for the nonsense with the cogs at the beginning.

Fic we want - All the schmoopy Adam/Tanya in the world. And you know, Tanya and her recording contract. :D

174- Challenges

Last time on Power Rangers- the world is relying on Tommy's brainpower to save it. We're all DOOMED.

So in the Youth Center, now cleared of Native American works of art, Ernie has decided to bring in Lt. Stone, aka "The Rock", to give free boxing lessons. Adam is all "Free boxing? I'm there!" and Rocky is all "Boxing? Really? But your pretty pretty face?". But Adam goes to sign up anyway, with Tanya's encouragement. They start with the basics... jump rope. We now want a massive crossover with Jump In. We must wonder why he always wears sweatshirts (okay, TSB wonders... me, what do I know of fashion? He looks fine to me. :P) Is it because JYB did his own stunts and they were trying to cover the bruises? Such is the rumour...

Meanwhile, Tommy is on his spirit quest. He keeps trying to touch that flying falcon. Apparently nobody has told him they fly TOO HIGH for a person to touch from some rock outcrop. Oh well. He is also chasing the mysterious PRETTY PRETTY YOUNG MAN that appeared out of thin air on the MAGICAL HORSE. Have I mentioned lately how much I LOVE this show?

Adam is walking home by himself when he's accosted by the Monster of the Week. Prince Sproket has taken up boxing and they have now sent down a boxing monster... dressed entirely in blue, so clearly he's obsessed with Rocky. He attacks Adam to fight for Rocky's affection. Ranger Rule number 23, after all, applies to non-rangers after rangers too.

Adam calls for help and Rocky, Tanya, and Kat try to sneak off to go help him. Ernie passes them by with boxing gloves and gives them a look that says he clearly knows what they're going to do, but he's pretending otherwise for their sake. Aw, Ernie. Bless. So they join the fight but they still can't beat this guy. Boxing Monster and Sprocket turn Adam into an action figure sized Power Ranger trophy. Sprocket tells them if they win, they'll get Adam back unharmed in his normal size. If they lose, well. We all know what happens then.

They can't do this without Tommy (or rather, without Zords and Tommy has the only working Zord, so... yeah), so he has to leave his spirit quest to go help out. Tommy's Zord fights the Boxing Monster (who's name I cannot for the life of me remember, and I watched the episode all of five minutes ago). It's very Rock 'Em, Sock 'Em Robots. Ah, the memories of my childhood. Anyway, they win. Of course. And for some reason, Sprocket lets Adam go and he becomes actual size again.

Tommy goes back to his spirit quest where there is an earthquake. Oh, Tommy. Stop following your heart. He hears a cry for help and rushes to save the Mysterious Pretty Magical Stranger who is falling off a cliff. The falcon lands close enough to touch, but if he stops to touch the falcon, Pretty Stranger will leap to his doom fall to his death. I do love this about Tommy... he doesn't even hesitate. He doesn't angst. He doesn't question. He just dives and grabs hold of the Pretty Magical Man.

Pretty Magical Man knows all about Tommy. He shows Tommy his own half an arrowhead and, gasp, they match! The tinfoil arrowheads magically combine into one unbroken arrowhead as we learn that David is Tommy's brother. Dun dun dun!

We do not learn anything else about Adam and boxing, which this episode led me to believe it was about.

2 fish. This was also surprisingly low on fish for a Tommy episode!

Fic we want: that crossover, but also a Mystic Force crossover! Or an excerpt from Once a Ranger because... well... Adam and Xander! They can bond.

Episode 116- Ninja Quest Part 1

So I don't have the dvds of this season, and the copies I'm watching have the German title screens. Today we're watching Das Ninja- Abenteuer.

We start out at a volleyball game that involves far too much clothing. The Ranger, I mean, the Angel Grove team is trailing behind the Stone Canyon team. Ernie promises the winners free lunch at his new outdoor cafe. Adam scores the tying point.

At Rita and Zedd's palace, Zedd has blindfolded his wife and is leading her to a large present. She takes the blindfold off and he removes the cover to reveal a new telescope, which she calls a Repulsascope, in which to watch the Rangers on Earth! What an awesome anniversary present! Meanwhile, something crashes nearby. We discover it's a skeleton guy and he buries some eggs.

Back on Earth, Billy saw the flash and is distracted during the volleyball game. He misses the shot and it hits Bulk in the head instead. The Rangers gather around to discuss what happened... mid-game. The only thing I really noticed about this scene is that the Rangers, while all wearing red shirts, have colour coded their shorts to their colours, except Kim who is wearing white pants.

