Episode 210 - Transmission Impossible

So, as previously mentioned, Tanya's summer job is working as a DJ on KAGV radio. She's actually fairly good at it, and she has her own show and everything, instead of just doing the usual intern hell where you just bring someone coffee or whatever. Kat comes to visit her at work (and wow, the clothes are really bad this episode) and somehow the radio station picks up a transmission from some alien who wants to contact Dimitria.

Let me get this straight. Angel Grove's radio station can pick up the signal, but Dimitria didn't pick it up? That is... man, I miss Zordon. Let's just leave it at that.

Divatox decides that if this signal is so important to Dimitria, then she's going to capture the guy before Dimitria can hear the message. She's also going to plant a detonator at the radio station. Oh, and the monkeys figure that if they can get on the radio, everyone will hear their explanations and the Rangers will help them turn back into humans.

Kat is all ready to run off to the Power Chamber, but Tanya is stuck at work. I guess missing class was ok, but missing work is not. Adam is also at the Power Chamber, doing the tech stuff, because he's awesome. Dimitria manages to contact the guy (Visceron) who is from her home planet, but unlike her, he doesn't have to phrase everything in the form of a question. I like him better than Dimitria already. He has important news for Dimitria, but he's afraid someone else is listening, so he can't tell her until he gets to Earth. Of course, Divatox promptly kidnaps him by tractor beaming him from warp? Fiiiiiiiiiiiish. And then she decides to break him by having Porto brainwash him with a water gun and make him do the dishes. I wish I was making this up. (I also wish I could brainwash someone to do the dishes.)

Tanya is still at the station, and her Turbo Navigator picks up the detonator, but she can't leave and for some stupid reason she can't contact the Power Chamber. (I refuse to believe that the radio station could block their signal. That is STUPID.) So instead, she just assumes that they're listening to her radio show at the Power Chamber, and dedicates a song to the power rangers called "I need you now" and drops a hint about it being the bomb, and the others figure it out. Oh, and Kat gets to say Shift Into Turbo instead of Adam. I approve.

Adam, Tommy and Justin handle Pirahnatrons while Kat goes to get Tanya, who is just pacing back and forth instead of doing something. Then she puts on a really long song so she can go join the others. And.... she didn't just do that before? Whatever.

Visceron has been turned into a monster, and they fight him, and he eventually ends up with the detonator, which explodes in a small enough space that only he is affected. Then he turns back into Visceron, and all of the Rangers feel really bad. But don't worry, because Dimitria saves him with the power of love.

He wakes up, and tells Dimitria her records have been altered and she has a twin sister. Apparently, power Rangers, REALLY likes the long lost sibling trope. This is the second time we've had it, and it's not going to be the last.

Anyway, Tanya forgot about her job, but don't worry, her job is safe because the manager knows she's a Ranger the manager thinks its really funny that the monkeys were DJing. Bulk and Skull just saved Tanya's job.

Fish: 3.5 SPACE DOES NOT WORK LIKE THAT. Also, Tanya is not going to forget her job.

Episode 200 - Another Song and Dance

*stares* Wait. WAIT. Episode 200? Did we really hit 200? When we started this nearly two years ago, I don't think either of us actually expected that we would keep going with it as long as we did. But it has been SO MUCH FUN and we're seriously looking forward to the next 500+ episodes. :D

So, we begin with Tommy dancing. Or something that's supposed to be dancing. It's really just him gyrating on the couch and kicking his feet in the air with some martial arts thrown in. Tanya comes down the stairs and sees him, and clearly is wondering if he's been brainwashed/under a spell/has finally cracked. Tommy seems very embarrassed, and if he was, then why was he practicing in school in full view of anyone? It turns out that his lip syncing performance was actually him practicing for music class, where he has to sing.

Hint: Tommy, lip syncing is not actually singing.

Tanya agrees to give Tommy some singing lessons, probably in the hope that she will never have to see him do that again. Ever.

Out on the lake, Bulk and Skull are on a male bonding fishing trip with their fake!daddy. He's given them some sort of nonsense explanation about how catching criminals is a lot like catching fish, but not to worry, he has a secret weapon. I don't know why they need a secret weapon to catch fish in Angel Grove, the city is full of them.

