Episode 54 - Trick or Treat

Happy Halloween! In honor of tomorrow's festivities, we're watching a Halloween episode! (Okay, so it was next on the list anyway.)

Today on Power Rangers - Kimberly and Skull participate in the world's most ridiculous game show, nobody knows what a trick question is, and everyone tries to rap!

The episode opens with Kimberly on the balance beam, and her outfit is adorable and so incredibly early 90s. She's got a giant pink headband and a pink hoodie and leggings. Oh, Kimberly. Never change. ♥ She gets off the beam when she sees Trini and Tommy and tells them that she has some news for them. I honestly thought her news was going to be that the three of them should all hook up, but instead Kimberly tells them that she's going to be on a game show called Trick or Treat. This is apparently the highest rated game show in the country Angel Grove is so its own country and millions of people will see her. Apparently if she wins, she'll get a new car.

The show will apparently be next Saturday, and Tommy sadly tells Kimberly that he won't be there, because there's an inter-city karate tournament. I guess he needs to do his part to support Angel Grove's economy, but his girlfriend is going to be on a gameshow! He should go support her! Tommy is a faily!boyfriend.

Kimberly wonders who her opponent will be, and Bulk and Skull walk in. Apparently she'll be up against Skull. If I was Kimberly, my reaction would be "yay! The car you win as a prize is totally mine!" but she doesn't say that. However, Skull ends up covered in guacamole.

Up on the moon, Goldar suggests to Rita that they grow a Pumpkin Rapper monster. I start getting flashbacks to the Almost Got 'Im episode of Batman: The Animated Series. Which is possible, since Batman exists in the Power Rangers universe. (If I point this out often enough, will someone eventually write crossover fic?)

Apparently while Rita is planting pumpkins without Zordon noticing, it's Saturday! Trick or Treat is the weirdest game show ever. The rules make no sense. Everyone is in costume (the Rangers have all gone Ren Faire, although the SCA would be horrified by their costumes). Skull is a prisoner escaped from detention, and it says 24601 on his chest, and I start flailing. Oh, SKULL. The point of the game is to ask trick questions, except nobody has ever heard of trick questions. Instead it's really just stump the host.

Kimberly's first question is "Can you tell me the identity of the Power Rangers?" Since the host obviously cannot, she gets a pumpkin point and then gets to participate in a bonus game, which involves getting strapped to the Wheel of Misfortune, which has nothing to do with the episode of the same name. Really, I don't think spinning her around on a wheel is the best idea when she's wearing a skirt.

Skull's turn. His question is "What is the name of my best friend?" Seriously, how is this a trick question? I feel that they don't know what that phrase means. The worst part is that Skull needed Bulk's help with that! He was cheating to come up with that question. Seriously, Skull, if you can make a Les Mis joke, you can do better than this. But he gets his pumpkin point, and then does some weird mini game involving a spider.

Meanwhile, Tommy is walking through the park to get to his karate tournament, and he comes upon a field of pumpkins. He gets attacked by putties. How awesome is the Green Ranger themesong? If only Tommy was as awesome as his song. He actually calls Zordon on his communicator after, and is told to go onto his tournament, and the Rangers will call him if they need him.

Alpha is sad, as he was cheering on Kimberly. If Kimberly gets one more point, she wins the game. Unfortunately, she looks into the audience and sees the other Rangers tapping their communicators urgently, so instead of just asking her last question and then winning, she fakes fainting and then the others carry her off. Skull wins the car. Amazingly, nobody tries to call a doctor after Kim faints, they just let her leave.

Okay. Here's the thing. They could have left her there to win and then called her in later, like they were doing for Tommy. Or they could have given her another 30 seconds to win the game. There was no need for her to forfeit. Fail, show!

Anyway, the Rangers all teleport to the Command Center, and Zordon fills them in about the Pumpkin Rapper. They go to the pumpkin patch, and as soon as they pick pumpkins up, four of the Rangers get pumpkins over their heads! Billy and Jason use that opportunity to end up in a fairly compromising position. Kimberly, who was unaffected by the pumpkins, shoots Jason in the head, and the pumpkins fall off. Jason makes a comment about cutting his off, and I fall over laughing.

Meanwhile, we get a fight with pumpkin putties! They are so awesome. More putties like this! After beating the pumpkin putties, they find a giant pumpkin, which they assume will be the pumpkin rapper, and they decide to wake it up. With the worst rap I've ever heard.

Kim: "T-t-t-trick or treat"
Billy: "You're incomplete"
Jason: "Til the Power Rangers you can beat"
Trini: "All you are"
Zack: "is pu-pu-pu-pumpkin meat"

Owwwwwwww.

This wakes up the Pumpkin Rapper, who I really feel should have been more like Jack Pumpkinhead. The Rangers need help, so they call Tommy just as he's about to participate in the tournament finals. Instead, he leaves, forfeiting his match to go help. Too bad for the economy. He charges at the Pumpkin Rapper while the other Rangers summon their weapons, and then they blow him up. I do love the power weapons.

The next day (we guess) Kim is sad about the car. I would be sad too! Tommy is also sad about it, we assume because he wanted to spend time in the backseat. Bulk and Skull drive up in their new car I will not make a joke about them being boyfriends when someone from the show comes and busts them for cheating. They lose the car. Part of Bulk's mummy costume gets stuck in the door. You can guess how this ends.


Fish: 4.5 I love this episode, but it makes no sense. I mean, just the rules (and I use the word loosely) for the game show. And then Kimberly not getting to finish. Seriously, fish.

Billy speak: "She seems to have experienced a slight cardiac infarction"
"It sounds as though they are devoid of any internal substance"

Covered in food: Skull gets covered in guacamole. Also, the spider spits something on him.

Pumpkin Rapper speak: "Oh you rangers make me mad, waking me up with a rap that bad"
"You think that's something you can do? Well I've got some friends who'd like to meet you!"
"Welcome to my pumpkin patch, perhaps you'd like to play some catch?
"Be the first ones on your block to feel the mega pumpkin shock"
"You cut my vine, but you're still mine"
"Better run fast or you'll feel the blast"

Quotable quotes: "Hasta la pumpkin, squash brain."

Episode 53- Fins and Needles

So the episode list has episode 53 listed as Fowl Play. Even the little title screen has it as Fowl Play. I was so so so excited to recap a Zack episode today! But no, we start it up and get Fins and Needles instead. Yet another Jason and Tommy Need to Learn to Work Together episode. Which makes number what, four, for that theme? If they haven't learnt the lesson by now, I don't think they're going to. So anyway.

Uh, today on Power Rangers, Jason and Tommy are dense, Zordon kind of fails, the rangers are creepy with small children, and Jason really needs some fiber for regularity.

We start out the episode with Tommy and Jason getting along just fine while teaching a free martial arts class for small people at the Youth Center. This is where we start going "Wait... what? Where's Zack?" And we decide we really like appreciating Jason's arms in this episode, but I would really like to appreciate Jason's arms in a Zack-centric episode. Not that I'm bitter or anything. Anyway, moving on.