Back at the evil palace, the crashed skeleton flies into Zedd's throne room. He's about to kick out the intruder when Rita stops him. This skeleton is none other than her brother, Rito Revolto! We kind of love Rito. He's... unique. The eggs are a wedding present for Rita and Zedd but he won't tell them what they are until they hatch. They come up with a plan to attack Angel Grove and send Rito down in front of an army of monsters to trick the Power Rangers.

Billy scores the winning point and Ernie is so happy he offers free lunch to EVERYBODY. Oh Ernie, how do you ever make any money? So at the outdoor cafe, everyone is enjoying free sandwiches. Bulk stuffs some in his vest and we are about to get all mad when he overhears some girls talking about loving men in uniforms (though they are specifically talking about the Power Rangers), and Bulk comes up with a brilliant idea. Skull spills milkshake/smoothie/thick drink of some sort all over Bulk while trying to get everyone's attention. Bulk announces that he and Skull are going to join the Junior Police Patrol and all mouths drop wide open in utter shock. Even Skull is surprised. We, however, just love the idea. It's the start of some solid and consistent character growth for these two and we're looking forward to it.

Zedd sends down the monsters, Rito and four of Finster's previous monsters, and they all hide. Except Rito who is the decoy. He sits down in the middle of the park and waits. Zordon is actually paying attention for a change and sends the Rangers in to find out what Zedd has left in the park. They answer their communicators in the middle of the crowded outdoor cafe. Really guys? Not so much with the SECRET part of secret identities there.

So they go to the park and confront Rito, who immediate grows in a new monster-growing sequence. Rita and Zedd cross staffs and chant a spell, which makes the monsters grow. It's pretty awesome. So he's all big and the Rangers summon their zords. 12 minutes in and we get zords. This NEVER goes well when it's this early.

They fight for a minute but then the other four monsters come out of hiding and grow. The Rangers are overwhelmed and quickly losing power. Alpha takes the Power Accelerator from the fish and begin boosting the power, but it's not enough and the Power Accelerator is quickly overloading. Zordon warns that if it shorts out, the Rangers will lose their powers. We don't know how that works, but it's quickly forgotten in what I feel is one of the most emotional and well done scenes of this entire series.

The power overloads. The Rangers quickly abandon the Zords. They force demorph and just as they are trying to figure out what's going on, there are some massive explosions. The Zords are blowing up, from the inside out. They literally fall to pieces right in front of our eyes. Kim screams and tries to run for them, but Adam and Billy hold her back. It's devastating, watching the Zords just fall apart like that, and it still hurts my heart to this day, no matter how many times I've watched it happen.

To Be Continued (or in my copy, Fortsetzung Folgt)


Fish: 3, mostly for the Power Accelerator bit.

Billy speak: none, alas

Covered in food: Bulk gets covered in smoothie

Episode 80- Opposites Attract

So this is not the most memorable episode. It's already fading from my memory and we JUST watched it.

We start off with Billy speak. He's sitting at a table in the Juice Bar with Trini discussing his latest invention. He created some kind of polarity something to observe a storm they're supposed to have later that day. Kim interrupts with a single serving friend of hers named Laura. They are going to take a group of Angelettes out to the park/woods/whatever for a badge. Billy is completely smitten with Single Serving Friend. She is just as smitten with him and Trini comments on it after they leave, but Billy won't even attempt anything. He's sure they'd have nothing to talk about, what with her being the outdoorsy type and Billy being into science magazines. I kind of want to shake him a little here. Trini reads science magazines! Trini never needs a translation of his normal speech! Trini is taken with his big beautiful blue eyes and she never cared about him wearing overalls! You have the perfect girl right in front of you, Billy! Alas, she runs off in a few episodes to go to Torchwood a peace conference.

Without parental supervision, a gaggle of Tiny Female Children come into the Youth Center and help Kim and Single Serving Friend carry boxes of food stuffs outside. They are both adorable AND polite. I approve of these Tiny Children. Ernie has supplied their outdoor hiking/exploring trip at apparently no cost. Billy warns them of the impending storm. We then get a very random shot of Tommy, Jason, and Zack lifting weights. It makes no sense in context of the show, but it shows Austin St. John AND Walter Jones flexing their deliciously rippling muscles so I, being the shallow person that I am, can't really complain about the scene.