Meanwhile, the Machine Empire plans to combine these two things by a) turning Lt. Stone's secret weapon fish bait into a monster and b) placing a spell on Tommy and Tanya that will make them sing everything. Supposedly this will alter their telepathic links to the Zords or something, but personally, we believe that the real purpose is to drive the other Rangers crazy.

Because Tommy? CANNOT SING.

Anyway, this is one of the worst plans ever, but I so don't actually care, because it's hilarious and one of my favorite episodes of all time.

Tommy and Tanya's singing is so ridiculously over the top and dramatic and the other Rangers are all cringing and it's GREAT.

While Tommy and Tanya are singing their explanation to Zordon, the fish bait thing has been transformed into a giant caterpillar monster, and well... you might want to get out of the water.

The Rangers are clued into some serious destruction of the city, with Cogs blowing apart buildings and everything. Of course, Rocky then informs us that this is the abandoned warehouse district, and I spent the next few minutes laughing hysterically and trying to figure out how Angel Grove functions. We guess that after the first few attacks from Rita the city created a protective barrier of abandoned buildings for monsters to squash or something.

Meanwhile, Adam asks if he can pilot Tommy's Zord, because he's that awesome. Jason stays with him, while the other Rangers morph (and Tommy and Tanya sing their morphs. SO GREAT) and go fight.

This is actually a pretty cool Zord fight, mostly because the monster looks like it's right out of Labyrinth. The cogs are even attacking the Zord Bay! I mean, this is pretty epic destruction, it's great.

While Alpha changes the link so Adam can pilot the Red Battle Zord, we figured out that we're recapping Ranger of Two Worlds on Wednesday, and then there were EPIC TEARS. At least that explains where Billy is, but some in universe explanation would be great.

Adam goes and beats up the robot, but apparently Tommy's mental state is too foreign, so he loses control of the Zord. The other Rangers also lose control of their Zords which... leads to the Zords dancing? Why is there a Zord shaking its ass at the camera? NO, SERIOUSLY.

Everyone gets thrown out of their Zords, and there's a fight, and Tommy vs Archerina was pretty great. The monster gets destroyed, and while Machina is sulking about it, Mondo comes back.

At the Youth Center, we discover that Tommy got an A on his assignment. .... Really? Did his teacher give him the A to make him stop? Rocky tells Tommy that he's glad that Tommy stopped singing because he couldn't take it anymore.

Bulk and Skull come in, smelling like fish. They say they never want to see another fish again. Boys, I suggest moving far away from Angel Grove. Then they are incredibly rude to Emily, who unveils Ernie's new fish special.

.... What sort of juice bar serves fish anyway?

Fish: 4. How on earth does singing alter a telepathic link?

Fic we want: PEOPLE MAKING FUN OF TOMMY FOREVER.

Episode 192 - The Lore of Auric

Warning, rage blackout ahead.

SO, we open in a poorly disguised Indiana Jones movie, with two people running from machines, where they end up in a cave, and basically go about proving themselves to be the worst archaeologists since Indiana Jones and Lara Croft. They also scream a lot.

However, they manage to find the lost tiki or Auric, which looks suspiciously like Magneto and after they pull it off the stand with a whip, Louie Kaboom comes and takes it from them, leaving them to die in the temple death traps.

Meanwhile, at the beach club, Kat brings Tanya a package that was delivered to their house. It's from Aisha! AISHA. You know what this show is missing? AISHA. Seriously, she just needs to come back and fix everyone's problems. Also enclosed in the package is a GIANT KEY and a map that apparently leads to Mysterio Island where Tanya's parents vanished from years ago. Apparently she's thought they were dead this whole time? Really? But now she knows they might be alive and she can maybe find them and this island that can't be found.

Tanya goes to ask Zordon if he can teleport her there, and he's all "no powers for personal gain" except decides to make an exception so she can go. Then out of NOWHERE Jason is all "Hey Tanya, why don't you trust me with the key?" and pouts and she looks totally confused as to why he thinks she isn't going to need the key, but for some reason she hands it over to him.