Rita creates the Slippery Shark monster and has some putties go down to put Jason and Tommy under a spell. Again. They end up in a park fighting the putties when Tommy gets knocked down. Jason protects him by standing over him and catching some evil boomerang with the palms of his hands. Mmkay. Basically this means they're now under a spell. Again.

The putties leave and they start fighting. Again. Haven't we done this plot before? *le sigh*

At school the following day, Tommy is leaning against Jason's locker while talking to Kim and Trini. Jason says excuse me, prompting Tommy to move, but then they just stand there and insult each other like an old married couple. We chuckle because Tommy is just flinging crap, but Jason's insults are actually true. Kim and Trini have no clue what's going on, but soon the insults escalate into physical violence. Bulk and Skull actually sort of attempt to break it up when Mrs. Applebee walks up, asks what's going on, and then accuses them of lying when they tell her exactly what's going on. Kim jumps in and tells her Jason and Tommy were just practicing moves for their class and way to just flat out LIE to the teacher, Kim. The boys get off the hook because, well, one teacher and they're the favourites.

At the Youth Center again, Bulk and Skull are selling tickets to the Jason and Tommy fight. They're making a killing and some guy buys 20 tickets randomly. It's not a raffle, dude, it's just admission. I have to comment here that Jason doesn't look so much angry as constipated. Upon commencement of the fight, Zack steps in to try and break it up. He just wants them to get along! Sweet sweet Zack, we love you so. I wish this were your episode.

Zordon, after spending probably about 24 hours without noticing the spell, contacts the rangers. Zack manages to break up the fight long enough to get Jason and Tommy to go into the hallway and teleport to the Command Center. The very large crowd of teenagers don't notice, don't follow, but instead chase Bulk and Skull for a refund. It's either major secret identity FAIL or major teenagers are dumb... with Angel Grove, either or both is plausible.

At the Command Center, Zordon tells them about the Slippery Shark and how they need to go fight it. And oh yeah, Jason and Tommy are under a spell that makes them fight, by the way, did you notice? *eyeroll* Apparently the only way to break the spell is to get them to set aside their animosity and work together. Y'know, just like every other time this plot has been used with Jason and Tommy.

So the two of them go off to fight the shark together, leaving the others behind in the Youth Center to twiddle their thumbs, possibly find a very uncomfortable place (like the back of a Volkswagen), and observe the viewing globe.

Jason and Tommy can't seem to work together and separate to fight the shark. Tommy wants to attack him while he's under ground, Jason wants to go after him while he's in the air. They decide to go their own way and if Tommy wins he gets to be leader of the Power Rangers and if Jason wins he gets Tommy's power coin. We cheer for Jason. Loudly. Neither of them succeed, though, and after a few minutes of me going "Oh hai thar sentai footage!" (because neither Jason David Frank nor Austin St. John are that skinny and lanky), they finally decide to combine their plans.

Somehow this means throwing a net over the shark while he's popping out the ground? It really had nothing to do with their individual plans, but okay. They worked together and the spell is broken, just like that. So instead of calling for the others, they continue to fight the shark just the two of them. The others must still be busy... observing the viewing globe... possibly from the back of the Volkswagen.

Eventually they can't fight it anymore and call the others. I get excited because Zack gets to do the morphin call! We get some awesome Power Weapons shots, but then the monster grows and they have to call the Zords. The shark just kind of runs between the MegaZord and the DragonZord and they don't seem to try to fight it at all. Then they decide to go with teamwork. The MegaZord holds the shark's fin while the DragonZord whaps it a few times with it's tail. They're making headway! And we haven't even heard mention of the Power Sword yet! So I get all ahead of myself and we have this conversation:
QR: teamwork... by holding the fin so the DragonZord can whack at him for awhile?
okay...
at least it's not another "Power Sword saves them all" fight
or is it?
TSB: you were saying?
QR: oh, it is
nevermind
damn
In other words, they hit it with the Power Sword and it goes kaboom.

Back at the Youth Center, Jason and Tommy are teaching the small children in the free karate class again. Billy, Trini, Kim, and Zack are standing on the sidelines watching and talking VERY LOUDLY about Rita putting Jason and Tommy under a spell. Y'know, talking about being rangers, while standing right next to a group of kids? That's not how secret identities work, guys, I'm just saying. Bulk and Skull come in and demand the fight they feel they are owed. Jason and Tommy provoke them and then step out of the way when Bulk and Skull try to punch them. Bulk and Skull keel over and Jason and Tommy tell the kids of the class that there are always ways other than fighting. The other four are touching the inappropriately young friends inappropriately and I'm bothered.

I still wish this had been the Zack episode.

List time-
2 fish, mostly because I'm already tired of this plot, cohesive though it is.

Billy speak: "It's truly inspiring to see them volunteer their time to teach free classes."
"This confrontation could have disastrous results!"

Covered in food: nobody!

Episode 52 - Two Heads are Better Than One

This episode sucked AND it pissed me off.




... Apparently I still have to do a recap. Fine. Tommy and Jason are teaching a women's self defense class. Good for them, although I would have liked Trini to have been the one teaching it. But then we get to their advice. Which apparently boils down to yell really loudly and always use the buddy system. Because, you know, if you walk by yourself you'll be raped and it will totally be your fault and WHAT THE HELL SHOW. Rage blackout number 1. (There was a lot more cursing and a lot more all caps in the first draft of this post.)

Also, apparently they're just teaching the moms of Angel Grove. Because if you're not in high school you must be a mother and it isn't like there are any single women. Or maybe they should just stay at home by themselves.

Anyway, class ends, and the Rangers all go to try Ernie's new drink. I guess all the money from the reward paid off. Bulk and Skull show up, wanting to join the class that Jason and Tommy are teaching. The boys point out that the class is over, and then Trini reminds them that it is a women's self defense class. Bulk and Skull say that they just want to meet babes, like Kimberly, and then Skull sniffs her hair, and in context it is so incredibly inappropriate that I have rage blackout number 2.

Apparently this episode is supposed to be about teamwork or something, because Rita creates a monster that has two heads, since that's better than one. They repeat that a lot. Tommy and Jason get attacked in the park and they morph. Jason wants to fight, but Tommy wants to retreat. I guess this is also the Tommy and Jason need to learn how to get along episode. Which already happened once.

So, they go with Tommy's plan and teleport to the Command Center instead of just calling for help. Apparently the way to defeat the ridiculous bird thing is to feed it a pamango fruit. Hey, guess what type of drinks Ernie was serving earlier! Gee, I wonder if this will be relevant. Tommy goes to the park to go climb a tree and find a fruit, but he gets attacked by putties and they steal the pamango. I guess that there was only one tree and that tree only had one fruit. Right. Whatever. But seriously, if it's native to Angel Grove, couldn't they have gone to a grocery store?

Instead, Tommy goes to Ernie and feeds him a bullshit story about how he bought Kim a parrot and the parrot needs a pamango. Ernie humors him and gives him the fruit (I am firmly convinced that he assumes it was for Ranger related reasons and was amazed at the sheer stupidity of Tommy's lie) and Tommy goes off to join the other Rangers, who have been fighting the monster. Apparently Jason is failing at teamwork because he didn't wait for Tommy? Because this monster is too smart for them? I fail to see how waiting for Tommy will improve their chances. Anyway, Tommy shows up with the fruit and the monster fights over the fruit. It reminds us of gooney bird eggs. Rita makes the monster grow, and they summon Titanus and defeat it. (Side note - it seems that Tommy is way more powerful than the rest of them, but isn't he operating on limited power?)

