Episode 78- White Light Part 2

I hate this episode. I really really hate this episode.

So we get the best opening shot ever, and that's the only good thing in the entire episode. We open with a close up of Billy's gorgeous gorgeous eyes looking through the grate over the secret room where Zordon and Alpha are creating the white ranger. They can't hear him talk for the fish in their ears, and he leaves to go tell the others.

Back in Billy's garage, he tells them about the new ranger. Instead of being all excited and "OMGSOAWESOMENEWRANGERYAY!", they're being emotastic and worried. They don't want somebody new intruding into their group and they feel it's a slap in the face to Tommy to give somebody else new powers. Uh, did nobody stop and think that hey, rather than tell yet another person their secret identities, Zordon just might, possibly, be making this new power for, gosh, I don't know... Tommy? Really? Nobody came to this EXTREMELY LOGICAL conclusion? Apparently not, because everybody is really depressed and even Jason, in his cautious optimism, just looks constipated.

Meanwhile, in Skull's garage/basement/wherever they happen to be, Bulk and Skull are still trying everything they can think of to open the space dumpster. Skull gets an idea and drags Bulk off to Ernie's. They head off, and Rita lifts the lid from inside the dumpster proclaiming her need to get out of there. Uh... if Rita can open it from inside, why can't Bulk and Skull lift it off from outside? And wouldn't there be some kind of magical lock in place preventing Rita from lifting it from the inside? Doesn't that defeat the purpose of locking her up in the first place, if she can just throw off the lid and walk away at any time?

In Billy's garage, they've all been pacing and looking sad. Zordon finally contacts them to tell them about the new ranger, and they all teleport to the Command Center to listen. They still look upset and I just don't get WHY. So Zordon calls down the white light and the white ranger comes floating down from above. It's very dramatic-Jesus-like and I want to slam my head against something repeatedly. He takes off his helmet and Billy smiles and says he can't believe it. Really, Billy? In your super intelligent overly logical brain did it never once occur to you who would be in that suit? *sigh*

And then we see Kim faint. Nobody else sees her faint, but she faints. She FAINTS people. She sees Tommy and PASSES THE FUCK OUT. This is why I hate this episode. Does she, the one who has beaten more monsters on her own than the rest of the team combined, not have the fortitude to STAY CONSCIOUS when surprised with Tommy? SERIOUSLY? WHAT THE HELL SHOW?

(and now that I've rewritten that four times and calmed down enough for just that bit, I'll move on)

So then we see that it's Tommy in the white ranger outfit. Well colour me surprised. Or not. Everybody is all excited and shocked and acting like idiots. Tommy pushes them aside because nobody else saw Kim faint, but he's worried. He calls her princess, lifts her from the ground, and tells her to wake up. And miraculously, she wakes up. And can't believe it's Tommy. She's sure she's dreaming. I bruise my forehead slamming it against the desk. Luckily I thought to move the keyboard out of the way first.

Zordon then tells them that Tommy was the obvious choice to be the NEW LEADER of the Power Rangers. Hold the phone! New LEADER? Leader? Really? What, Jason suddenly isn't capable? He's not good enough anymore? Tommy is infinitely better at being leader than Jason and so he gets to just usurp the role?? WHY? I can see Tommy taking over once Jason leaves and the Stone Canyon Trio move in. But right now? While Jason is still doing an awesome job of being leader? WHAT THE HELL SHOW?!?!??!!

Luckily they cut back to Bulk and Skull before I can YET AGAIN go into rage blackout. Bulk and Skull are using a massively large can opener trying to open the dumpster. We can only assume Ernie had such a large can opener because he needed it to open the massive tin of fish it took to create this episode.

So back at the Command Center, Zordon appraises them of the monster and some putties, Rita getting out of her dumpster, and the need to go take care of this. Oh but wait, the zords were damaged and Billy didn't fix them. Zordon sends Billy and Trini to go fix the zords, Tommy to deal with the monster, and Jason, Kim, and Zack to deal with a bunch of putties. So Tommy jumps around, his zord damages a lot of land, and we meet Saba, the talking sabre. I like Saba. He can be annoying, but I don't care. I like him anyway. So Tommy kind of fails at controlling his zord and it falls over. He makes a comment about having never had a partner before so they'll just have to learn to work together. Excuse me? Never had a partner before? What, did you beat all those monsters in season 1 and the first half of 2 all on your own there, Tommy? Nobody else helped you? You didn't have multiple learn to cooperate already episodes? *sigh*

So he eventually figures out how to work the zord and then he makes it fight by doing martial arts in the cockpit. It's ridiculous, but not quite as bad as firing weapons inside equating to firing weapons outside (I'm looking at you, RPM). Tommy really sucks at this and then somehow ends up on the side of a mountain. I don't even... whatever.

Jason calls his zord and we wonder a)how the zords were fixed so quickly and b)who told Jason. But apparently both happened because Jason goes to fight alongside Tommy, and ends up with his thunderzord riding Tommy's zord. Oh show. They battle in a pathetic jousting match and then separate to combine with the other zords and form a new Megazord. The new Megazord can shoot Kim's zord at enemies with effects reminiscent of Tron. And now I want to go watch Tron. They win the battle, the Megazord and Jason's zord shake hands for some reason, and then we cut back to Bulk and Skull.

So Bulk and Skull eventually collapse from the effort and while they aren't looking, Rita throws off the lid and climbs out of the dumpster. She yells at Bulk and Skull and they pass out from fright. But alas, her escape isn't meant to be because the rangers are there too and they put her back in her dumpster, toss the lid back on haphazardly, and then leave with the dumpster. The boys go send it back into space while Kim and Trini hang out in Skull's garage/basement/whatever. They wake up and nobody questions why Kim and Trini are there, but whatever. The girls are mean about Bulk and Skull hallucinating a little witch.

At the Youth Center, they are having a surprise party for Tommy. They talk, loudly, about Tommy being a ranger again and Jason gets confused when trying to compare Tommy's surprise being more surprising than their surprise party. In walk Ritchie and Curtis. Ritchie has apparently won a trophy at a martial arts tournament that none of the rangers took part in, and the Angel Grove economy keeps on spinning. He shows off some moves for them and manages to kick a large sheet cake that Ernie just finished decorating. It goes flying and lands on Bulk and Skull, who just walked in. They promptly turn and walk right back out while everybody laughs at them.

*sigh* Did I mention I hate this episode?

List time:
5 fish. There isn't enough gefitle fish in the world to explain away this episode.

Billy speak: borderline, but the closest we get is "All the energy is being concentrated into the creation of a new Ranger."

Covered in food: Bulk and Skull covered in cake.