WHAT. JUST WHAT. Jason had NO RIGHT to ask her for that key. It has NOTHING to do with him. And of course he is promptly going to LOSE IT and SERIOUSLY HE IS THE WORST FRIEND EVER. Why would you go parade the key around? If they needed to put it in a safe place, WHY NOT THE POWER CHAMBER? Tanya has known Jason for ALL OF THREE EPISODES and this is STUPID.

Louie Kaboom uses the key to wake up Auric the Conqueror, who apparently only helps good people, so he refuses to help Louie. (Why he has Conqueror in his name, we don't know.) Sprocket is way smarter, and instead tells him that the Rangers are evil and he needs Auric's help to stop them from conquering, and Auric calls Sprocket a little metal boy and agrees. Sprocket is a pretty good manipulator.

Jason summons Pyramidas and goes to try and reason with Auric, and he fails at it. Rocky is wearing a really preppy shirt, which is frankly more interesting because I am still mad at Jason. Since Jason fails, they have to call Tanya back and prevent her from finding her parents at this point. Tanya is actually really cool about it and doesn't punch out Jason, which is way more than I would do, but they summon the Zords and say Zordon's name, and Auric realizes that they're the good guys. Because Zordon is totally famous.

Bulk and Skull lose another of Detective Stone's cars. Stone should really stop entrusting the cars to them.

For some reason, Tanya GIVES JASON THE KEY. NO. THAT IS STUPID. She goes on and says that she can't think of anyone she would trust more. I CAN NAME FIVE OR SIX OTHER PEOPLE. I'm seriously angry about this - Jason had no right to ask her for it in the first place.

She goes back and finds her parents who are about to be burned alive, but she turns the switch and saves her parents, and they ask who she is, and she says her name and there's a tearful reunion.

Fish: FIVE. JASON, YOU FAIL.

Fic we want: Seriously, Auric is totally Magneto. Make it happen.

Episode 180 - Song Sung Yellow

It's the Adam/Tanya show, live from Angel Grove!

I love this episode so freaking much. We begin with a music video for a song (sung by Tanya) that I actually kinda like. QR was mocking my taste, but when you've seen this episode as many times as I have, the song seriously starts to grow on you. It turns out that the video was directed by Adam, but frankly, even though they talk about how great it is and how he'll be a great director one day, he shouldn't quit his day job. (Speaking of how adorable Adam/Tanya is, Tanya says he's already a great director! Clearly, she is blinded by her love for him.)

Seriously, that video looks like one of the awful videos that plays at the karaoke place I visit when I'm home in New York. Or the most cheestastic bad 90s video. (If you look at it that way, it's pretty amazing.)

And Nakia has a great voice, so at least there's that!

Anyway, it turns out that they're screening the video at the Youth Center, and Tommy has been staring intently at it. They ask what's up, and Tommy says he thought he saw something, so they pause the video, and there's a Cog in the background.

.... Are they seriously suggesting that the Rangers filmed this video and didn't notice anything, and then spent hours editing it and still didn't notice? But TOMMY notices while watching the video for the first time? That is ridiculous. Everyone wonders how often the Cogs have been watching them.

Anyway, Ernie gives them some more free food, and it turns out that before this, the Youth Center was closed on the weekends, but now they're going to be open. Billy suggests that Tanya should get to sing Saturday nights, and Tanya is excited to be performing in front of a live audience for the first time. This leads to my personal fanon that when Tanya wins her first grammy, she thanks Ernie for letting her make a fool of herself on that stage. ♥ ♥ ♥

While the Rangers are setting up, the Cogs steal everything, and they completely fail to notice. They are so oblivious, it's ridiculous. What the hell was Zordon doing during all this? The Rangers chase after the cogs (after Rocky is done accusing Tommy of losing all of it) and there's a ridiculous fight that ends with a Cog getting pied. It's pretty awesome.

Of course, it turns out that it's Sprocket's Bar Mitzvah! He's going to become a man! Mazel Tov, Sprocket! Of course, to become a man he has to destroy the Rangers, so.... ahahahaha.

On a side note, how much do I love that the early villains mostly just exist to screw with the Rangers? It's so ridiculous, I love it.