Back at the Youth Center, Ernie asks Kim about her parrot, but apparently Tommy never bothered to tell her about the lie, so she's totally confused. Bulk and Skull interrupt the women's self defense class, and it is time for rage blackout number 3. Jason and Tommy allow Bulk and Skull to be the attackers in the self defense class, and the moms beat them up. Which I actually have a problem with, because you need to learn how to take a fall, and they could have been actually hurt, and basically everything about this episode upset me.

I fail to see how the last line of "two moms are better than one" is relevant anyway. Or why this episode was about teamwork. It is now stricken from my personal canon.


Fish. FIVE FISH. Between the rage inducing and the fact that the plot made no sense there's nothing else we could give it.

Billy speak: "It's a mixture of ananas comosus, cydia fruit, and carica fruit" (seriously? Google tells us it is actually Cydia FRUIT MOTHS. I'm really grossed out now.) (We're hoping that he actually said SANDIA fruit, which is watermelon. But it sure didn't sound that way.)
"By doubling it's cranial capacity, Rita has created a..."
"Perhaps we could distract it with it's favourite food. Parrots do like fruit."

Quotable Quotes: Polly want a megazord?

Episode 51- Grumble Bee

My little shipper heart absolutely DELIGHTS in this episode. I think I've watched it more often than any other PR episode in it's entire seventeen season run.

So we start out remembering that Angel Grove lacks quality education because Mrs. Applebee, portraying the role of Science Teacher Applebee, is handing out test results. She apologizes to Billy as she hands him his test. He got a B. He's heartbroken! Mrs. Applebee reminds the class that they need top grades to get into the Young Scientists of America Club. Poor Billy is so distraught he can't even be bothered to pick up his backpack, instead dragging it along the ground behind him. He laments his sad, sad little B and Kim attempts to reassure him that a B is still a wonderful grade. After all, she gets them all the time. He appreciates the effort, but he has apparently never in his life ever gotten a B before. I must wonder why he's not in honours classes, advanced a few grades, or gotten his doctorate by this point. Bulk and Skull are mean and tease him, but he can't even give them what for. Poor Billy is the emo-est of all Emo Rangers for just this one episode. Poor little Emo Ranger.

Jason says Billy should take a break and go play some basketball, but I have to wonder if Jason has ever actually paid attention to Billy before. Billy isn't the type to relax and unwind with SPORT. He's just... not. Trini offers to help him "study" and Billy immediately cheers up. Yes, Trini helps him "study" rather a lot apparently. He brightens up so much there is no way it's anything BUT a euphemism. Oh, I'm sorry, was my OTP bias showing a bit there? Let me just go tuck that in.

So Billy and Trini go off to "study" and we discover Billy missed ONE question on the test (what, where there like five questions on a two page test? We assume Mrs. Applebee just asks really long, drawn out questions... or can't do math). The question he missed was about bee classification in the insect kingdom.

Meanwhile, Jason, Zack, and Kim are playing basketball. Putties attack, of course, and we get some really awesome moves from each of them using the basketball as a weapon. Normally fight scenes bore me, but this one was pretty good. They seem to have a handle on things when Goldar shows up with more putties and the Glowing Rope of DOOM. The putties overwhelm the rangers and manage to tie them up. Kim is so little she could probably just slip down between Jason and Zack and get out, but she doesn't even try. It's okay. They all seem to have a thing for bondage on this show. We understand why they don't try too hard to get away.

Rita has sent down her Grumble Bee monster while Jason, Zack, and Kim are all tied up. Zordon was actually paying attention for a change and contacts Billy and Trini about the Grumble Bee and the tied-up rangers. Trini calls out the morphing call and off they go to fight! Together! Just the two of them! They confront the Bee and have a short conversation about the people in your neighborhood. They fight and Billy is weakened by the venom. We then discover the Grumble Bee has some kind of ultrasonic waves that overwhelm them. They bravely run away.

Back at the Command Center, Zordon tells them they have to fight the bee while Alpha tries to break through the Glowing Rope of DOOM to set the others free. Jason reassures them it's the right thing to do, so back to the fight they go. Grumble Bee shoots them with highly toxic... uh... silly string. Billy is affected, but he manages to continue to fight. Meanwhile, Alpha narrows some sort of beam and manages to cut the Glowing Rope of DOOM so the others join the fight. He then gets back to work on some sort of weapon. Apparently it's a case of battery-in-backwards again and he flips something around to finish the weapon. It looks just like a Super Soaker. He sends it to Billy while the others are incapacitated and Billy uses it to shoot foam all over the Bee. Apparently, it really is a Super Soaker.

Rita says, oddly, "Make the monster... giant." for a change. The Zords are called, they get the MegaZord, and then the Bee shoots them with that ultrasonic crap again. He looks more like he's doing the Care Bear stare than anything else. The MegaZord needs more power, they call the Power Sword, the Bee says it probably isn't real, and then he gets blown up good and proper. End of fight.

Back at the Youth Center, Jason and Zack both have pretty arms while sparring. Tommy shows up in a random five second appearance. Apparently he's been restoring the Angel Grove economy by winning a karate tournament. And then Billy comes bouncing in. No, literally, he bounces. He apparently got an A+ on his test and has been admitted to the Young Scientists of America Club. As if there were any doubt. Trini is very proud of him. Bulk and Skull are apparently flipping out at a table, both studying very hard. Skull is so stressed he's tearing pages out of the book and TSB and I flail and bite our hands and can't really handle this part. Books! You don't do that to books! NYAH! Bulk says if he doesn't get a C on the next test, Mrs. Applebee is going to make the six students with the highest grades tutor him all summer. Uh... I don't think she can just volunteer people like that? And way to punish the kids that actually do their work. Anyway, Zack counts the six rangers and then they all rush to attempt to help Bulk and Skull study. Skull is still tearing pages. I'm very bothered.

Lists!

2.5 fish.

Covered in food: nobody

Billy speak: Lots, though most of it's borderline.
"I'm most perplexed. I've never received a B before."

"I appreciate your efforts, but acceptance into the young scientists of America club is very important to me."

"It's a term which defines a specific order of insects, such as bees."

"The ultrasonic waves are too powerful. We have to find the monster's weakness."

"The venom is highly toxic. It's eating through my suit."

Episode 50 - Return of an Old Friend Part 2

Hey, Tommy is in the credits! We're officially back in the Green Ranger era. Oh well.

Back at the Command Center, Kimberly asks what good Tommy's coin will do. Alpha says that they've located their parents, but... we'd already seen that! Why is this news? It isn't like they can teleport them out.

Tommy gets teleported to the Command Center, and Rita gets the best reaction shot on her face ever. But Rita decides not to worry that much, and instead decides it is time to conquer Earth once and for all.