In the woods/park/wherever they happen to have gone, Kim and Single Serving Friend are explaining the goal of the trip to the girls. They are to stick with the buddy system and go exploring, but not too far, and if they get lost or in trouble they are to sit down and scream for help. Kim is actually really cute when she's explaining it, especially since she's barely taller than the kids themselves (and I can say this without it being mean because I am shorter than Amy Jo Johnson).

Meanwhile, in other parts of the park, Bulk and Skull have set up some kind of system to contact the power rangers. It looks like Christmas tree decorations. Also in other other parts of the park, Billy has moved half his lab outside. For some reason. He's fiddling with his device when Goldar and a bunch of putties show up. He shows off his awesome gymnastics abilities and beats the crud out of some putties. It lured him away from his device however, which was the main goal, and Goldar grabs it. He vanishes and leaves a very surprised putty looking around astonished until Billy vaults himself over there and destroys it.

Goldar goes back to the moon and Zedd turns Billy's device into a magnet monster. There is some confusing discussion of reversing the planet's polarity and it really doesn't make sense because, well, once again, science doesn't work like that. So this monster does his thing and all of a sudden the Earth starts shaking and people start flipping out and there is some weird little points of light in all the shots that nobody else notices. It makes no sense. Zack, Jason, and Tommy cling tenaciously to each other as they try to get far enough out of the Youth Center to contact Zordon without anybody overhearing. Bulk and Skull rejoice thinking they've contacted the rangers until they see a man in a bear suit bear, and then they run in terror. Kim has the Tiny Children stay with Single Serving Friend while she goes to "contact the park ranger". But really she just wanders a few feet away and uses her communicator to contact Zordon.

At the Command Center, they all discover the monster. They also find Goldar and some putties near the Angelettes. Billy wants to take care of Goldar on his own, to protect the girls, but Zordon won't let him. Tommy gets to do that while the others go after the monster.

All the girls swoon over Tommy while he fights some putties. He beats a few and chases Goldar away. The other rangers, downtown, confront the magnet monster thing. He does his reverse polarity trick again and knocks them all over. Polarity... he keeps using that word. I do not think it means what he thinks it means. Anyway, they don't even TRY with the voice actors and it's horrible, so I'm not terribly upset when they call the power weapons, nearly beat the guy, summon the zords, and immediately pull the thunder sword on him. I swear that fight lasted all of about thirty seconds.

Zedd, in the best line in the whole episode, laments that science and monsters don't mix.

Back at the Youth Center, the Tiny Children are still swooning over the white ranger after Kim and Laura give them bravery badges. Bulk and Skull come in muttering about a bear following them and, in a surprising amount of empathy for this show, the Tiny Children rush to comfort them. Billy then walks in with his device and Laura asks if she can see more of his inventions. We get more Billy speak than we've gotten in every episode this season combined, and then Billy gets the girl.

List time:
3 fish. Science really really doesn't work that way.

Billy speak (hold onto your butts): "It's a polarizing gauge. Scientists have predicted a rare solar storm for today."

"That would be an accurate evaluation, Trini."

"I'm collecting data on the geo-magnetic field."

"An electromagnetic phenomenon has been predicted. It could have unexpected results on the atmosphere."

"Zedd's turned my polarizer into a monster with colossal repercussions!"

"I'd be honoured. If you'd like I can start with my latest. It's a unique method of observing protons and ionized oxygen atoms."

Covered in food: nobody

Episode 71- The Song of Guitardo

I admit, I remembered absolutely nothing about this episode except for the title. For some reason, that stuck with me over 15 or so years, but the details of the plot just floated away. And part of me is very glad to have discovered this episode, and very mad at the same time. How an episode can be both rage inducing AND sickly sweet I don't know, but this one is. My poor brain, it's so befuddled.

Anyway, we start the show with Kim playing guitar in the Youth Center. Aw, a Kim episode! Zack is with her and compliments her music. She is writing a song, apparently, and in the best friendship acting of this show, she asks him for help with the lyrics. People, it is ADORABLE.

Zedd is spying, as he always does, and decides the guitar is the perfect thing to make a monster. Except, well, as Exposition Monkey Goldar points out in the only thing he says or does in the entire episode, Zedd can only make monsters out of living things. And guitars are made of wood which is no longer living. Zedd waves him off saying where there is wood, there are insects and he can make a monster out of those. Mind, guitars don't generally have insects in them, so where he came up with that, I don't know, but okay then. He somehow determines a cicada would be likely to be in a guitar (nod and smile, people, it makes this show SO much easier) and devises a spell to make Guitardo, the cicada monster.

