Episode 319 - Mean Wheels Mantis

Wow, this episode was a) dull and b) makes no sense. A whole episode about getting a new toy, with nothing else to offer. I apologize in advance. Recapping races (of the non-wacky variety) is really dull. We get a shot of some mountains, and the geography of this colony still makes no sense. Maya is, for some reason, up a tree, and having a conversation with her fugly zord. She insists that talking to her zord is easy, and starts pulling a Pocahontas listen with your heart thing. Meanwhile, Trakeena has a new monster courtesy of Deviot, and he's really annoying. He's a Mantis on a bike, and seriously, I wonder how the colony manages to keep rebuilding all the buildings that are destroyed. I mean, its not like they have unlimited resources. They are on a space ship. Maya and Kendrix show up and fight him, and the girls are pretty awesome! Just as the other Rangers show up, Maya and Kendrix get turned into trophies. Mantis is all "Won't change them back unless you beat me in a race" and at least this episode is giving me an excuse to link to Wacky Races. The boys start chasing him around the dome, and seriously, the geography of Terra Venture makes NO SENSE at all. The monster is, of course cheating, and Kai gets knocked out by a rope placed on the road. Damon gets taken out by some falling rocks, so only Leo is left. Leo and the monster fight and the monster manages to beat him via more cheating, and the monster vanishes with the trophies of Maya and Kendrix. Leo is blaming himself for this, even though a) monster cheated and b) Damon and Kai also got knocked out. Damon is all "our bikes are trashed, we're screwed" and he also insists that its too dangerous. Of course, since Damon is also Miles O'Brien, he will come up with something brilliant. But really, he is only one man, and he can only do so much. The Fug Zords try to talk to Leo, and somehow he understands that they're telling him he needs more power? Or something? So he takes his bike (which is fixed, because Damon is brilliant) and goes to find the monster. Leo puts up his saber as the stakes for the race. The monster continues to cheat by shooting at him and jumping on his bike and just generally cheating. But Leo thinks about his friends and listens with his heart and somehow that makes his bike morph into a new bike. I... am not sure how listening with your heart manages to create a new bike that can also turn into a fireball but whatever, for Power Rangers, this somehow makes sense. I guess. The fish did it or whatever. Damon is really impressed with the bike, and I still have NO IDEA HOW THE BIKE WAS CREATED. Anyway, since this episode is even more about selling toys than normal, we get the zord fight on top of the buy the shiny new bike toy propaganda. Leo tells Maya that he learned about the cycle from the beast, and then tells her a story about baby galactabeasts, which is adorable, but also bullshit. Basically, Leo's whole plan boils down to keeping his fingers crossed and hoping for the best. I bet he supports the Chudley Cannons. And then the team has an orgy. Fish: Five. Seriously. What. This was the most blatant "buy the new toy" episode in a while.

Episode 318 - Blue to the Test

So. We took a bit of a long break there. Neither of us were in a terribly good place and something had to fall, so this community was it. But we're doing (mostly) better now and so we're back! We thank those of you who stuck with us through this and we hope to maintain a more regular schedule again. So we're back on the space colony. Kai is working diligently, plotting courses and making plans and just being a badass. The commander is trying to get Kai to think for himself, to teach him and help him grow as a person, so he gets Kai to admit that changing course now would be more beneficial than waiting. He'd adorably overcautious and I applaud his forethought. Kai is so smart. Meanwhile, Trakeena can't understand her own science nerd, but she listens to him anyway. She's going to plot to get the Rangers to burn up in a star. She's cool like that. We get to see the Commander's daughter again (yay continuity! Although the actress looks like my sister-in-law so it's a little weird at the same time) and she's drawing a picture of her father. It's cute and sweet and he is appropriately impressed. And then there's a monster attack! Because Tiny Children must be put in sort-of danger in this show. The Commander hides his daughter and rushes out to start getting people out of the way. He gets shot with an arrow and won't wake up while his Tiny Child cries for him and awwww my heart just cracked a little there. The rangers rush in to help and Tiny Child still cries for her Daddy and completely ignores them. Because she's a good little girl. Her father wakes up but is clearly not himself. Instead of suggesting he go to the med bay to get checked out, they just walk away. He throws his little girl off and then steps on the picture she drew. She is very sad. Poor Tiny Child. Back at the Command Center, Kai is ordered to shut down engines "to conserve power" and he starts to argue, but the Commander tells him not to think and to just follow orders. Kai shuts down the engines but he clearly knows something is wrong, to the point that he burns dinner later (and tries really hard not to say "shit" and says "shoot" instead). Leo asks if something is bothering him, he admits there is, and Damon is all "Well worry about it later. I need to eat, bro." Mostly we just want an entire show of Cooking with the Rangers. Back at the Command Center, Kai is told to plot in a course that will send them straight into the star. The Commander plays it off as gravity giving them speed and Kai stands up to him. He knows his science and actually refuses a direct order, because it will save the ship and everybody aboard. He is then suspended from duty. And some random guy changes the course that Kai wouldn't change. Why does nobody else stop and say "Hey wait, let's just check his math, mkay?" Seriously people, trust your Blue Rangers. They are (usually) the smartest. Kai FINALLY figures out that the Commander is probably possessed and decides to follow him around. TOOK YOU LONG ENOUGH, GUYS. Seriously. Kai sees him talking to a monster and just confronts them without calling for backup or anything. Kai is a terrible spy. But we get an unmorphed fight and it's great! Mind, Leo and the others have to step in to save his ass, but that's okay. Kai runs off to stop the Commander and the others stall the monster for him. Kai stands up to him and it's GREAT, though he really ought to explain plans to his team first. I suppose he didn't really have time this time? Still, would be a good lesson to learn. Kai has an awesome unmorphed fight with the Commander and I would approve of nearly an entire episode like this. Kai is such a badass. Mind, the Commander is kicking his ass, so we have to wonder if he got enhanced skills due to the spell? Or maybe he's just that good with his military training. The rangers all get together to fight the monster and they call out all the toys and it's kind of boring. But there is archery, which is cool. Even if it's plastic and fake. They win. Of course. We'd expect nothing less. Big fight over, Kai and Mike rush to check on the Commander. Spell broken, he's himself again and can't remember a darn thing he just did. Kai gets him back to Command and they're able to stop the ship from plummeting into the red giant star. Kai takes his position back and they change course at the last minute, just breaking free of the gravitational pull. Kai is playing with Tiny Commander Spawn and she rushes to her father when he pulls up. He's sad he ruined her picture so asks her to draw him another one. Then he gives Kai a present! Because Kai saved the day and was willing to disobey orders to do it. So he gets a new uniform and put in charge while the Commander takes the day off. Hahaha, not so sure how that's a present, but he seems proud and happy, so it's all good. Everybody waits for his command and then applauds him and he still gets to be in command, because he is AMAZING. 3.5 fish. Not too bad, but really it shouldn't have taken them THAT long to figure out something was wrong. And somebody, somewhere, should have changed course before the ship got that close to the star, especially after the Commander left.