Jason gives Tommy his coin back, and Tommy is all "WTF is going on?" We skip the explanations, and Tommy asks how that will work. Zordon says that he'll infuse Tommy with his own energy, but Billy says it's dangerous, and we find out that the powers could fail at any time. Tommy says he'll take that risk.

Cut to Goldar summoning Dragonzord and destroying part of Angel Grove. How is Tommy supposed to get control of his Zord back anyway? Billy tells us that if Zordon drains too much of his energy he'll cease to exist. Seriously?

Tommy is all "Whee! Powers!" Oh, the shield of cheap bling. We've almost missed you. but not quite."

Goldar and Tommy start fighting, and for some reason the box containing Power Coins appears. Why would Goldar do that? I mean, seriously! Tommy gets attacked by Putties, and it is a pretty nice fight scene. But then Tommy falls down, and Goldar taunts him. Zordon's energy level is apparently dangerously low. Jason tells Alpha to turn up the power, and the shield of cheap bling glows. Tommy's powers start to fail, and he reaches for the box of power coins. He doesn't manage to get that because it electrocutes him or something, but he does get the Dragonzord. Goldar and Scorpina grow, and seriously, the Dragonzord is awesome. For all I can't stand Tommy, I love his Zord. Plus, Scorpina. She's awesome.

Also, the song is nice. The music for this show is fabulous. Zordon starts fading out, so Tommy has used too much power or something. They're going to try to bring Tommy back. Just as Tommy's powers fail and the shield of cheap bling glows menacingly, Tommy grabs the power coins and then passes out in the Command Center. Kimberly kneels by his head, and I'll refrain from commenting on that.

Alpha and the other Rangers come up with a plan to bring Zordon back. They're going to combine their power coins to infuse Zordon with energy, and apparently Zordon is Captain Planet! Seriously, they call on their combined powers.

Now that Zordon is back, Rita attacks. Zordon tells them that if they destroy the monster, their parents will come back. They all morph and go fight the monster, which emits gas from its armpits. Eww. Everyone but Kimberly ends up under a spell.

Back at the Command Center, Tommy starts levitating and glowing green. This is never a good sign.

The Rangers are all apparently Zombies under the spell, and they start lumbering towards Kimberly yelling "attack the Pink Ranger." Tommy apparently is electrically charged, and that restored his powers? Whatever. Fish. He morphs and that causes a giant lightning storm that breaks the spell? I don't even know. I guess it's because he's the most special Ranger ever or whatever.

Rita makes the monster grow, and it really looks like a less hairy ROUS. They summon the Zords and it's suddenly night out. Good thing Billy fixed that powered by the sun flaw. I really want a Dragon Dagger. I hope they sell one in the new toy line. They summon Ultrazord and blow up the monster. Rita has a headache.

Back at the Command Center, we find out their parents have been freed. They're probably worried about where their kids are. Even if supposedly they remember nothing. We get warned that Tommy's powers could fail at any time, but he will remain a Power Ranger anyway. At the Youth Center, the Rangers hug their parents and tell them how much they love them. The thing with Kimberly's divorced parents was actually really sweet. And then she introduces them to Tommy.

Bulk and Skull decide to start a food fight. Everyone gets covered in pie. Ms. Applebee gets her revenge on the principal for not hiring another teacher by getting him. The Rangers make stand in the hallway and laugh.


Fish: 3.5 It does have Tommy, and the whole thing with his powers makes very little sense.

Covered in food: Did you see the part about the food fight?

Episode 49- Return of an Old Friend Part 1

So it's Parents Day... at the Youth Center? This appears to be a school function but isn't being held at school. Okay then. Jason's dad loses arm wrestling to Trini's dad. Billy's dad informs us that Billy is running late because he's busy with an experiment. Zack's dad is a nerd and his mom is adorable. Meanwhile, Skull is documenting Parents Day. Bulk and his entire family, overweight mom skinny dad, come in a little late. They appear to crash into the Youth Center, startling Ernie, who then sits down on a table and sends a cake flying. Of course, Bulk and his parents get covered in cake.

Kim's mom and step-dad show up looking for Kim, Kim's dad then walks in, and a random blonde girl says Kim is outside. Trini goes to get her.

Rita has come up with an awesome plan! She will kidnap the parents and expects the rangers to surrender in order to get their parents back. This is actually a good plan and I can see how it just might work.

Trini finds Kim outside all upset and worried about her mom and dad being there together. She doesn't think her dad will show up at all, but Trini reassures her they're both inside looking for her. Putties attack just as they have a touching moment. Zordon actually notices for a change and contacts Jason and Zack, who rush outside to help while Alpha contacts Billy.

I have to stop here and wonder something. There are massive windows on the Youth Center and nobody notices the rangers outside fighting? Ever?

Rita sends her Drammolemonster to tunnel under the Youth Center. It kidnaps all the parents.

Billy shows up late and wonders where everyone is. The floor cracks and smoke comes out, putting Billy under a spell. Rita tells him to bring her the Dragon Dagger, so he teleports to the Command Center. Billy is HAWT when he's evil (he calls Alpha "a poor excuse for a transistor radio"!) He takes the dagger and leaves to get it to Rita in the dark dimension.

The others finally notice their parents are missing. Jason contacts Zordon immediately! With the communicator! He remembered!!!!!! Way to go, Jason! They teleport to the Command Center and start flipping out. Zordon tells them to calm down and that their parents are safe for now. Trini asks about Billy and Zordon tells them he's under a spell, deactivated Alpha, and stole the Dragon Dagger. Trini reactivates Alpha, despite her uncertainty at her ability to do so.

They morph and go after Billy in the dark dimension. Goldar is there and taunts them, then sends putties after them. How in the world were they able to just teleport in like that? I thought this was supposed to be some kind of inescapable prison that they always manage to escape from after twenty minutes of angsting? Billy falls down and Goldar steps over him, not even taking the dagger. He's apparently trying to get to Jason, but Zack gets in the way, then Jason finally reaches him. They do seem to continue that unhealthy obsession with each other. Billy watches it all.

Goldar takes the dagger and the spell is broken. Billy freaks out, Jason reassures him, and Goldar mocks them. He then tells them they have until an hourglass runs down to hand over their power coins to get their parents back. They all manage to leave the dark dimension just as easily as they got in. Way to fail at inescapable prisons!

Goldar calls the DragonZord with the dagger. They summon Zords. We get the MegaZord. It's a freakishly long Zord sequence. They start to fight the DragonZord, run out of power, and then get thrown from the MegaZord pretty much immediately. That... was fast... and made no sense. Mmkay then. Goldar tells them to turn over their coins or lose their parents forever.

They contact Zordon, but he says he can't tell them what to do. Fail as a mentor! So they all hand over their coins, fearing for the safety of their parents. Did nobody stop to think that without the protection of the Power Rangers, everybody in Angel Grove would pretty much die anyway? Poor Billy feels incredibly guilty. Jason sounds medical-attention worthy constipated when he tells Goldar to give them their parents back. Goldar refuses, shuts the box, and leaves. Why are they so surprised? It's not like he's a truthful, trustworthy, honourable monster.

Zordon teleports them all to the Command Center and they have another little angsty freak out. Kim says Goldar has all the power coins and now what will they do? Jason says "Not all of them" and holds out the Green Ranger coin. We get a shot of Tommy walking into the Youth Center wondering where everyone is.