In the park the following day, the rangers are having a picnic. Initially Intended Jason Replacement Ritchie, dressed ALL IN RED as usual (I don't think we've ever seen him NOT in red... real subtle there show), rides by on his bike. Trini invites him to join, but he has to unpack from moving. Sad.

Meanwhile, Bulk and Skull are just around the corner attempting to draw the attention of the power rangers. Bulk is dressed like a dragon/monster thing and Skull looks absolutely ravishing in a pink princess dress. He does the most amazing voice, too! Anyway, they run around screaming, attract the unmorphed rangers, get a lesson on crying wolf, and then blow them off and continue to run around screaming. It's amazing.

Just in time for the fakest insect ever to land on first Skull and then Bulk, Zedd's spell is ready! So he mumbles a bit and turns the insect into a monster, which lands right on Bulk's shoulder. Poor guys, the monsters always seem to materialize right on them.

In an unprecedented fit of actually paying attention, Zordon notices the monster IMMEDIATELY and calls the rangers! It's unheard of, this actual "looking out" business! So apparently they've analyzed the monster and are going to tell them all about it, but first Tommy has to step off to the side with Alpha to be evaluated for power levels. What, they wait until a crisis to worry about this? So much for planning. Way to ruin your moment of Win, Zordon. So apparently this monster can control minds. And has turned Kim's guitar into his weapon of mind control, as he uses music to do his evil thing. Tommy's powers aren't up to a fight, so he gets left behind so he doesn't endanger the other rangers.

So the others morph and go confront Guitardo. They try to concentrate on their own thoughts and block out his mind control powers, but they fail. Zack goes first, followed quickly by Billy, Jason, and Trini. They end up floating in the air for some reason. Because apparently this isn't really mind control and is just... um... levitation? I don't even know. My best theory is they're standing on large invisible piles of fish.

Anyway, Kim is left on her own to fight this monster. This really oughtn't be a problem seeing as she's fought solo and taken down monsters singlehandedly before. But no, instead she freaks out, Tommy morphs, and comes to her rescue. He pulls her out of the way just in time. Out of the way of what, I'm not sure, since mind control isn't really directionally based like that? But okay.

We wonder why Tommy then leaves Kim alone to go fight Guitardo on his own, because Tommy is THE MOST PRONE to mind control. He's PROVEN he's susceptible in the past. And Kim is too awesome to stand around and twiddle her thumbs! She can solo a monster and Tommy is weak and losing his powers! What the hell, show? We capslocked this for a few minutes in chat because, really? Continuity!Fail like woah. So Tommy goes to some fair thing to fight the monster, only he kind of gets taken over pretty quickly. But wait! He uses his dragon dagger and figures out music breaks the spell, so he'll fight music with music!

The mind control affects him anyway and this somehow makes him fall into an ever deepening hole in the ground. Um... mind control? How is it making a hole in the ground? Cement is not sentient. It's not even alive. It doesn't have a mind to control, so how is the hole being created? We decide it's a bunch of fish drilling into it and move on. Kim finally runs up and uses her bow as a harp to stop the monster from further sinking Tommy. She tells Tommy music will defeat Guitardo and we have to wonder how she knows this. Was she standing around watching? We like to think she was as that would hint to her being in on Zordon's plan to sabotage Tommy. We like this theory.

So Kim beats the monster by using Tommy's tiny little dagger as an arrow in her bow. I... don't even want to know how that works? Because physics? Really doesn't work like that. Like, at all. But the dagger destroys the monster and all is well, and we didn't even have a zord fight, so I'm okay with it!

Back at the Youth Center, the rangers are completing their picnic. It's apparently pouring down rain now and Ernie just let them into his food service establishment with their own food and drink, and invited them to spread out and enjoy themselves... without purchasing a thing from him. That's not the way to make money and keep your business open, Ernie. But way to be nice. Bulk and Skull come in and Bulk has his helmet stuck to his head. Billy offers to help remove it if they promise not to pretend to be in danger anymore. They promise (with fingers crossed) and Billy genuinely and nicely helps them. They barely have time to walk away before Tommy starts talking about losing his powers. Loudly. In the middle of the crowded Youth Center. Secret identities. I thought they had them?

