Episode 152- Along Came a Spider

I hate the Zeo Quest. No, I really really HATE the Zeo Quest. Epic fail, show!

So Billy is hanging out in his garage lab at his house with Cestro and Tideus. Unfortunately, the device he's working on... isn't working. He can't figure out how to get the sub-crystals to come together. Tideus suggests they find a more powerful device and Billy explains that Earth just isn't that far along. NASA and MIT might have one, but there's no use trying them. He suggests asking around Angel Grove University since it has one of the best science programs in the country (and here I burst out laughing because really? Angel Grove's education? MUST be it's own country... only explanation). Billy heads off, but first he gets snarky and winks at them. Oh Billy and your alien fetish.

Baby!Adam has made it to what it supposed to be Korea but... well it's about as much Korea as the last episode was Mexico. Everyone he encounters speaks English. He knows he's in the past and he's where his grandmother was born. He also is seeking some wise man. How he knows this, we don't know. We're assuming the fish are strong with him this episode. Baby!Adam is met with the WORST ASIAN STEREOTYPES EVER and the rest of our encounters with him this episode leave us both in CAPS mode... rather much like the last episode did with the Mexico Fail, and rather like the next three episodes will do.

Under the Command Center, Rito and Goldar are still lost. They try to draw a map on the wall with chalk and end up playing Tic Tac Toe instead. Clearly they learned Global Thermonuclear War was a bad choice. Perhaps they'll try a nice game of chess next? Rito totally outwits Goldar and wins.

Back in CAPSLOCK, Baby!Adam is a horrible little troglodyte to an old man that is trying to help him, even if he speaks in riddles. Baby!Adam is an idiot and cannot figure out that this crazy, yet wise, old man is the man he is seeking, and so he goes around asking other people and telling crazy old guy to go away. Because Baby!Adam is a douche.

Only good thing about it is the crazy old guy keeps calling him Little Frog. Awwwwww.

Billy ends up at Angel Grove University, where he talks to a very attractive young science professor. She is pleased he's taking such an interest in science and is sorry to hear that his high school lab is ill-equipped to help him with his experiment. So she lends him THE UNIVERSITY'S PHASE MODULATOR. Dude, it REALLY doesn't work that way, okay?

So Tideus is whiny and can't wait for water, so he drags Cestro out of Billy's lab and they track water. They find it at a car wash. Somehow they miss all the water in all the pipes in the entire city, and resort to walking through a car wash. *headdesk*

Rita and Zedd send down a monster. Billy comes back to his lab to discover the power out and he's attacked by the monster, except he's in his lab and the footage of the monster is clearly it in a LARGE abandoned warehouse. Splicing FAIL! Billy is encased in spider silk and I suddenly declare him Frodo (Trini is his Samwise, Rocky is totally Pippin, which makes Adam Merry... and maybe we spent a little too much time talking about a PR/LotR AU). The Aquitian Rangers all come back and fight the spider thing. It's very boring.

Meanwhile, Baby!Adam finally figures out that Crazy Old Guy is the wise old man he's seeking. Crazy Old Guy directs him up a very small waterfall, where Baby!Adam reaches into the water and pulls out the green crystal. Really? That's it? That's all he had to do? He talked to a few people, was a butthead, and then reached into a gently flowing small waterfall. Baby!Rocky had to climb into a freaking active VOLCANO and pull his from lava... some quest this is.

So the Aquitian Rangers are fighting, and the monster grows, and they call the zords, and they win. Surprised? I didn't think so.

All the spider silk magically disappears and Billy is free. He ends up at the Command Center, where he hangs out with Baby!Rocky until Baby!Adam shows up. Rocky is excited to see him and proclaims "He shoots, he scores!" and yes, he will score, one day, when you're both grown up. Ahem.

Billy informs them the Aquitian Rangers are at the car wash again. Really? There is such a thing as a FAUCET in Angel Grove, I'm sure. It's this magical thing that drains water from pipes. It's the same water as the car wash, so they really could have just shoved the Aquitians under the showers in Billy's house and it would have the SAME EXACT effect. *bangs head against wall*

Did I mention how much I HATE the Zeo Quest?



Five fish. Just... enough with the stereotypes, okay show? Two down, three to go.

Billy speak: "I can't align the Zeo sub-crystals into a cohesive matrix, so even if we do get all five crystals, we'll never be able to combine their energies."
"Well I've always been interested in crystal energy coherence, but unfortunately the phase modulator at my high school lab wasn't advanced enough for my experiment."

Best line of the episode: Goldar: "I'm thinking!" Rito: "You must find that painful."

Fic we want: LotR/PR AU y/y/mfy?