And then that wonderful "To Be Continued" flashes over a freeze-frame of Tommy.

List time!

4 fish. Just because of severe lack of logic.

Covered in food: Bulk, his mother, and his father

Episode 48 - Plague Of The Mantis

Trini is learning Mantis Kung Fu from a random master. She is not very good at it. The most honorable tradition is a fair fight - go in equal numbers. The random master gives her an actual preying mantis to observe.

Bulk and Skull are watching, and they start calling what Trini is doing "Bug Fu." Then they decide to go find a bug of their own to imitate, so that they can charge people to learn from them. Then Bulk gets covered in a milkshake.

Rita decides to send down a mantis monster because of what Trini is learning.

The other Rangers are watching, and Jason says they might all have to learn to keep up with her, but Trini is really struggling with it. Zack is scared of the bug. We're amazed that they remembered. They ask why Trini wanted to learn, and she says because it emphasizes fairness. Apparently it is a REAL challenge not to cheat.

Bulk and Skull show up claiming to be masters of the mystical cockroach kung fu. Zack is freaked out, and Kimberly is disgusted. Skull asks Kimberly out, and she says she doesn't date bugs. Bulk and Skull demonstrate their "skills" and then the Rangers run off to go to the library.

Trini is in the park practicing, when Zordon calls her and says that there's something suspicious in the park. She goes to look, and sees the Mantis monster. It actually looks like one! We're impressed. She tells Zordon to call for backup, and then morphs.

Trini is getting beaten up, and then the other Rangers show up. The monster says that Trini has no honor, because they attacked it with unequal numbers.

Back at the Command Center, Trini feels awful because it's like they cheated. But as Zack points out, it is a MONSTER BUG. So, I don't even know. Trini goes to the Youth Center to practice, where a note mysteriously appears for her. She reads it and leaves, but doesn't take the note. The note turns out to be from the monster, who offers Trini the chance to redeem her honor by fighting individually.

The other Rangers read the note, and decide to investigate. They run over to the quarry, even though they have teleporation abilities. On the way, they get attacked by Putties while Trini is fighting the Mantis. Trini starts to win, so the Mantis brings in a bunch more putties. Trini asks the monster about its honor, and it points out that it HAS no honor, it is one of Rita's monsters.

Zordon finally decides that he should tell the others that Trini is in trouble, so even though they haven't finished with the putties yet, they morph and go join in. I wonder what happened to the putties. When Trini sees them she lets the Mantis know that now it's a fair fight.

Rita makes the monster grow, and we get a long Zord summoning sequence. Trini tells them to watch the Mantis' footwork, and also that it will concentrate all of its energy on a quick single blow. Even with watching its feet, they get hit pretty quickly, and then summon the power sword. They actually fight with the sword for a minute, instead of just using the finishing move. But then Jason decides he's had enough, and the bug gets squished.

Back on the moon, Rita is beating her minions with her wand. At the Command Center, Zordon congratulates Trini, and Billy can't keep his hands off Trini.

At the Youth Center, most of the Rangers are watching Random Reporter guy talk about how awesome they are, while Trini is practicing with Master Li. She's much better this time. Bulk and Skull are trying to charge $50 an hour for lessons, and then they manage to break the jar with cockroaches, and Bulk gets covered in roaches, while the Rangers point and laugh. Eww.

Fish: 2. They remembered that Zack is scared of bugs!

Covered in: Bulk gets covered with cockroaches. EWW. Also, a milkshake.

Billy speak: None! *sadface*

Episode 47- Reign of the Jellyfish

This episode made no sense. And it's not because we watched it at 8:30am because I've been up for hours and already had my caffeine. The episode... just didn't make sense. This would have been a beer-worthy episode. Except it's 8:30 in the morning.


So we start the episode with Ms. Applebee standing by a giant clear plastic ball. It's apparently a time capsule they will be burying. She has asked everyone to bring something to put in the time capsule. I'm trying to remember they're in high school here, but I'm failing at that.

Jason puts in a trophy. He says something about it representing physical fitness or strength or whatever? But I totally miss it because I'm so distracted by his arms. His very pretty pretty arms. Kim puts in a pink shirt to represent individuality and fashion. Ms. Applebee puts in a picture of the Power Rangers. We don't know where this picture comes from, but apparently they just pose for cameras at random with the power weapons? It's special. Anyway, moving on, we find out Zack is putting in a cd of music, Billy is putting in a personal computer he designed with all the latest software (so they can see how advanced their technology was... but by the time they dig the capsule up, it will be horribly outdated), and Trini puts in the newspaper from the day. The newspaper is called the Angel Grove Clarion, just for future reference.

Then Bulk and Skull come in. They want to put a sandwich in the time capsule. Not just any sandwich, but a special sandwich they call the Bulkwich. Nobody points out that said sandwich would be rotted, disgusting, and contaminate everything else in the time capsule. Instead they just laugh when Skull squirts mayonnaise all over Bulk. Ugh.

Meanwhile, Rita, who stalks the rangers and knows everything, wants Squatt and Baboo to go down and steal the time capsule so they can put a picture of her in it. She wants to be immortalized too. She also commands Finster make her a monster and he decides the Jellyfish will be a good one for this occasion.

Back at the *ahem* high school, Billy informs the girls they have the highest grades in the class so the five of them get to bury the time capsule. Are we surprised? Not really. They go to the park and find the designated location for burial, made obvious by the large sign on a pole in the ground that says "Time Capsule Here" with an arrow pointing down. There are no reporters, no teachers, no adults present at all. Nobody is documenting this time capsule burial in any way, shape, or form. Which is very convenient since they then get attacked by putties. David Yost really shines in this fight and he does some awesome moves with a shovel in hand. He was almost enough to distract me from the glory that is Jason's arms. Almost.

Squatt and Baboo get the time capsule and take a look inside. Apparently the very preppy, very pink shirt Kim put in is considered "grunge". Um. No. I was grunge. That wasn't grunge. Moving on, they start to take the capsule away but get confronted by the rangers. They freak out, drop the time capsule, and teleport away

Rita has sent down the Jellyfish monster thing which does not even remotely resemble a jellyfish. Zordon finally notices something is amiss in Angel Grove and calls the rangers. Way to be late to the party, Zordon. Though the rangers just went back to burying the time capsule and didn't bother to contact Zordon themselves after being attacked by putties and Squatt and Baboo trying to steal the time capsule, so this is an all around everybody communication fail.

We recognize the voice of Looks-Nothing-Like-a-Jellyfish and discover he's the same voice as the Cardiotron, Eye Guy, King Sphinx, as well as a bunch of others we haven't gotten to yet.

They go straight to the Looks-Nothing-Like-a-Jellyfish and discover he can spit venom that goes straight through their suits. They go immediately to the Command Center but it's okay because Alpha, in the five nanoseconds between realizing he could penetrate the suits and the rangers showing up, has created a coating for the suits that will keep out the toxin. Well okay then! Perhaps he lives in his own little time warp. Or something.