Meanwhile, at Lt Stone's detective agency, Bulk and Skull are playing ping pong for the rights to be champion of the milky way and to rule as he sees fit. Sadly, before we find out who gets to rule the galaxy, Lt. Stone shows up, setting off the alarm system that they'd set off. I love them so much. It turns out that they have their first case, and it's to investigate a phony record producer. How much do I love this? Also, Skull uses the word scoundrels. Amazing.

At the Youth Center, Tanya is performing the same song, and when she finishes, she and Adam hug! Yay! Producer Vincent Nova shows up to tell Tanya she was awesome, and gives her a card and basically says he'll offer her a deal. She gives him a copy of the music video. She's all excited, and then people ask for her autograph. How adorable!!!!!

Bulk and Skull spy on the producer, which involves Bulk getting covered in garbage.

At school, Tanya is all excited about getting the contract, and her friends are all excited about it, but they do remind her that she'll have to quit school and stop Rangering if she goes. This would have been a great time to bring up Kimberly and point out that it isn't the first time someone has left the Rangers to follow a dream, but they don't bring it up.

The next Saturday, Tanya is singing again (a different song this time!) and the producers are watching her! The Rangers all get called away when a monster attacks, but Tommy gestures for Tanya to stay and finish her song. That's actually really sweet of him. You go, Tommy! Anyway, there's a fight scene and the Rangers win even without Tanya, and the only important thing is that Kat's individual weapon is totally a kamehameha! Epic. Sprocket gets to become a man anyway.

Later, the producers are talking to Tanya about limos and things, when Bulk and Skull burst in to try and save Tanya from a fake producer. She tells them that she's turned them down, and they tell her that a) she would have been an awesome diva and b) they'll wait for a talent like hers. She totally signs the contract the day she stops being a Ranger. Also, she lets Bulk and Skull know that they're real producers, and the two chase after the producers in the hopes of getting a deal.

Tanya tells her friends that she figured out what was really important - them. And school. And being a Ranger. But of course, she can sing any time. Kim was doing something that was way more dependent on age.

In conclusion - Tanya is awesome, and she and Adam are adorable. Also, Tanya grows up to win a bunch of Grammys and probably an Oscar for best song. I am also totally writing fic about this.

Fish - 2! Just for the nonsense with the cogs at the beginning.

Fic we want - All the schmoopy Adam/Tanya in the world. And you know, Tanya and her recording contract. :D

Episode 161 - Rangers in the Outfield

I promised Queenriley that I wouldn't spend the whole recap going "ADAM/TANYA I SHIP THEM SO HARD" so let me get this out of my system now.

ADAM/TANYA OTP <33333333333333333333333333333333333333333

Um. Possibly I love this episode. It has my favorite things! Baseball! Adam being adorable! Tanya standing up for herself! Shawn getting what's coming to him! FAAAAAAAVORITES.

Pretty much, if there wasn't such a boring Zord fight, and if Adam's wardrobe didn't suck so hard, this might be my favorite episode.

Anyway, we open with a baseball practice. Adam and Rocky are on the team, and they are both very pretty. Tanya shows up to watch the practice because her asshat boyfriend Shawn is on the team. Adam tells Tanya that Shawn's nickname is the Sultan of Swat, because he's like Babe Ruth or something. Whatever. What Shawn actually is would be a grade A asshat.

A pitch comes towards them, and Tanya catches the ball and throws it back. She has never held a baseball before, but she is A++++ awesome at it. The coach sends his pitcher to take a shower, and then has Tanya pitch. She strikes out Shawn, because she is awesome. Especially considering the shoes she's pitching in. And the skirt.

Later, Shawn is being mocked by his friends for being struck out by his girlfriend. He comes over to Tanya, where the Rangers are all congratulating her for being so awesome. Shawn is all "Yeah, well, it was luck. I wasn't concentrating" and then there is RAAAAAAAAAGE. Everyone defends Tanya for being awesome, and she sticks up for herself, and if Adam wasn't wearing a ridiculously baggy sweatshirt, this would be the greatest ever. Adam invites Shawn to go to batting practice with them the next morning, and he admits that he needs the practice.

Meanwhile, Prince Sprocket comes up with a plan to use the batting cage thing so that if someone hits something, they'll be stuck in a monster. Bulk and Skull are supposed to be doing "refuse removal" but they try to bat, and fail to hit anything. Rocky, Adam and the asshat show up, but Shawn forgot his batting gloves, so he leaves. Rocky hits something, and is then trapped. Adam is very concerned.