Anyway, he fails at being Emo Ranger, and then Kim pulls out her guitar and cheers him up by singing a song she and Zack wrote for him. Aw! It's about the sweetest thing EVER, especially when Zack JOINS IN THE CHORUS! OMGSOADORABLE! I melted. The only thing that could have made me go "DAWWWW" any harder is if they'd somehow had a bunch of kittens frolicking about.

So it was both rage inducing and adorable at the same time and my head is going to explode from the contradiction.

Lists!
3 fish. Much less fishy than yesterday, though some big continuity fails there.

Billy speak: none really, though he does mention focusing on your own thoughts to block out Guitardo's mind control.

Covered in food: Nobody, but Bulk does get a monster materializing on his shoulder

Episode 52 - Two Heads are Better Than One

This episode sucked AND it pissed me off.




... Apparently I still have to do a recap. Fine. Tommy and Jason are teaching a women's self defense class. Good for them, although I would have liked Trini to have been the one teaching it. But then we get to their advice. Which apparently boils down to yell really loudly and always use the buddy system. Because, you know, if you walk by yourself you'll be raped and it will totally be your fault and WHAT THE HELL SHOW. Rage blackout number 1. (There was a lot more cursing and a lot more all caps in the first draft of this post.)

Also, apparently they're just teaching the moms of Angel Grove. Because if you're not in high school you must be a mother and it isn't like there are any single women. Or maybe they should just stay at home by themselves.

Anyway, class ends, and the Rangers all go to try Ernie's new drink. I guess all the money from the reward paid off. Bulk and Skull show up, wanting to join the class that Jason and Tommy are teaching. The boys point out that the class is over, and then Trini reminds them that it is a women's self defense class. Bulk and Skull say that they just want to meet babes, like Kimberly, and then Skull sniffs her hair, and in context it is so incredibly inappropriate that I have rage blackout number 2.

Apparently this episode is supposed to be about teamwork or something, because Rita creates a monster that has two heads, since that's better than one. They repeat that a lot. Tommy and Jason get attacked in the park and they morph. Jason wants to fight, but Tommy wants to retreat. I guess this is also the Tommy and Jason need to learn how to get along episode. Which already happened once.

So, they go with Tommy's plan and teleport to the Command Center instead of just calling for help. Apparently the way to defeat the ridiculous bird thing is to feed it a pamango fruit. Hey, guess what type of drinks Ernie was serving earlier! Gee, I wonder if this will be relevant. Tommy goes to the park to go climb a tree and find a fruit, but he gets attacked by putties and they steal the pamango. I guess that there was only one tree and that tree only had one fruit. Right. Whatever. But seriously, if it's native to Angel Grove, couldn't they have gone to a grocery store?

Instead, Tommy goes to Ernie and feeds him a bullshit story about how he bought Kim a parrot and the parrot needs a pamango. Ernie humors him and gives him the fruit (I am firmly convinced that he assumes it was for Ranger related reasons and was amazed at the sheer stupidity of Tommy's lie) and Tommy goes off to join the other Rangers, who have been fighting the monster. Apparently Jason is failing at teamwork because he didn't wait for Tommy? Because this monster is too smart for them? I fail to see how waiting for Tommy will improve their chances. Anyway, Tommy shows up with the fruit and the monster fights over the fruit. It reminds us of gooney bird eggs. Rita makes the monster grow, and they summon Titanus and defeat it. (Side note - it seems that Tommy is way more powerful than the rest of them, but isn't he operating on limited power?)

Back at the Youth Center, Ernie asks Kim about her parrot, but apparently Tommy never bothered to tell her about the lie, so she's totally confused. Bulk and Skull interrupt the women's self defense class, and it is time for rage blackout number 3. Jason and Tommy allow Bulk and Skull to be the attackers in the self defense class, and the moms beat them up. Which I actually have a problem with, because you need to learn how to take a fall, and they could have been actually hurt, and basically everything about this episode upset me.

I fail to see how the last line of "two moms are better than one" is relevant anyway. Or why this episode was about teamwork. It is now stricken from my personal canon.


Fish. FIVE FISH. Between the rage inducing and the fact that the plot made no sense there's nothing else we could give it.

Billy speak: "It's a mixture of ananas comosus, cydia fruit, and carica fruit" (seriously? Google tells us it is actually Cydia FRUIT MOTHS. I'm really grossed out now.) (We're hoping that he actually said SANDIA fruit, which is watermelon. But it sure didn't sound that way.)
"By doubling it's cranial capacity, Rita has created a..."
"Perhaps we could distract it with it's favourite food. Parrots do like fruit."

Quotable Quotes: Polly want a megazord?