They go BACK to the Looks-Nothing-Like-a-Jellyfish and he now has a bunch of Super Putties helping him out. They do an alright job fighting, but Looks-Nothing-Like-a-Jellyfish uses an umbrella (a pretty little pink one to boot) to deflect the weapons. Yes, an umbrella. To deflect weapons. But wait, dear readers, it gets BETTER!

Looks-Nothing-Like-a-Jellyfish SPINS the umbrella and sends the rangers to an alternate dimension! That's right, he can somehow do that. Did I mention he can teleport around too? What can't this monster do? Except look like an actual jellyfish, of course.

So they're in this alternate dimension and they are confronted with a see-through non-corporeal version of Looks-Nothing-Like-a-Jellyfish. He can hit them, though. Even though he's non-corporeal. Nod and smile, dear readers. We did. A lot. So Billy theorizes that Looks-Nothing-Like-a-Jellyfish is actually time fazed and tells Zack to hit him with his canon. We don't know why this is supposed to work, it just is. And so Zack does. By doing so, everybody is pulled out of the alternate dimension. Fishy fish looks-nothing-like-a-fish!

Rita makes him grow, they call the Zords, and they fight for a bit. Then they call the MegaZord. Then they fight for a bit. Then they win. Surprised? Yeah, neither are we.

Back at the Youth Center, Ernie rewards the rangers with five cold glasses of something to drink, on the house, because they worked hard to bury the time capsule. Bulk and Skull come running in with a very large sandwich, apparently the Bulkwich. They've finally finished making it, but Jason informs them the capsule has already been buried. Still nobody mentions rotted food. In disappointment, Bulk and Skull drop the sandwich on their heads and then get in a food fight. Everybody laughs.

The rangers hope for a future free of war, crime, prejudice, and a bunch of other stuff that is very noble, but not likely to happen... though I certainly wish I could live in the Star Trek Utopia. And that's the end of that.

List time!

4 fish, solid. It was just... it made no sense.

Because we are recapping during the day right now, Emo Kid is around and watching. This episode gets a special Emo Kid Rating of "fun".

No Billy speak really.

Covered in food: Bulk in mayonnaise and then Bulk and Skull in sandwich.

Fic we want to read: SPD traveling from New Tech City to Angel Grove (can't be that far away, they both suffer from geography making no sense) to dig up the time capsule. Hilarity should ensue.

Episode 46 - To Flea Or Not To Flee

We open in the Youth Center. Zack is collecting donations, and amazingly, he isn't wearing any black. We're almost too busy being shocked by this to realize that Zack is collecting donations to save the Youth Center. Apparently it's going out of business. We have two theories on this. First, we haven't had a martial arts tournament in a while, so maybe the boys should get on that. Alternately, the Rangers could just start paying for their food and drinks. That would probably help them.

Jason walks in carrying a puppy. We're confused as to why he's carrying it, but he's showing off his arms nicely, so we can't really complain about that. Plus, the dog is really cute. Puppy! Meanwhile, at the high school, Bulk and Skull find a reward poster for the dog. Gee, I wonder how the Youth Center will be saved? Skull also has really ridiculous hair.

Up on the moon, Rita has found footage of a monster that can be used! Or else the Zyu2 footage arrived. We really need to watch Sentai. Maybe in 2015 after we finish RPM. Rita is having Finster use the monstermatic machine to create a Fighting Flea, that actually just looks like a lobster. Squatt is all excited, and actually says that "it's launcheroonie time!"

Back at the Youth Center, Ernie is being really nice, and the Rangers keep going on about how they can't let him close. Just pay your damn bill, Rangers! Jason realizes that he should take the dog for a walk, and Kim volunteers to go with him. So Jason carries the dog out to the park. It's called a walk, not a carry. But it shows off his arms, so.

Rita zaps the dog with the flea monster, and Jason then starts itching. While he's being distracted by itching, Bulk and Skull steal the dog, as they want to claim the reward.

Goldar starts monologing about how now it is time to destroy the Red Ranger. Oh, Goldar, you are a little obsessed, aren't you?

Putties show up to attack Kim and Jason, and as soon as the Putties touch Jason, they get covered with fleas. They stop fighting to go fall on the ground and start itching. Kim and Jason realize that something is wrong, so they go to the Command Center, where Zordon provides Jason with a temporary antidote. If he comes back in contact with the monster, he will start itching again. Jason starts admiring his arms and the giant rash that covers them.

Bulk and Skull call the number for the reward. They have to go to a phone booth. Which... oh my god, we are SO OLD. Just as they start calling, Rita has the flea monster jump off the dog, and it attacks them. It sounds just like Alvin from Alvin and the Chipmunks.

The Rangers split up. Jason and Kim go to look for the dog, Billy goes to create a better antidote, and Trini and Zack go to the Youth Center. The Flea monster goes to attack Jason, because he thinks he's tasty. We can agree with that. As soon as the monster shows up, Jason starts itching, which apparently means he has to start doing flips. IDK.

The other Rangers show up, and there's a giant fight in a junkyard. I feel as though they should be singing and then turning into children. Yes, this is just an excuse to link to High School Musical. Do not judge us.

Billy has found an antidote, so Jason stops itching, and then Rita makes the Flea grow. For some reason, the fight is in slow motion. Hmm. I guess they had time to kill.

After winning the battle (Power Sword for the win!) the Rangers go back to the Youth Center, where Ernie is feeding the dog chili. The dog's owner shows up, and thanks them for finding Pierre, and asks who to give the reward to. The Rangers say Ernie, and then they can keep the Juice Bar open! I still don't see how this fixes Ernie's problem, especially when he immediately gives the Rangers pizza and soda on the house.

Bulk and Skull show up, still itching. Billy wonders if he should give them the cure, and so they go and give them FLEA COLLARS that they have to wear for a WEEK. OMGWTF WHY ARE THEY SUCH BULLIES?!

Fish: 3.5 This was ridiculous.

Billy speak: "Ernie's operating expenses far exceeded his revenues."
Trini Translation: "He's broke." (Seriously, Kim needed that translated?)

Covered in: Bulk, Skull and Jason get covered in fleas.

Episode 45- Crystal of Nightmares

Just a note: We were previously using the Ranger Central episode list and they have just recently updated their order. We were out of order. So now we're trying to get it back in sync. Oh, and I has a TSB! In person! At my place of residence! So this is LIVE capping. :D

So we're up to Crystal of Nightmares now. The best part of this episode is the homoerotic pillow fight between Jason, Zack, and Billy. Aw, boys.

So we start off with Trini and Kim stressing over an upcoming major science test. Billy, Jason, and Zack, however, are relaxed and have sly smiles. They've plotted something. Cheating off Billy perhaps? They certainly look like they have nefarious plans. But no, actually it's just that Billy's uncle has given them use of two of his cabins for the weekend and the rangers are going to spend all of it studying. (TSB says "studying" is clearly code for something else.)

Bulk and Skull snoop on the rangers and then get covered in bird poop. It's more than a little disgusting.

So they go up to the cabin and spend some time lounging around studying. Eventually they decide to take a break and have dinner. The show FAILS by having Jason want a big burger, Trini want Chinese food, and Kim requesting only a salad. Way to stereotype, show! Zack throws us for a loop by asking if they can have liver. Liver? Really?

