Saturday, November 2, 2013

Episode 362 - As Time Runs Out

Hey! I made my minimum word count for nano already today! I am rewarding myself with recaps. So let's do this.

So the Queen is annoyed with her son for failing, and decides that Vypra and Loki should be in charge. It's not like they haven't failed a bunch too. Of course, Olympius has overheard this.

He decides to try and then talk to Vypra and Loki and call for a truce. Because they need to work together or something. Of course, its a trap and he seals them underground, because seriously, who would actually trust him. Morons. These villains aren't very smart. Cue theme song.

Olympius tells the Queen that the Rangers destroyed them, and she tells him to revenge them, because nobody destroys demons and gets away with it. I so don't care about these villains.

Some demon finds... something? I don't care what. But the Rangers go to investigate a disturbance in that area. Chad finds something, and its a hand buried in the ground. Because Kelsey is ridiculous, she tries to touch it. Carter warns her it could be a trap, and hey, some vines have wrapped around all their wrists. In an hour apparently the vines will open and will spray poisonous spores all over Mariner Bay. That's a better plan than exploding feathers, probably.

Vypra and Loki manage to free themselves. The two of them swear revenge on him, and walk off while debating all sorts of plans to get even.

Back at the base, Ms. Fairweather tries to destroy the flowers by shooting lasers at it, but with no luck. Kelsey suggests isolating them, but apparently the spores are too small and can't be contained. However, a lab on the east side has a poison that might destroy it. However, right when they're about to destroy it, the monster shatters the poisons. (And they didn't bring backups why? Idiots)

Carter then is all "Hey, what about solar zord?" So they get into the zord, and send themselves to outer space Well, they're willing to die to protect the planet. I'll give them credit. AND THEN THEY OPEN THE SHUTTLE DOOR AND SUCK OUT THE POLLEN BUT ARE SOMEHOW NOT DEAD.

Um. Um. Um. WHAT NO.

Space doesn't work like that. SPACE DOES NOT WORK LIKE THAT.

Kelsey nearly gets sucked out but they manage to hold her and I'm just in an incoherent rage of space doesn't work like that and seriously they are idiots. The doors close before Kelsey gets sucked out and everyone is fine, and then the monster tries to destroy the city himself. I'm still stuck on the science fail.

Anyway, then the rangers morph and we get a fight scene, but I'm busy screaming about all the fish and finding it hard to care. Carter does give a very nice red rangers are determined speech, though. So they blow up the monster and then it grows, so they call the toys. Then they blow it up.

Vypra and Loki are exploring some old ruins, and they find a tomb. Apparently there's someone in the tomb that could help them. And then we see that RYAN is spying on them. RYAN. HI RYAN. Be pretty and take off your shirt, will you?

Loki and Vypra go down into the tomb. Vypra reads the ridiculous inscription, they throw a rope into the tomb, and Diabolico climbs out of the tomb. They plan to destroy Olympius and reclaim the star power.

Ryan has really nice arms. I've missed him. That is the most important part of this episode, clearly.

Fish: FIVE. SPACE DOES NOT WORK LIKE THAT

Episode 361 - Yesterday Again

Today on Power Rangers, it's a much less amusing with no lesson learnt version of Groundhog Day!

We start with Carter failing to fly. He jumps out of his ship and lands... on the clouds? It's totally a simulation. At least they test stuff? Although they don't give a lot of training or time, seeing as they're testing Carter's ability to fly this thing and expect him to fly it for realsies THE NEXT DAY. Joel attempts to be nice, but it just comes across as condescending (or his jerkiness has tainted my view, whatever).

In the mess hall, everyone is confident in Carter. He is Pouty McPouterson and doubts himself while Dana tells really terrible jokes out of the newspaper. I LOVE HER SO MUCH YOU GUYS. Kelsey learns the valuable lesson of NOT rollerblading in the house, because she knocks over a big bowl of breakfast and she, the cook, and the floor are covered in oatmeal. Oh show. We're never going to get rid of that covered in food footnote, are we? At least Chad and Dana help her clean up. I'm sure Joel and Carter would have, but they had more important flying things to do.

Carter still fails. I'm wondering if the problem isn't with the jet instead of Carter. He seemed to be doing just fine when the jet engine started sparking. While he's attempting to NOT BLOW UP, a monster attacks and the rest of the team have to go out and stop it. While he tries to fix the jet. Since when is Carter a mechanic or an engineer? I thought he was a firefighter. He's certainly no Damon!

He morphs, jumps back in the jet, and rushes off to go help his friends, leaving his jacket behind to dramatically flutter in the wind. It's all slow motion and ominous and SUPER DRAMATIC and I love it. He's too late though, showing up just in time to watch his friends get blown to smithereens.

And then he jumps out of the simulation to find Joel standing there telling him he's okay and he'll be ready to fly for real tomorrow. Except he's very concerned because he thought Joel was dead. And nobody seems to think that's strange? What is this magic? It's as if science took a holiday and now Carter is living the day ALL OVER AGAIN. He answers Dana's really bad joke. He dramatically turns as Kelsey dramatically blades towards the chef and then dramatically stops her from spilling oatmeal everywhere. He tells Ms. Fairweather he's concerned he's reliving the same day over again and all she can say is "Simulations can be disorienting." I THINK THAT'S A LITTLE MORE SERIOUS THAN DISORIENTING, MKAY???? And he is CLEARLY not fit to fly, but they're sending him out anyway.

While fixing the power circuits, again, he spies his Dramatic Jacket from his previous day. He determines he traveled through time and that's why he relived the day over again. This... makes no sense. Science is taking a MAJOR holiday here. This is not how even the most unaccepted views on potential time travel work. He rushes off to his friends again and shows up in just enough time to stop them from being blown to smithereens. This time.

Carter uses missiles to attack the monster and manages to do loops and tight corners and amazing tricks in the jet that JUST MOMENTS AGO HE COULDN'T FLY SO BADLY THAT HE BROKE THE ENGINE. That's right. He's now an expert. And apparently the monster can fly because he's chasing Carter in the jet. Carter makes a daring high speed escape. Monster grows. Zords come out. Big fight. Whatever. I'm so done with this episode.

In order to fix the jet, Ms. Fairweather had to replace basically everything. All the circuits. All the fuses. All the everything. But it won't give him any problems now, apparently! Joel gives him the hat. He pulls it off way better. End credits. FINALLY.


5 fish. Just... no.
Covered in food: Kelsey, a chef, and the floor absolutely pasted over with oatmeal.

This is getting the dramatic cape tag because seriously... that dramatic fluttering jacket was the only good thing about that episode.