Cue giant ridiculously boring fight scene. It took up half the episode, but it was just really boring. Tommy manages to get himself also captured, which means he's able to hand Rocky his zeonizers, and then they summon zords and use the stupid battle helmets, and blah blah blah, sword destroys robot. I don't really care.

Now, we get to the important part! The game! It's the bottom of the 9th, and Tanya is still pitching. A whole game? That is pretty damn impressive. She's clearly getting tired, though. She throws two strikes, but the guy manages to hit the last pitch, and it looks like it's going to be a home run, but Rocky manages to leap up and catch it! Because he's awesome!

I would have liked it if Tanya had managed to strike the guy out, but Queenriley had a good point - the next part wouldn't have been nearly as satisfying if she had. You see, Shawn shows up to yell at her for nearly blowing the game, but Adam defends Tanya, pointing out that it's a team sport, and she only had a 1 run lead, and you know, she did a great job overall. Shawn tells Tanya she's not good enough, and Tanya has had enough and dumps him. BECAUSE SHE IS AWESOME AND DESERVES BETTER. Like the guy in green standing next to her.

Adam tells her he's proud of her, and she's all "well, I guess I did ok with the game" and he's all "NO. For being awesome and realizing you deserve better!" Tanya is sad because she's lost a boyfriend, and Adam is so clearly going "Hi! RIGHT HERE" but sadly there is no smooching. :(

Possibly because Rocky shows up to cockblock them.

STILL. THIS EPISODE. HEARTS!

Fish: 2. The splicing in the fight scene was pretty ridiculous, and Tanya did learn baseball pretty fast. But you know, she's that awesome.

Fic we want: ALL THE ADAM/TANYA IN THE WORLD. ALL OF IT.

Episode 158- A Shooting Star

This episode can be summed up in two sentences. Cheating is bad, guys, just in case you didn't know. And the wardrobe department is seriously messed in the head this season.

So basically, we have two storylines. In one, Tanya is distraught at being the new kid in school. She's made a friend in Shawn, a boy she's tutoring in Algebra. There is flirtation! Shawn is a dumbass though. He wants to cheat, not study, and so he shows Tanya he has the answers to the test. She can't support him in cheating and so he throws a hissy fit trying to manipulate her by doing a friends-break up with her. She is clearly too awesome and doesn't fall for it. In the end, he realizes she's right and he turns the test answers into Principal Caplan. He goes to her for help and apologizes. Her respect is important to him (uh, for now, but we totes know what you're up to later, Shawn, and you're a jerky jerkface who deserves at least a slap, if not a kick in the balls, preferably both... and for you, we make a new tag, Sir) and she, after a minute of teasing, agrees to help. Problem solved. Or is it?

In the other storyline, Billy is building the Zeo Zords in a Super Secret Location. That the Cogs ferret out in all of about a minute. He's even skipping school to build the zords, which isn't surprising because he could show up for tests only and still get 110%. Once again we wonder why in the world Billy didn't graduate at the age of six and have his Master's by the time he was ten. Based on the fact that all the boys are wearing long sleeves, jackets, and baggy clothing, effectively covering them completely, I think it's safe to assume it's probably January or February and it's cold out. So why why why are the girls wearing scrap fabric for skirts and tight tops? Really? I mean, I don't think those skirts could get any shorter if they TRIED. And alas, this is a trend that continues all season. Anyway, Billy finishes the Zords and, despite warning them it's not safe to use them yet, the Rangers have to go fight their first Machine Empire monster. The battle is boring, but the Zord is pretty awesome and Adam is happy to finally have a cool Zord, however brief that may be (oh honey, if only you knew what was in store for you next season... because I am literally the only person in the world who LOVES minivans and did even as a teenager). They win, of course, and King Mondo is distraught.

Meanwhile, Bulk and Skull still have Rito and Goldar enslaved. Rito is now wearing a French Maid's outfit. Goldar gets snippy, but Rito grovels. It's... still very disturbing.

Fish: 2.5. It wasn't bad, overall, but... well... yeah. It's still Power Rangers.