Meanwhile, Bulk and Skull dress up in drag and put on maid uniforms to sneak into the rangers rooms. They're looking for the science notes. Bulk starts digging through bags while Skull actually cleans. We learn Bulk is allergic to dust, and then the rangers come back. Bulk and Skull hide under Jason's bed. The boys bid the girls goodnight (immediately after dinner? What are you, two?) and then Zack shows off. He dances. For Billy and Jason. It can only be described as he's putting on quite a show for his boyfriends. Billy sits with a pillow on his lap (ahem ahem) and then throws it at Zack. The most homoerotic pillow fight ensues. It's spectacular.

Then they all just... go to bed. We can't complain too much, however, because Zack is wearing the tiniest of tiny shirts and Jason is shirtless. Mmmmboys. I, uh, could pause it right there for awhile. But alas, the recap must go on, despite the pretty pretty boys (and Jason's really nice arms).

Goldar is in a cave while everyone sleeps and he's using the Crystal of Nightmares, all glowy and covered in lightning, to give the rangers nightmares. He's going to use the nightmares to take away the confidence of all the rangers. Although we question the viability of this plan. I mean, Billy never really had self confidence in the first place? But okay, we'll go with it, because we're still happy about the homoerotic pillow fight. Though we are forcibly reminded of the Mirror of Regret. Yes, we know it technically hasn't happened yet in canon. We don't care. Wibbly wobbly timey wimey... stuff. Nod and smile.

The nightmares consist of flashbacks. Billy flashes back to the Terror Toad. Zack flashes back to his birthday and the Nasty Knight. Kim dreams about being trapped in a bottle during her Really Bad Day (but at least they cut out her screaming for Tommy). Jason's nightmare is being trapped in the dark dimension where Goldar did inappropriate things to him. Trini's nightmare is the rangers getting covered in something that looks like silly string and we cannot for the life of us figure out which episode it's from. Any ideas?

Bulk and Skull, meanwhile, are asleep under Jason's bed and they dream about being food-related superheroes (enough with the fatphobia show) and they pilot the MegaZord. Then they crash. And somehow this is a nightmare.

Then all the rangers have a communal dream that Zordon takes their powers away. They freak out and in the morning they act as if they're still terrified. Kim is even hesitant to open the door for the boys. You would think they'd all be relieved to wake up and realize it was just dreams? But apparently not. Zordon, now that it's morning, FINALLY notices Goldar is using the Crystal of Nightmares. Zordon!Fail! He contacts the rangers and tells them the only way to regain their confidence is to destroy the crystal. They all freak out and he teleports them to the cave anyway. We get the shot from my icon (aw, icon!) and then they all have to fight a bunch of putties. They suck. It's like Day of the Dumpster all over again.

Billy cops a feel on Trini and then Jason runs for the mouth of the cave. He gets in and is confronted by Goldar. He fights him and manages to destroy the crystal and suddenly they're all confident again. That's it? Really? Wow was that easy. Although I won't complain too much because Jason looks really good in that shot. Austin St. John? You were a very attractive young man.

They beat the putties and then Goldar and Scorpina go after them. They don't even get a hit in before Rita makes them grow and then we get yet another extremely long Zord summoning sequence. They get their asses handed to them but then Jason calls on the Power Sword and, withing two or three hits, Goldar and Scorpina go running.

Meanwhile, Bulk and Skull are awoken by the real maid and they start screaming because it's time for the test. They take off at a run and then we see everybody the following day. Mrs. Applebee is sick so Principal Caplan is handing out the graded tests. Seriously, Angel Grove High, hire another teacher okay? Having two AND a principal won't kill you, I promise.

The rangers all get A's, of course, and then Bulk and Skull get called to the front of the classroom. Principal Caplan humiliates them in front of the entire class by showing everybody their F's. He then gives them detention forever. Um... wow. If any staff member did that to MY kid, I'd take it to the highest authority I had to in order to get an apology and action taken against said staff member. That's just not okay. But we're supposed to think it is, and then Bulk sneezes and blows off Principal Caplan's toupee. Oh show. Fail a little harder.

List time!
2.5 fish. It was overall relatively consistent, but we couldn't identify Trini's nightmare episode, Billy never HAD self confidence in the first place, and then the outrageous behaviour of Principal Caplan in regards to Bulk and Skull.

Billy speak: none really... he had a few lines that were borderline, but nothing I considered overly intellectual.

Covered in food: Bulk and Skull get covered in bird poop, which isn't food, but it had to go somewhere. Ew.

Schedule and status update

Hey guys, this is just a quick good news/bad news post. Regretfully, there will not be an actual recap today. TSB has company in from out of town and I have a home full of ill people. Life is getting in the way of recapping today, so my apologies!

There is good news, however! TSB will be making the trek to visit me next weekend and you can be sure there will be LOTS and LOTS of recaps then! You can expect more than our usual Saturday update then.

Now, not wanting to leave you with nothing, I've gone and been nerdy. I've managed to work out a Ranger Recaps Timeline. I'm not sure there is anybody else here quite as nerdy as I am when it comes to maths, timelines, and schedules, but just in case you were curious when we'd get to a certain season or your favourite part of Power Rangers history... well... here you go.

This is based off calculations of two episodes per week with the multi-part episodes done all on one day, with no further breaks, or at least playing catch up to where we should be when there is a break. This is also assuming the movies will get their own special recaps and are not counted in the standard episode count. We haven't decided that part yet, so this is speculation.

This is just an estimate based off somewhat dubious maths. Do not hold us to these dates due to marathons, in person super recaps, or breaks in the standard schedule due to life. They are not set in stone, but rather a general guideline.

MMPR season 1- should be finished by mid-to-end next month, if we get in about 6 episodes next weekend.
MMPR season 2- will start end of November, 2009
MMPR season 3- will start beginning of April, 2010
Zeo- will start beginning of July, 2010
Turbo- will start beginning of December, 2010
Space- will start end of April, 2011
Lost Galaxy- will start mid September, 2011
Lightspeed Rescue- will start early February, 2012
Time Force- will start end of June, 2012
Wild Force- will start end of October, 2012
Ninja Storm- will start beginning of March, 2013
Dino Thunder- will start mid June, 2013
SPD- will start mid October, 2013
Mystic Force- will start beginning of February, 2014
Operation Overdrive- will start very beginning of May, 2014
Jungle Fury- will start very beginning of August, 2014
RPM- will start mid November, 2014

Based on this timeline, if we don't stray at all, we will recap the final episode of RPM on Saturday February, 14, 2015.

So. We'll be here for the next 5 and a half years. I hope all of you will join us for the ride.

Episode 44 - Rita's Seed of Evil

Today on Power Rangers - It's Tentacle Porn Time!

We start our episode in science class, which is apparently taught by the principal. Angel Grove really needs to hire another teacher. Perhaps one who is aware of educational standards. Because their big project is to plant a tree.

Bulk and Skull come into the classroom, and they claim that they're going to show up the Rangers. They unveil a much larger tree, and Kimberly inspects them, sees a tag, and suggests that they'll have a much better luck if they weren't plastic. Bulk yells at Skull and tells him that he was supposed to take off the tag. Apparently Skull is making a habit of sabatoging Bulk. I'm wondering if he's doing this on purpose for the way Bulk treats him. Bulk tries to chase Skull and ends up getting covered in paint.

Rita decides that if the Rangers are into plants, then she'll just create one of her own. A giant plant that will have such giant tentacles that it will crush the Earth. Amazing.

The Rangers go to the park and plant their little trees. Billy apparently has special fertilizer that will make the plants grow better. Oh, Billy, I'm sure that you grow the best grass, really. They go off to get water.

Bulk and Skull are apparently desperate to get a better grade, although it's amazing that they care at all. Rita sends Squatt down to plant the seeds of the Octoplant (best. name. ever.) Bulk and Skull run into Squatt, literally, and then they go hide in a port-a-potty. Disgusting.

The Rangers see Squatt running away, so they run after him, and they are attacked by Putties. It's a decent fight - Kim and Trini teaming up is always awesome.

They get summoned to the Command Center after, and Zordon is still trying to figure out the plan. Kim calls what's going on Rita's latest temper tantrum, which is a pretty awesome description. Jason is still worried about their plants, so he goes off to the park again, where we discover that the plants are now glowing a sparkly purple. He tries to grab it, which is not such a good idea, considering sparkly and evil. Jason is promptly molested by tentacles, and I spent the next five minutes laughing my ass off while my roommate is confused as to why we're watching tentacle porn. The other Rangers go to rescue him. They try and touch the purple electric glowy plants again, and Rita sends down Goldar and Scorpina. They also send down a weird looking black putty that we assume might have been a monster. It was odd.

The monster blooms, and it doesn't quite look like the giant tentacles that are supposed to squash the Earth. There is a pretty big Zord fight, and somehow the monster decides to stop fighting and go stare in a window.

Back at school, Bulk and Skull show up all covered in garbage. They'd been picked up still in the port-a-potty and thrown in a dumpster. Mr. Caplan yells at them both, and then smells them and passes out. My roommate starts staring at me like I'm crazy for watching this show. Seriously, MMPR. Fail more.

Fish: 2 fish. There was tentacle porn!

Billy speak: "She's mostly composed of vegetable matter so our weapons have little effect."
"My special fertilizer will enhance the growing process."

Covered in: Bulk gets covered in paint. Bulk and Skull both get covered in garbage.

Episode 43- Lions & Blizzards

Okay, I went into this episode incredibly angry from having watched the character assassination and intensely disturbing plot point from RPM not even an hour before this... and that has somewhat affected my recap. Apologies in advance.

We start this episode at the Oddball Games. We're not sure why they're called that, but okay. All five rangers are on the red team and we seriously couldn't tell Jason was wearing a jersey... it matched his shirt, shorts, shoes, and SHOELACES. Even his shoelaces are bright red.

On the blue team are Bulk, Skull, Angela, and other people we don't know. They end up in a tug of war to break the points tie and, of course, the rangers win and Bulk, Skull, Angela, and Principal Caplan (who was playing referee I guess) end up covered in mud. Zack, after previously trying to convince her to go to his "winning" team, offers to help Angela up and I was rooting for her to pull him into the mud with her, but she didn't.

So the rangers win the Noble Lion Trophy. They go to collect it only to discover that it's been taken. They immediately suspect Bulk and Skull. We get a little irritated but it turns out it was Bulk and Skull. They have it in the park. Rita turns it into a half lion, half goat monster, and it attacks Bulk and Skull, knocking them into the pond. The monster is named Goatan, but we spent the whole episode thinking it sounded just like a Dragonball Z character. So take that for what it's worth.

The rangers separate to go in search of Bulk and Skull and instead end up being attacked by putties. We have to commend Billy here. He has really improved. He holds his own against four putties on a playground. The putties then just randomly disappear. They decide they need to run off and meet up with Jason and Kim. Instead of using communicators, y'know, those things Billy designed to communicate with the others over long distances, yeah, instead of using those, they take off running. Oh show. Fail a little more, okay?

Later, at the Youth Center, Zack calls Angela a "babe-a-saurus" and I want to hit something (I told you I started this recap ANGRY). Angela then walks up to him wearing what looks like something you'd find a cheap hooker down on the street corner, and asks him on a date. What? Earlier, at the games, she turned him down and now she's asking him out? Make less sense, show, I DARE you.

They go to the movies and then Billy and Trini come into the Youth Center wearing bad weather gear... a mix of snow and rain type jackets and hats. Ernie announces they're under a tornado watch and everybody needs to get to the basement. Meanwhile, Zordon calls the rangers on the communicators and they teleport to the Command Center. From the middle of the Youth Center. And it's not like it had been awhile since people went to the basement either. Secret identities, guys, you're doing it WRONG! Zordon sends them out to fight Goatan, and we discuss DBZ again.

Zack, at the movies with Angela, tries to pull the "it's cold in here, let me wrap my arm around you" bit and we want to pound things because he's being sleazy (and hello, started the episode mad at power rangers already, sorry). Zordon tries to contact him but Zack doesn't hear it.

In battle, the rangers are kind of failing a whole lot. Goatan gets them in some tornado thingy and then Zack finally hears his communicator. Angela asks what it was and Zack says it's his popcorn alarm. Seriously, Zack? Popcorn alarm? What, pager, medication alarm, or needing to pee really not working for you or something? Wow, that was just... stupid.

So Zack joins the fight and apparently Goatan ruining his date is worse than his friends being in trouble. Mmkay. I could thwap him right now, I really could. They fight a little. An aside, here, because this fight is very boring and kind of fishy? But I stopped mid-fight and declared this episode would be ten times better if the lion part of the monster suddenly got very hungry and just nommed down on the goat's head right below him. That is the only thing that could have saved this episode. Alas, it didn't happen.

So they end up needing the Zords, of course, and they can't beat him and he freezes them. The controls are frozen as well, but Zack says the left tread isn't frozen and he can spin them. So he does. Despite the controls being frozen. We determined they must have included a "fish in the system" during building of the Zords, just for instances like this one. They beat Goatan really easily and then go back to the Command Center to talk for awhile. Zack then remembers he was on a date and needs to get back to it lest Angela get mad. Gee, you think?

He comes in at the end of the movie with two big buckets of popcorn and Angela, being the smart girl we knew she was in the first place, dumps her bucket on his head and walks out. Good girl.

Back at the Youth Center, Ernie is hanging a plant with help from Kim. Why, I don't know, he just is. A police officer walks in with Bulk and Skull, covered in mud, and Jason identifies them as swamp monsters. Way to sass the police, Jason! I'm sure that's going to go over well. Bulk flails a bit, knocks into Ernie, and gets covered in water. There was a frog in his shirt. Oh show.

2.5 fish. It really wasn't that bad, just the monster fight was weird and Angela asking Zack on a date totally contradicting previous canon.

Billy speak: "[something unintelligible] most effective against our adversaries."

"This is a decidedly large expanse to cover."

Covered in food: Zack gets covered in popcorn (and lots of people get covered in mud).

We have vowed to never watch this episode again.